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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-29-06 05:25 PM
Original message
blunt doctor
my pdoc has actually said the following....

On our first meeting I told him all of my problems....when I told him about Mr. Sniffa he said "what does he get out of being in a relationship with someone like you?"

When discussing my disablity he said he wasn't ready to "throw me in the useless bin just yet"

and

when trying to tackle the weight issues that always come along with meds....he said " well do you want to be happy or skinny?"

is it me or is this guy a royal dick?
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varkam Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-29-06 05:44 PM
Response to Original message
1. Sounds like he is a royal dick.
Unfortunately, there are many docs out there who tend to lack things such as empathy and bedside manner. I remember that I took my girlfriend to the ER a while back for heart palpitations. We ended up waiting 6 hours to see a physician, and when she finally came into the room she told my girlfriend that there was nothing that they could do and she was just going to have to "toughen up".

Not all docs are like that, but for being in the business of healing people, you think they would be few and far between. Unfortunately that's not the case.

I'd get a new doc, if I were you. :pals:
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jul-29-06 05:46 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. I would love a new doc
thing is I LOVE my therapist and they are kinda a package deal....hmmmm what to do....maybe I'll talk more with my therapist about it...she is aware of my concerns...
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NMMNG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-01-06 01:06 AM
Response to Original message
3. I vote for "royal dick"
If you're going to continue to see him I'd suggest making some snappy comebacks to his nasty comments, or at least telling him you don't like his rude behavior. Maybe he'll change his tone. For a mental health professional he certainly doesn't seem to engender good self-esteem.
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mopinko Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-01-06 09:47 AM
Response to Original message
4. do you really spend that much time with him?
pdocs seem to settle in to a 15-30 med check type of thing, and aren't usually the ones you talk to about your troubles, afaik. now that he has filled out the first page of your file, he may be done asking about anything but medication issues.
not to say that you shouldn't dump this guy, but if you are stuck with him, you are stuck with him. the important relationship is with your tdoc.
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BigMama50 Donating Member (58 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-02-06 03:56 PM
Response to Original message
5. He has a point with the happy or skinny crack
although I guess with a lot of exercise you could be both.
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ncrainbowgrrl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 10:19 PM
Response to Reply #5
9. No he doesn't have a point.
There are enough meds out there that this DOES NOT have to be a choice. There are various combinations of meds that a GOOD p-doc can combine to make something work for you. If the doctor says this, it sounds to me like either one of 2 things.

1.He's an asshole.
2. He lacks the knowledge of more modern techniques in patient medicine management and is saying this because this is not something that he has bothered to keep up with since getting licensed to dispense meds. I was lucky in that my psychopharmacologist worked with me through HORRIBLE side effects on some drugs, partial responses to others, and using other meds to augment my SSRI, I was able to have an almost 5 year remission from both dysthymic disorder and Major Depressive Disorder.

The one thing I kept saying is that I don't want to gain weight.

I won't be happy if I gain weight, as I have a knee problem (ok-lots of knee issues- patella problems, ligament issues (ACL)) and when I gain more than 5 pounds (I'm about 125lbs), I start to lose mobility. At this point, I can get by without surgery. But I was warned by the ortho that if I was to gain more weight and put additional stress/weight on the bad knee situation, rubbing away what little cartilage I have left, I would no longer be able to take a "wait-and-see" approach.

We tried one drug before getting the correct combo for the remission- all I could do was eat- and all I wanted to eat were carbs. I packed on the weight quickly, and called the doctor to ask if he had anything else up his sleeve. He told me that he'd find something. And he did. He said that he understood my concerns, and if I was laid up in a bed after surgery, I sure as heck wasn't going to be a happy camper.

Sounds like the doctor has an attitude problem. If he seriously didn't know how to help you, he should refer you to a specialist, or at least admit that he wasn't that knowledgable, but would try to find out different approaches to treatment without you gaining weight.

Ok, I'll stop ranting.

take care!




..
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 02:59 PM
Response to Original message
6. I think I'd fire this asshole in a heartbeat.
We had one of these. Passive agressive bs where helpfulness should be.
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undergroundpanther Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 03:47 PM
Response to Original message
7. Let me be blunt
Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 03:48 PM by undergroundpanther
He's an asshole. Using"honesty and bluntness" to cover up for the fact he IS an asshole really at heart and he is using the ol catch 22 game.. Don't just dump him and go,Do tell him he is an abusive jerk and that he HURT you. Tell him to get some EMOTIONAL intelligence.

People CHOOSE their words for a reason. What is his reasons to say MEAN shit to you? Psst.. he has no reason other than he likes being an insensitive ass and getting away with it.

http://www.kspope.com/therapistas/research9.php
http://www.successfulschizophrenia.org/stories/ritsbern.html
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hashibabba Donating Member (894 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-12-06 06:36 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Try Wellbutrin for weight
Supposedly (OK, this isn't how it worked on me the second time I went on it) it doesn't cause as much weight gain. I also had a boss who took paxil or zoloft and the second one she tried, she lost a ton of weight taking it.

I don't talk to my pdoc all that much. (Although I was a little *high* from a mood destabilization, the last time I went in and talked her ear off) Its mostly my therapist. I think my therapists have always helped me more than my pdocs, except for a good pdoc that finally put me on a good drug cocktail to help me. So watch for that and if its a problem, you really need to find another pdoc and therapist. Many therapists are more compassionate than Psychiatrists, in my experience.

There's no reason to let a doctor talk to you like that. Mention it to your therapist and see what they say. Maybe its a common problem with this particular pdoc. That happened to me a number of years ago and my therapist must have been sick of my complaining and outrage over what a bad doctor I had, so I got transferred to another, much better one. My therp said a lot of people complained about the idiot.


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