Body image issues

[TrogL]

My girlfriend and I had a long talk about body image issues. I bought a copy of Comsopolitan magazine as a joke but she ended up reading it cover to cover twice, pointing out the articles (see other thread) about the girls perfectly made up and the full-page weight-loss ads and the big ad in the back offering payment plans for breast augmentation done by no-questions-asked doctors :scared:

She was horribly scared that I "wouldn't like the way she looked" and she got REALLY upset when she caught sight of herself in a mirror.

I had a psychologist appointment yesterday and this came up in conversation and then she pointed out a few things:

• I take absolutely NO care for my body
  
• My clothes look like they've been slept in (they have)
  
• I obsessively pick at my skin trying to make it "perfect" (which it isn't)
  
• My hair looks like it hasn't been brushed this month (it hasn't)
  
• I'm obsessed with the perfect tan
  
• I'm obsessed with Speedos (OK, 24 pair is a bit much)
  
• "meatspace" (google it) and my brushes with Catharism and Gnosticism
  

As if that wasn't bad enough, last my girlfriend and I got talking about our childhoods and she mentioned a few things in her past and I started remembering stuff I haven't thought of for years...

.

...and then I started triggering...

.

...then I started revolving door flipping and no she didn't freak out because she's seen it before.

The can of worms is open.

[undergroundpanther]

1. Don't feel bad

My partner is dissociative too.

Anyways we are both ex satanists and ex fundamentalists,ex buddhists,and Gnostic's too.We are unashamed Dualists these days .
Searching for answers leads to some weird head spaces until all is consistent(as much as can be) inside with the way reality is experienced.

Here is my view of Gnosis in a nutshell,this dualistic view makes sense to me.But with this view I have to be careful and to use my discernment and be humble about it if I am mistaken.


The POV I have is:
Evil emerged from a Celestial Error and this error made a half made fake reality,the one we are in... where viable beings have been trapped by counterfeit ,lying,control freak beings that are generated through us,and through the sickness of this reality harnessed and exploited by this parasitic,evil,cancerous,controlling,empire like, unnatural consciousness(Archons)

There is a War of Essences,(Archon VS non-Archon) to be resolved . This reality is Archon dominated which means the majority of consciousnesses, including some of those in human bodies, are sick and dangerous.(like sociopaths)

The consciousness that is still viable will be eventually evacuated and relocated in a New Dimension more to it's own kind.

There are two sorts of realities ,kinda like a stereo image, a True One, and a fake one,that attempts to imitate the orginal reality .And the fake reality parasitically has taken over a portion of the True One.

There's a war between the 2 realities - 2 natures - 2 wills - 2 principles.

The reality of temporary, yet malignant,meaningless,chaotic,destructive painful evilness.

Sometime somehow there will be a final Corrective Process consisting of a forcible separation of the two realties(end of this dualistic state) The transmutation and sifting of the non-viable consciousnesses in all classes of consciousness: mineral, vegetable, animal, human, spiritual, galactic and universal forever separating the dangerous consciousness from the viable consciousness.

[shrike]

2. I know very few women who don't have a body image issue

I look at old pictures of myself and marvel at how thin I looked. I was convinced I was fat at the time.

[bloom]

3. where I live

there are many women - adults - who are not obsessed with their hair/clothes/bodies and I think it's really nice to be in such an environment. If I had to live inside TV world or Cosmopolitan world - I can't imagine what I would do. Maybe I would adapt - but I would hate it.

My suggestion. Maybe find a nature group/group of artists or something where the people aren't so focused on their appearances. :shrug: It might be an inspiration.



As far as the worms go - I think it can be better to have things out in the open.


Also - this was in the New York Times recently:

December 29, 2005
Op-Ed Contributor
Don't Think Twice, It's All Right

By TIMOTHY D. WILSON
Charlottesville, Va.

IT'S navel gazing time again, that stretch of the year
when many of us turn our attention inward and think
about how we can improve the way we live our lives.
But as we embark on this annual ritual of
introspection, we would do well to ask ourselves a
simple question: Does it really do any good?

The poet Theodore Roethke had some insight into the
matter: "Self-contemplation is a curse / That makes an
old confusion worse." As a psychologist who conducts
research on self-knowledge and happiness, I think
Roethke had a point, one that's supported by a growing
body of controlled psychological studies.

Not sure how you feel about a special person in your
life? Analyzing the pluses and minuses of the
relationship might not be the answer.

In a study I conducted with Dolores Kraft, a clinical
psychologist at the University of Texas Southwestern
Medical Center, and Dana Dunn, a social psychologist
at Moravian College in Pennsylvania, people in one
group were asked to list the reasons their
relationship with a romantic partner was going the way
it was, and then rate how satisfied they were with the
relationship. People in another group were asked to
rate their satisfaction without any analysis; they
just gave their gut reactions.

It might seem that the people who thought about the
specifics would be best at figuring out how they
really felt, and that their satisfaction ratings would
thus do the best job of predicting the outcome of
their relationships.

In fact, we found the reverse. It was the people in
the "gut feeling" group whose ratings predicted
whether they were still dating their partner several
months later. As for the navel gazers, their
satisfaction ratings did not predict the outcome of
their relationships at all. Our conclusion? Too much
analysis can confuse people about how they really
feel. There are severe limits to what we can discover
through self-reflection, and trying to explain the
unexplainable does not lead to a sudden parting of the
seas with our hidden thoughts and feelings revealed
like flopping fish.

Self-reflection is especially problematic when we are
feeling down. Research by Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, a
clinical psychologist at Yale University, shows that
when people are depressed, ruminating on their
problems makes things worse....