I just got back from the second premarital counselling session...

[YellowRubberDuckie]

We filled out this inventory about who we are, what we think, and what we want. Subjects were from sex to our family histories. Anyone else ever done this? See, Skip's agnostic, so my deacon, while openminded about the whole thing, is a little apprehensive that we don't care about the other's beliefs. He has the same beliefs that I do. They just don't include God because he's never seen enough proof that God actually exists or not.
Also, the cool thing about it is in this state if you go through this process, they only charge you $5 to get married instead of $50.
Duckie

[AngryOldDem]

1. I did

My husband and I went through precana with a deacon as well. It was a series of four or five sessions (if memory serves) and they were quite helpful. (Some people, I think, may not take them very seriously, but if you do, I think you will gain better insight into both yourself and your fiance.) Mainly our sessions focused on topics like sex, kids, and money, and the deacon and his wife shared their experiences in the subject area, then we had some conversation. Then my husband and I were given an exercise or questionnaire to fill out separately and then discuss with each other. We learned nothing really new (we were both in our late 20s at the time, so we weren't exactly kids heading blind into marriage), but I think we both found the process helpful. If anything, it enhances your communication skills as a couple, and brings out those areas where you may have disagreements on, and offers a safe forum to discuss those differences.

Best wishes to you on your marriage!

[shrike]

2. My husband's an agnostic

And my pastor certainly didn't care. But he's an old hand who's been around the block, and he's probably seen everything.

Good luck with the counseling, and I'm sure your deacon, and your intended, will adjust.

[Princess Turandot]

3. Years ago, friends of mine went to pre-cana counseling..

at the church which the woman had grown up attending. The aged Pastor was involved in their session. When they got to the point of discussing children, my friend, not wanting to lie, said they weren't sure if they wanted kids. (They now have 2.) Oy Veh! The pastor stood up and said he would not marry them and left the room.

They made an appointment with a younger priest in the parish and had no trouble with the pre-cana sessions, even tho they told him the same thing.

I was in her wedding party. We're lined up in the vestibule of the church for the rehearshal, when suddenly the bride to be cried out and burst into tears.The priest had had a death in the family,and had to leave immediately after the rehearsal, and that the Pastor was going to say the marriage mass. She was hysterical and the priest kept trying to tell her that it would be okay.She was convinced that the Pastor was going to ruin the wedding for them by giving a homily chastizing them for their uncertain attitude re kids.

Her dad was a retired taciturn airforce colonel and a converted Catholic. He went over to the Church the morning of the wedding then came back. He never said why he went over, but our theory was that he went over to have a little chat with the Pastor abt the ramifications of ruining his daughter's wedding day. The service went very smoothly.