So....where are all the Discordians?

[Khephra]

Hail Eris!

:evilgrin:

[sans qualia]

1. I'd be a Discordian, but I like hot dogs too much.

:-(

[solinvictus]

2. Is there a rule against hot dogs?

That seems odd for a chaotic religion. Considering the gas station hot dog is a delicacy to me, I wouldn't make it.

[toddaa]

8. Form a radical splinter group

That's what the subgenii did and look what happened to them.

[htuttle]

16. You can eat the hot dog, just not the bun

Except on Fridays, when it's mandatory.

[Khephra]

3. You got it wrong...you're allowed to eat hot dogs

but without the bun. You can only eat the buns on Friday, as I understand it, as Friday is the day we "remonstrate against" all religions--even Discordianism.

THE FIVE COMMANDMENTS (THE PENTABARF)

The PENTABARF was discovered by the hermit Apostle Zarathud in the Fifth Year of The Caterpillar. He found them carved in gilded stone, while building a sun deck for his cave, but their import was lost for they were written in a mysterious cypher. However, after 10 weeks & 11 hours of intensive scrutiny he discerned that the message could be read by standing on his head and viewing it upside down.

KNOW YE THIS O MAN OF FAITH!

I - There is no Goddess but Goddess and She is Your Goddess. There is no Erisian Movement but The Erisian Movement and it is The Erisian Movement. And every Golden Apple Corps is the beloved home of a Golden Worm.

II - A Discordian Shall Always use the Official Discordian Document Numbering System.

III - A Discordian is Required during his early Illumination to Go Off Alone & Partake Joyously of a Hot Dog on a Friday; this Devotive Ceremony to Remonstrate against the popular Paganisms of the Day: of Catholic Christendom (no meat on Friday), of Judaism (no meat of Pork), of Hindic Peoples (no meat of Beef), of Buddhists (no meat of animal), and of Discordians (no Hot Dog Buns).

IV - A Discordian shall Partake of No Hot Dog Buns, for Such was the Solace of Our Goddess when She was Confronted with The Original Snub.

V - A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing what he reads.

IT IS SO WRITTEN! SO BE IT. HAIL DISCORDIA! PROSECUTORS WILL BE TRANSGRESSICUTED.

http://www.principiadiscordia.com/book/11.php

[sans qualia]

4. Yeah I know, but dude, what's a hot dog without a hot dog bun?

The two are inseparable in my mind.

[Khephra]

5. I'm a Pope, so I'll exempt you from the rule

They're all meant to be broken anyway.

:evilgrin:

[htuttle]

6. Oh, no! What are you doing!?!?!

We Discordians are supposed to stick apart!

(I've always assumed that was so we could cover more ground...)

:evilgrin:

[Khephra]

7. We have to break our own rules sometimes

If we didn't then there wouldn't be any Discordian Cabals to cause trouble. Hacking reality sometimes requires a team effort.

:evilgrin:

[knight_of_the_star]

12. ROFLMFAO!!!

Wow, that was great!!!

Just out of curiosity, would you guys consider Monty Python-style satire to be an example of the faith?

[htuttle]

13. Not as much as the Marx Brothers

A Marxist Joke

Chico: Hey, I heard there's a million dollars in the house next door.
Groucho: But, there is no house next door!
Chico: No? Well, let's go build one then!

And of course, the Society of Fred Mertz, Boddhisattva, holds that all wisdom is contained in the remarks of Fred Mertz on 'I Love Lucy'. For example, "I don't know what's going on around here!", and "I don't understand women at all!"

If it doesn't make you laugh, it's not true.

:)

[Jackpine Radical]

14. I don't understand.

The only way to obey the rule that you have to break all the rules, would be to follow the rules, which of course is against the rules...

[htuttle]

15. Thus, the significance of the Friday Hot Dog

During most of the week, Discordians are forbidden to eat hot dogs buns, to honor the 'Original Snub' of Our Lady of Perpetual Motion, Eris.

By partaking of a hot dog on Friday during their early studies, however, the Discordian acolyte learns to offend all the world's major religions with this one simple act:

1) Catholicism: No red meat on Friday (pre-V2, anyway)
2) Buddhism: No meat
3) Hinduism: No meat from a cow
4) Judaism/Islam: No pork
5) Discordianism: No hot dog buns.

[robbedvoter]

9. I heartily disagree with all this!

:evilgrin:
I think Groucho Marx's rule applies: "I refuse to be a member of any club that would have me"

[meti57b]

10. Imagine there's a group that you're a part of and you will have found them

[toddaa]

11. RA Wilson trick

Is that like RAW's finding a quarter trick?

[davidinalameda]

17. no buns?

so just the mean huh

:evilgrin: