The Battered Race Syndrome

[cleanheart.396]

I am a 54 year old Black woman. For reasons, which only indirectly concern this post,I never use the term African American when referring to myself. Years ago, I worked as a Counselor-Advocate at the Battered Women's Shelter in my city, and over the years I have found that to my way of thinking, Black people's actions, collectively, mirror the belief system and consequent behavior of the Battered Woman.
Battered women and their batterers, we learned, both theoretically and practically, share the same belief system. I have found that this is true of Black people as a race. We believe many of the same things that our oppressors believe. Our insistence on entering the mainstream of a political system which has been responsible for the massive genocide and/or enslavement of, either actually or colonially, Native Americans, Blacks, Vietnamese, etc., says that we want the opportunity to do the same thing. We go to war to prove our loyalty, when the same war was waged against us. Yet, we never question a government which is infamous for its capacity for lying and has constructed the most complex maze of intelligence, coercion, etc. as a means of covering up the truth. Like battered women, we find the truth out later, and still we maintain the hope that springs eternal that somehow the batterer will change. Meanwhile we adopt all the batterers suicidal behaviors: the compulsion to win at any cost; the preoccupation with the acquisition of stolen wealth; racism against both dark-skinned and lighter-skinned blacks; the acquisition of an education, not designed to really teach us anything, as it is filled to overflowing with omissions and outright lies. Like the battered woman who encourages her children to understand the batterer, to not arouse his enmity, to sucker up to him and get what little affection he's capable of giving, African Americans encourage their children to go to war, receive a falsified education, and show the oppressor that we're worthy to be oppressors too (that's what it means to be an Investment Banker or the CEO of a major company, or an officer in the armed forces). Have we ever insisted that we speak to the people we'll be killing before we consent to go to war? Why do we trust a government than can't be trusted, rather than begin to change ourselves so that we don't need the toxic way of life offered by the oppressor? They lied about us as Africans, and used that lie to justify the wholesale slaughter and slavery of over 100 million Africans. Why do we believe what they say about anyone, especially when they want to go to war? They did the same thing to the Native Americans, yet, because they are as powerless as we are, we don't even bother to recognize them as the rightful original government of this country. We insult them every time we petition the government for our "rights," to a system that virtually incarcerated them. We don't ever admit it, but we admire and identify with the power which exploits us, much the same way as wild animal enthusiasts admire and "respect" lions, tigers, and pythons, while ignoring the animals they prey upon.
Since Blacks have been in this country, we have been given a whole host of instructions about how to "fit in," and like the battered woman, we twist and turn, elongate and shrink ourselves to fit into whatever shape they tell us will make who we are more palatable to them. And no matter what we do, like the batterer, our oppressors are never satisfied. This is because, like the batterer, our oppressors are to frightened, insecure, and because of this, need control far too much to ever stop battering us.
The "battering syndrome" has 3 phases: Phase 1. The "build-up" to the initial battering incident; the build-up, in the case of African Americans, consists of police brutality, welfare "reform," disproportionate unemployment; unfair news reporting which uses black violence as diversion from the fact that we are housed and ruled by an even more violent gang__our oppressors. During this time we, like battered women, do everything to please, hoping the batterer will accept that we want to do everything his way, and that we don't want to "upset him" or give him the wrong impression. Like battered women encourage their children not to "upset" the batterer, we encourage other black people to be "cool," to not tell the truth, so that the batterer won't get mad and hurt us, or at the very least, not help us. This was the reaction of many "upwardly mobile" Blacks to Kanye West's comments about George Bush not caring about Black people.
Phase 2. The Actual Battering Incident: In recent times, the New Orleans fiasco. In more historic times, The Dred Scott decision; The forming of the KKK; the list is endless.
Phase 3. The Honeymoon Period: This is the period where the batterer uses his charm and calculated generosity to keep the battered woman from leaving him. In the case of Black Americans, there have been several honeymoon periods: Reconstruction, Integration, Affirmative Action, Busing, and the prosecution of known murderers of Civil Rights workers and leaders.
And of course, the cycle just begins again. When we get tired we, like battered women, either wish to kill the batterer (black revolutionaries, communists, etc.), or we try to kill ourselves (drugs, crime, gangs created out of hopelessness and misery).
What we never do, however, is try to think past the system which abuses us. Because we won't admit that our belief system is similar to that of our current oppressor, we can 't see ourselves clearly. So, we keep trying to fit in rather than take the time to imagine a life system that is wholesome, loving, life-giving, outside the confines of American "democracy." Something that is fashioned independently of what exists now. Battered women do the same thing. They just keep looking for the right "master" one who won't hit them. But they still want a master. That's easier than thinking for themselves. I am not blaming the victim. I am simply saying that all victims participate in their victimization. Usually by donning every accoutrement of the oppressor.
I believe we have to stop "trying to get in." We have to stop asking for a respect that we can only give to ourselves. We have to stop coveting the "master's/batterers" power and create a power which is real power. What the oppressor has is just the means to control us by pandering to our primary weakness: the fear of creating a better system, based on what we've learned, based on the character which builds love. We have to do whatever soul-searching it will take for us to believe that we can transcend what's already been designed, even by us and our African ancestors. Can we accept that perhaps we were never meant to "melt" into the proverbial "melting pot," that perhaps they keep us out because it is our destiny to use our experience to create something the world has never seen, that its spiritual leaders and philosophers have only dreamed of?
Think about it.