I'm trying to teach a racist about white privilege - help appreciated

[StrongbadTehAwesome]

Ok, here's the deal. My little brother (18) has turned out to be hugely racist - we're talking two steps shy of seeking out a neo-Nazi group. I'm only recently learning this, because he's pretty quiet about it for the most part, but it all came out when I started trying to talk to him about political stuff. Apparently according to him, everything wrong with America is the fault of affirmative action and minorities. :puke: Of course, he's "earned" his place in life "through hard work."

I tried to talk to him a little about institutionalized racism, but since he (astonishingly) actually holds the belief that on average, white people are smarter/harder-working/whatever than anyone else, the things I point out to him as examples just reinforce his screwed-up beliefs. Like the fact that at my university on any given day at lunchtime, 90% of the people buying lunch are white, and 100% of the people making, serving, and ringing up those lunches are black...he just takes this as evidence that most black people are lazy.

SO...I'm going to attempt the incredibly huge task of showing him how
WRONG that is. I'm not sure how much of it he will believe, or how much of what he believes will sink in, but I have to try. But being a white girl who has a long way to go in her own understanding of just how ingrained racism can be, I'd appreciate any help you can give.

I'm planning to start out with a simple list of things, like, "being white, you can do the following things":

1. Open a history book and find people of your race described on every page, without having to turn to a special section or wait for a special month. Read how people of your race "discovered" and "settled" areas already where others were already living.
2. Buy "flesh-colored" band-aids that roughly match your skin color.
3. Go to the Galleria (a nice area mall), alone, in pretty much any kind of clothing you wish, without being followed or harassed by security, and without any salespeople suggesting that you might have better luck finding clothes "in your style" at Northwest Plaza (a mall that's fallen victim to the retail version of white flight).
4. Succeed academically, at your job, or wherever without being called a credit to your race.

etc., etc.

[Brewman_Jax]

1. Unpacking the invisible knapsack

by Peggy McIntosh is what you're looking for. Here it is at http://seamonkey.ed.asu.edu/~mcisaac/emc598ge/Unpacking.html

You've got an uphill challenge. Good luck. :hi:

[StrongbadTehAwesome]

2. thanks! nt

[kk897]

4. great essay, thanks, too!

Sadly, I noted that it was written almost 20 years ago and so little has changed. Maybe in academic circles...a little...

Has anyone ever seen Todd Solondz's film "Storytelling"? (I think that was the name). That's one that sure as heck casts light on the subject of white privilege. It's very, very provocative.

[GOPFighter]

3. All you can do is plant the seeds....

...don't get frustrated. Almost everyone I've ever met that has racist or homophobic or xenophobic attitudes appear to also suffer from insecurity or an inferiority complex. This isn't too unusual among teens...as you know it is or was a tough time for most of us. He may not respond to your logic and examples right away, but his respect and love for you will give your words a lot of validity, and when he feels more comfortable in his world he will look around and see the truth. Right now he is looking inward, possibly afraid he isn't measuring up to expectations, and needs someone or something to blame.

I applaud your efforts to show him why he is wrong to feel blacks are inferior, just keep trying and don't get discouraged if you don't see him change right away. Good luck!

[mark414]

5. something as simple as a movie can help, even if just a little

i always thought 'american history x' should be required viewing for everyone.

there were some great sidney poitier movies that dealt with the subject too, 'a raisin in the sun,' 'guess who's coming to dinner,' 'a patch of blue'

or you could even take a movie like 'pleasantville' which features an all white cast and turn that into a lesson.

there are lots of great movies out there that, as someone noted above, can help to start to plant the seeds

[kk897]

6. American History X might be instructive...

...for this young man, since it details how a white supremacist learns the error of his ways. Or, he could end up thinking, gee, that guy's cool (in the beginning of the movie, when he's deep into National Front kind of stuff).

Maybe the problem could be addressed in other ways, too. Sounds like maybe he's never really gotten to know anyone other than white people, so it's easier for him to make judgements about "the other." He's definitely thinking in terms of stereotypes. Maybe turn the tables? Confront him with stereotypes associated with whatever subculture he's into (if he is)--even just "young people"?

Example: "I read the other day that people under 21 just don't care about current events." (a really gentle example).

Example: "Every movie I see that shows kids into metal portrays them as really dumb and always wasted. You're not like that--how about your friends?"

I don't know...if he can start to see that stereotypes affecting him, personally, exist, and that the stereotypes are damaging and untrue, maybe he could start to broaden his perspective some? Maybe he'd begin to apply that insight to other groups?

[Brewman_Jax]

7. Adding to the movie list

Soul Man starring C. Thomas Howell. After getting his finances cut off by his parents, he turns turns himself black in order to get a scholarship to Harvard. He then learns that being black in America is hardly the walk in the park he thought it was.

American History X is definitely a good choice. :thumbsup:

[SemiCharmedQuark]

8. I can't even teach progressives about white privilege.

But good luck.

[Karenina]

9. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

[kk897]

10. OK, let's say for a moment that I, a pale progressive, "get it."

(I'm not pretending that I ever can completely get it, but I try).

How did I get this way? Why is it that I can see through the white veil more clearly than other pale progressives? And whatever qualities that allow me to see through the white veil more clearly--can these qualities be communicated or taught to others?

It's striking to me that so many people, DUers, progressives, what-have-you, are accustomed to deconstructing the Right but not the White. I try to deconstruct just about everything. Why is it that I think about it so much and not them?

I don't have any answers, really... I have a couple of theories: I have a good imagination, so I can more easily place myself in the shoes of others. Sometimes this (nearly) empathetic ability can tear me up, but at the same time I realize that I'LL NEVER REALLY KNOW what anyone, much less someone from a terribly oppressed group, really goes through.

I also have this almost pathological distaste for what I consider to be injustice. Even when I was a kid... y'know how all the time in sitcoms you'll see the main character be completely misunderstood and all of his or her friends turn their backs on him or her? That used to just drive me nuts when I was a tot. At this point, some thirty years later, I've learned to cope with those storylines :P but real-life injustices continue to haunt me.

Maybe it's the fact that I'm a total bookworm and have been since age 2? The greatest gift my mother ever gave me was teaching me to read that young. My insatiable curiosity at least can be held in check somewhat by reading just about anything I can, because I want to UNDERSTAND! Understand... while at the same time acknowledging that I'll never, ever truly understand a damn thing.

Weird, huh?

Hell, it's not like I'm some model of good behavior or anything. I guess I *am* sort of saying, "hey white people, learn from me!" but maybe that's just hubris. All the qualities I've listed above are probably possessed by 90 percent of the people posting on DU...

ah, I'll STFU now (been saying that a lot today... guess I'm not doing real good with that, though, am I?)

[kwassa]

11. my take

kk897:
"I have a couple of theories: I have a good imagination, so I can more easily place myself in the shoes of others. Sometimes this (nearly) empathetic ability can tear me up, but at the same time I realize that I'LL NEVER REALLY KNOW what anyone, much less someone from a terribly oppressed group, really goes through."

My lesson, too. As much as I can learn and know, I can never know that.

I try to shut up and listen a lot, though I can't help shooting my mouth off from time to time, because I've done a lot of listening, and I can't stand the ignance from the white folk.

Bottom line: Progressives should know better, and many of them don't.

[jmm]

12. flesh colored band-aids, that brings back memories

When I was in 1st grade we were suppose to do a class mural. The teacher hyped it up as a big deal and went on about how we would get to use flesh toned crayons. I know now they make multi-ethnic crayons but then (and keep in mind I'm only 25) about the only ethnicities covered were eastern and western Europe. I refused to draw. She told me to use a black crayola and my friend Mark screamed she's not that dark. When told to add white I replied that I'm not gray. Pretty soon most of they class refused to draw because they agreed it was unfair that they all got bought these special crayons and I was left out.

Like someone else wrote I feel most people who hold racist views are insecure. When I was in college I had a few white people tell me that they were concerned about how they would become successful but that I didn't have to worry because of my color.

[fishwax]

13. that's a neat story

about the crayons and you and your classmates refusing to color. My wife is a teacher, and I think she would be thrilled to have her class come together against an injustice like that (she has the multicultural crayons, so it wouldn't be an issue, but still). How stupid that the only choices for skin tone for so many years were peach and black. When she got her first classroom and let the kids have access to 128 different shades of human crayon, it was a real eye opener to many of those kids, white and non-white students both.

Anyway, props to you for standing your ground though, and thanks for sharing the story. :)