Can anyone help me with insight about my daughter?

[LiberalEsto]

I have two daughters, 25, and 22. The older one shares an apartment with her steady boyfriend and is generally responsible and nice to be around.

The 22-year-old is very temperamental and often downright nasty. She lives with her boyfriend in Virginia most of the year. He's attending a good 4-year-school, and she's been going to school at a community college there (costing us out-of-state tuition rates)for a year and a half. This past semester is the first one in which she has passed all 4 courses instead of withdrawing from them. We attribute that in part to the Lexapro she's been taking for the past year for anxiety disorder. Now she intends to taper off because it gives her insomnia, restless legs and weight gain. I don't blame her but I'm wondering how that will impact her behavior and school work. She and her boyfriend are staying with us on winter break since Dec. 13 and have been fighting a lot. A few weeks ago she hurled a pitcher of water at me and broke a window. I can't wait until she leaves for Blacksburg about a week from now, but at the same time I'm worried that her boyfriend is going to (justifiably) dump her.

Needless to say, her issues are making life especially hard for us since my husband and I are both out of work and extremely stressed out ourselves.

I wonder if her astrological chart might provide insight and possibly hope for the future. She was born October 23, 1986 at 3:38 am in New Brunswick, NJ. My husband and other daughter are Libras and I'm a Pisces.

Would any of you astrology experts be able to check her chart and see if there's anything we can do? Or see if there's a future time when she might get her act together?

Blessings and thanks.

[I Have A Dream]

1. I can't read it LiberalEsto, but I'll post it so that anyone else who...

can has access to the chart:





Here's the chart with the current transits:

[LiberalEsto]

4. How did you do that so quickly?

I'm amazed.

Thank you for this.

I know almost nothing about astrology but I do notice she has 3 planets in Sorpio and was born on the Libra/Scorpio cusp. Aren't Scorpios kind of intense and temperamental?

[I Have A Dream]

10. Once you do a few, it's really easy.

Once things slow down for me, I'll post exactly how to do them from astro.com for anyone who is interested.

You're welcome. I hope that you can get some answers.

Yes, Scorpios can be very intense. As to temperamental, I think that would depend upon what else is in their charts. Remember that they say that there are 3 kinds of Scorpios: the Scorpion, the Eagle and the Phoenix. They're all very different types of Scorpios. Personally, I think that each person who is born with strong Scorpio energy decides for him/herself which type he/she will be. (In my opinion, all 3 of these are in every person with strong Scorpio energy. It's just what part that the person allows to make the decisions that makes the person that particular type.)

Maybe your daughter will be able to pull her act together and transform herself from what seems to be a Scorpion to one of the other types. I believe that she has it in her to do so, but it definitely must be something that she chooses to do; nobody makes a Scorpio do anything without his/her consent.

I have strong Scorpio energy (ascendant, Moon and Neptune in Scorpio, and my chart ruler Mars is in the 8th house, which is Scorpio's house), so I understand Scorpio energy pretty well.

:hug:

[MorningGlow]

2. I'm not an astrologer, but...

Hi LE and :hug: --you're in a tough situation. I'm really sorry to hear that. I'm not an astrologer, but I just wanted to urge you to try to convince your daughter to be checked for other problems--anything of the hormonal and chemical nature. The anti-anxiety meds make sense, but she should investigate to find out whether there's any other underlying cause.

Sending light for the best outcome. Keep us posted, LE.

[LiberalEsto]

5. Thanks for the suggestion

I suspect you're onto something there, but she might not be willing to go. She's unpredictable. I'll suggest it, though.

I found a website yesterday called The Road Back and had her read their material about taking various supplements to ease the tapering-off from Lexapro. She agreed to try that so I sent away for a few things to get her started.

Meanwhile she's got a heavy cold or flu, so I just made her some chicken soup and urged her to try the neti pot I got her. I don't think much can be done until she gets over that.

[Sanity Claws]

11. I agree about the underlying medical problems

I also don't blame her not wanting to take the medication you mentioned. How about taking her to a practitioner of Traditional Chinese Medicine? Tell her that she won't have to worry about those kind of side effects from acupuncture and herbs.

[LiberalEsto]

24. I've suggested it in the past

and she's refused. Acupuncture helped me a lot with lower back problems.
Even if she were willing, we can't afford it because my husband lost his job a couple of weeks ago.

It's a very good suggestion, though. Thank you!

[Celebration]

3. well, I am getting that she is out of balance

Chakras, meridians, everything. That's pretty well to be expected of someone who throws pitchers full of water. I just used her astrological chart as a guide, and your other info. Usually I use pictures of people to test them. I don't know anything about astrology..........

I'd want her out of the house too. Look, I am going to pm you.

[Shallah Kali]

6. Only 1 planet + ascendent in Earth oh boy

She probably has a lot of difficulty grounding and staying focused on the present if it effects her the way my chart does me. I know little astrology as I am just barely starting to learn so won't say anything more on that.

Just one thing - if you have a piece of rose quartz slip it under her mattress what she is home. I used to do that to my older sis with the permanent PMS type bubbling cauldron of rage personality. She would tone down a couple of notches until she found it and come to shriek and cuss at me.

[Idylle Moon Dancer]

17. Maybe I should try that rose quartz trick on myself

having no planets and only the ascendant in earth.

I am such a space cadet sometimes,
so controlled by my emotions

[Shallah Kali]

33. rose quartz is to mellow the cranky, grounding calls for stones line onyx, hematite, black tourmalin

I have a bracelet that is all stones for the three lower chakras and it feels sooooooo good even more than my my all hematite bracelets. IT has pyrite, copper, citrine, tiger's eye, hematite, smokey quartz, a few beads of clear quartz to amplify and I can't remember the rest. I have 5 planets in Air and only 2 in Earth so I need all the help I can get!

[Why Syzygy]

7. Shallah's post

gave me an idea. Would she try meditation or yoga?

edit: Also, I think I suggested this in another thread a while back. It's great for people who "can't control" their emotions:
http://www.recovery-inc.org/

[Celebration]

8. outstanding idea re: yoga/meditation n/t

[Shallah Kali]

9. or tai chi or a harder martial art or just hitting a punching bag or pillow

if yoga and meditation is too much sitting still? my angry older sis went nuts when our dad talked her into trying accupuncture to help her PMS. Lying still for 45 minutes was like torture to her. I know holding still means lots of personal stuff rises up and some people can't or don't know how to deal with it at all. I know if I don't delve into it at some point it is still going to come out and bite me worse so I have learned to at least try to deal. :shrug:

[Why Syzygy]

12. As I've aged,

I've concluded that there would be a lot more health in the world if we all participated in a sport or other form of athletics (martial arts inc), meditate and keep a journal.

[LiberalEsto]

20. She has been doing yoga

Finding out about her interest in yoga was so unexpected and wonderful. She got a yoga CD somewhere this past fall and started using it. She says she likes it, and it helps her relax. However, she slacked off since the semester ended. I gave her 2 more yoga CDs for Yule, hoping she will get back into it when she goes back to college.

It was a wonderful idea on your part. Thank you very much!

I'll check the link you included. I think I've heard of it.

[midnight]

13. Liberal here is a hug. I'm a pisces too, and know how

hard it is to navigate when this horrible behavior is coming from your own child. I'm thinking when she and her boyfriend go back to school,and you have some distance, you and only you will have the best answer.

[MagickMuffin]

14. Check out my post on Pranic Healing

There are links to the website with schedules for free healing clinics. Maybe she could benefit from it.

I think she needs to get this under control so she doesn't do anyone serious harm, whether it is mental, emotional, or physical harm, she needs to get this taken care of immediately. It can be dealt with, without taking pharma drugs. But she needs the support of a healing before she goes cold turkey. This is just what I'm picking up on.

:hug:

[Digit]

15. I am truly sorry you have having these difficulties

Others have given some great suggestions, but the one question I had which bugged me was the question of residency.
Wouldn't she qualify as a resident after one year?

I know it is not a biggie considering the scope of your issues, but I just wondered.
It would cut down significantly on the cost.

I wish all the best for you and your family during these trying times.

[LiberalEsto]

27. I honestly don't know about residency

Her boyfriend is working on helping her qualify.

[arikara]

16. I'm thinking dietary changes could help

if she's eating lots of unnatural foods out of packages, fast food, diet sodas etc. Food allergies and sensitivities could be compounding or even causing the problem. What would do her good is lots of high quality fresh fruit and veggies, nothing with flour, milk or sugar and definitely nothing with aspartame or msg which are excitotoxins and addle the brain.

Flower essences would help with the volatility if you know anyone who does Bach flower remedies. In fact a few drops of Rescue Remedy would help you all to cope with the stress. LOVE and PEACE to you all.

[Why Syzygy]

18. You make excellent points.

Rescue Remedy should be implemented asap. Agreed.

I found out at C'mas that my youngest sister has FINALLY stopped drinking aspartame. She's had bladder cancer for 12 years. Her husband said weight is just dropping off her. She's never been heavy, but constantly battled her weight. I'm so glad she finally quit that crap.

I'm so glad you posted. .. I was reading another dream thread and thinking that it would be easier to comment on dreams if one knew what meds and foods the dreamer was using. :D

[LiberalEsto]

26. She does eat a lot of junk

but she also eats a lot of fresh fruit and salads. Unfortunately what she eats while at college is not within my ability to control. I will suggest she avoid artificial sweeteners and msg, though. I agree they are very bad.

Your suggestion is very good, because it's possible that she has some kind of sensitivity. She's definitely allergic to eggplant. My other daughter has a severe allergy to nuts and peanuts, and I have a number of pollen allergies and chemical sensitivities.

[arikara]

29. One thing I've noticed about allergies

and I haven't ever seen this mentioned much if at all, is that combinations of things can amplify the effects of the allergen. For example, my daughter has an allergy to cats which isn't too bad, just causes a bit of sniffles... unless she drinks coffee. The combination of cats and coffee would make her wheeze and she needed to use her asthma puffer. She's pretty much controlled the problem now by sticking to the type of diet I mentioned above and doesn't have problems unless she starts eating a bunch of junk.

Its also notable that the food sensitivities, for lack of a better word, can cause behavioural problems and my feeling is that its hormonal. My Mr is diabetic and is not good about watching his diet and bloodsugar and has the mood swings that go along with that. However the times that he has been on the diet, his moods and disposition level right out and he becomes a different person.

Good luck!

[Why Syzygy]

19. LE ..

You are heavy on my mind this morning. Please keep yourself safe no matter what else.

[Metta]

21. The word therapy comes to mind. All this lovely astrology is too far up Maslow's Hierarchy to

change her behavior dispite what insights you may get. That is, while it may provide understanding and put her behaviors in a greater context, it may not be concrete enough to provide many tips on dealing with how she acts out her symptoms.

[Cleita]

22. I wish I could help you but all I can do is sent you prayers and

light hoping that you see an end to this darkness in your life in the near future.

[I Have A Dream]

23. LiberalEsto, does your daughter regret things that she does...

after she does them? For example, after she threw the pitcher at you, was she upset with herself for having done this, or does she instead blame you for "making her do it because you got her so mad"?

If the former, I think that the problem is lack of control. If it's the latter, then I think that the problem's much more serious. I hope that it's the former. :hug:

[LiberalEsto]

25. Unfortunately it's the second.

[Why Syzygy]

28. Do you all have medical insurance? nt

[LiberalEsto]

30. Yes but it expires March 31

We're hoping that when my husband finds a job, it will come with health coverage.

[SheilaT]

31. She's 22 years old and

lives in another state. She's an adult. Treat her as such, tell her that certain behaviors are unacceptable, make sure she pays for the window repair. If you and your husband are out of work you have no obligation to pay her out of state tuition.

Yes, make use of the astrological insights and other suggestions offered here, but do not use astrology to let her off the hook about her behavior.

[juno jones]

32. She's got Saturn and Uranus on the IC

(the cross line that goes to the 'south' of the chart between the third and fourth houses). The IC is inner stuff as oppsed to the more public midheaven.

She has a good tug of war going between the urge to act sponaneously (irrationally) and remaining grounded. Saturn traditionally was a maleific though and could point to depression...the Uranus/Saturn swings could resemble bi-polar episodes, even if that is not the medical case.

Two things. She's had Pluto (and the other large planets BTW)crossing almost her entire planetary array since she was born. Most people only have a planet or two affected by Pluto in their entire lives. Pluto transits are intense enough for adults, all familiar moorings are stripped away, I cannot imagine being a child and thinking such feelings were normal as in 'is that all there is?'. Within the next couple of years, Pluto will disengage with her natal neptune (the drugs she has been taking? They have been in close conjuction for about a year.) and will be leaving direct conjunction with any planets in her chart, which should bring some relief. Perhaps she could try another drug. Or perhaps, if she's beginning to acknowledge that she has a problem, perhaps try long term changes in diet and lifestyle. Pluto in Cap will be supportive of that.

She also has jupiter in a good location on her descendant where it is influencing her relationships with partners. She might not hang on to this boyfriend, Uranus is in the seventh house or relationship right now, but she has a darn good chance of having quality relationships in the future.

At least that's what I get right off the bat. The good news is she's moving into a far less heavy time energy-wise, there is room to hope. Keep an eye on her, tho, as her Saturn return comes around (age 28-30), as she has so many other planets in that area. Saturn is best used as a wake-up dose of reality and is a good time to be responsible and building a strong foundation. If not correctly utilized it can signify depression. A Saturn return is a huge milestone marking the beginning of true adult maturity.

Caveat: I'm no professional. If you are truly interested, and I think this might be good time for a reading, not just for your daughter, but probably for yourself as well, there are some very cool astrologers out there. You can either look locally or I recommend my friends online, Neith and Pat at Real Astrologers:

http://realastrologers.com/

I've been chatting with these ladies via blog for several years now and I'm impressed by their knowledge and integrity.

I wish you luck. I come from a similar family where all the daughters were so very different. I cannot speak to my youngest sister because her personality is so similar to what you've described. I cannot imagine what it would be like if my son had inheirited a similar personality. Please take care of yourself as well...
:hug:

PS: Her sun is 29 Libra. She is a Libra not a scorp. Just on the cusp is all.

PPS: How is her relationship to her sibling? Her chart shows, love (venus), communication(mercury), and stability(saturn). If she has good rapport with her sister, perhaps her sister could be helpful in bringing up tricky subjects and offering advice.