So. Um. Okay. Um. I....need your input.

[lildreamer316]

What I'm going to post may (read:WILL!!) sound definitely crazy. It will sound like we are possibly trying to find an esoteric answer to a psychological problem. I want you to know UP FRONT that we are looking into those possibilities very strongly as well as the one I am going to talk about. Please, please do not think we are not getting the help we need in some form or way. I need to discuss this with someone and you all are the most open and loving people I know. We also are searching for someone local to help and I have already found two good candidates, both very intuitive and non-judgmental.
So, here goes.

Husband miraculously had the weekend off and we spend all of Friday and Saturday here together. Wonderful time for us to decompress and absorb what happened last weekend. We talked and talked. And came to a startling revelation: We believe he may be psychic.
Or empathic, whathaveyou.

Part of husband's story is here(post#5): http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=245x37967
Of course there is a lot more than that to what he has done and been through.

He finally opened up more to me and was able to describe both of what he "sees" on a daily basis and what happens to him during the times he is drinking. This is where it gets really interesting.

He was trying to tell me what he was seeing in his brain that is so distracting to him that he acts as if he has ADD. He said it is like a movie that plays in front of his inner eye. Most of the times he says it is so real he thinks he is there in the scene-it involves ALL of his senses. When he said this, I immediately thought of the Oprah show I had just DVR'd where she has John Edward and Allison Dubois on. I started to play it. When John tells Oprah that when he "sees", he says it is "kind of like having a daydream-you know when you are daydreaming, and it's a very very real experience? That's what it's like, except that I'm conscious when I'm daydreaming."--my husband almost jumped of the couch in excitement. He said that is EXACTLY what happens to him all the time; every day. This has become a problem for him because when this happens he loses time; even if only for a few seconds. It happens when he is working and when he is driving. It is a miracle that he has not had a extremely debilitating crash because of it, but I believe his guides are looking out for him.

The other reason this has become a problem is because he feels whatever feelings are associated with these visions very (VERY)strongly. He is worried because he often feels depressed and sometimes angry (although not very often with the anger). It happens so often it becomes painful for him. This is where the alcohol comes in-he says he has a few drinks because it stops some of the 'visions' and deadens the pain.

HOWever-
THEN comes the really BIG problem, some of which I described above. After a certain point in the drinking, he seems to turn into another person. A very angry and abusive person, someone who plays very devious psychological games. This tends to only be directed at me, but I believe it could spread to others. We have been over and over this. What was always so strange about these times was that after he goes to sleep or passes out, he would wake up as himself, and have absolutely NO MEMORY of any of the things he said or did. He would see broken things around the house, and evidence that we had been in physical contact; and wonder what had happened. He says it is if the alcohol has shut the part of him that is 'him' completely off. His memory stops at a certain point after a number of drinks, and does not return until he is sober. He says this did not used to happen to him; it is a fairly recent development.

At first I put this down to a chemical reaction with the alcohol, and possibly a psychotic break because of his childhood trauma. He has seen a few people to discuss this before. Nothing has really come of it and medication has not helped. Could this be someone else, literally?

As a side note; he says he is also able to turn part of himself "off" when he is playing chess; and literally play himself as someone else would. In this way he says he truly plays both sides of the board. I hope that makes some sense.

Of course this could all be a medical condition, but we would like to explore other options also. When we apply the theory that he has some sort of gift like John Edward described -clairsentient, clariaudient and clairvoyant; it seems to answer more of the questions and problems than anything else.

He says he has forgiven those in his past who have hurt him. He says he actually loves them on a soul level and understands that he was there to learn and teach lessons. He is upset with them when he thinks they have not learned the lessons they are here for. He said today that if he had falsely forgiven them, he would not feel about them as he does(see below). But he still (at the moment)feels unexplained pain. We have theorized that the pain/depression he is feeling is coming from others that he is psychically open to. The problem comes when he is unable to pinpoint where these feelings are coming from, and more importantly, WHY he is having them. This is the point we were trying to get to-was there some buried huge problem that was causing this mass of pain and depression, or is it originating from outside of himself?

Another side note; please refer to the post I mentioned above about how he is able to read a room as a dj so well that he plays exactly what the crowd wants to hear.

He just found out that his mother says she has "visions" sometimes also. She never talked to him about this until now. Hmmmm.

This whole thing is exciting but confusing and also scary in that maybe we are just completely deluding ourselves into thinking he has some kind of gift when really he is just very sick. It's just-I don't think I am wrong in the way that I am seeing him-as a very loving and potentially powerful person in many ways. I understand that love is blind; I am trying to make sure my eyes are as open as I can get them. He is tired of trying to figure out what is "wrong" with him and why he feels so different.

Oh, and yes, as I mentioned in the other post, he meets almost EVERY single requirement there is for an Indigo.

Ideas? Support? Input? Constructive criticism? (please don't be too harsh..)

[NMDemDist2]

1. wow

the first thing that popped to mind was he needs to learn some heavy duty grounding techniques so the 'other's' energy can't impact him

does he meditate with his guides? he needs to start and get some protection from them. maybe he can start visualization techniques to enclose himself into a blue protective bubble

good luck lildream :hug:

[cassiepriam]

2. OK

I think that there is quite a bit going on with your husband. It is not unusual for psychics to medicate with drugs and alcohol. (The reasons for this are complex, I will not go into all of them.)

The problem is that alcohol is a very addictive drug and it causes a physical dependency. It is also a strong brain toxin which begins to cause damage to the neurons.

In certain stages of alcoholism there are blackouts which are just as you describe, the memory loss etc. There can also be intermittent rage disorder.

In addition people who were abused as children can have PTSD and do some flashbacks etc. And have some cahracterlogical impairment. And some brief psychotic like episodes. I would like to add that I believe that most abused children are more psychic than non abused children for a number of reaons.

The first thing is that your husband must get a competent alcohol and drug evaluation. He must dry out under supervision or he could have DTs. He needs to get clean and sober. At this point it is hard to tell what is going on. He must have competent medical and psychological interventions.

Once he is sober you can begin to explore his psychic abilities. Hopefully you can find a therapist who is supportive in this area. Help him deal with what may be a significant gift that is frightening him.

But right now it would be hard to explore that if he is still drinking.
So first things first. Get the medical help, then when he is ready, he can go work on the psychic end of things.

I wish you both good luck and hang in there. This is a very good first step.

[rumpel]

5. I agree

alcohol needs to be addressed - alcohol also destroys his special talents

meanwhile you may assist him in boosting his self image and confidence

[DemExpat]

3. My input on this, lildreamer....

from someone with a lifetime of mental health problems fairly well worked through and out at this stage of my life.

My impression of your story and description of your hubby is that even if he does have psychic/empath powers, his inability to ground himself well prevents him from being able to focus, dose them, and use them well.

The ADD behavior, the childhood abuse history, the extreme sensitivity and keen insight into others' behaviors, but especially the drinking and anger towards you when under the influence give me the strong feeling that he needs now to address this psychologically as a first step in developing his potential gift and power.

I was very fortunate in my 20s to have a psychiatrist to work with for several years who was very open to possible past life influences and soul astrology, so I was able with her to process the pain of my past in the light of psychology and esoteric issues.

I must say that my husband's drinking problem has also brought a heck of a lot of stress to our years together, and, after several years of serious ultimatums (setting limits to what I will accept from him!) thrown his way, he has been doing very well not medicating himself with this substance now for over a year now. Now the problems we still have are communication problems and don't have the additional messing up from alcohol, if you know what I mean.....

Maybe encourage him to seek a good counsellor or therapist to work with on his drinking and unrest in his head - to process his childhood experiences more thoroughly and to be able to recognize what effect they may still be having on him now - and THEN he can start being better able to discern what feelings, voices, ideas, and images are coming to his open mind and spirit - from within and outside.

Good therapy/counseling brings clarity (if not relief) and I have chosen not to drug myself as I did in my youth because I can process it all so much better.

:hug:

DemEx

[rumpel]

4. some time ago there was

a documentary - I think we had a thread here. It is a supportive group for children with abilities - they nourish to expand on their gifts.

I agree, meditation and other activities may benefit

Maybe there is a support group?

I only googled this - maybe you find something that resonates
http://www.namastecafe.com/evolution/indigo/links.htm

[Coyote_Bandit]

6. I want to echo

what Cassie has said about PTSD.

Forty some years ago my younger sister died in an auto accident. I was four years old at the time. The accident happened at a time when my family was moving from the city to a remote rural area. At the time PTSD was thought of as being combat related. While I was encouraged to talk about what had occurred I did not receive any formal counseling at the time. I had a number of spiritual experiences for a period of time following the accident. I had a lot of deja vu kind of experiences - and can vividly remember my mother trying to explain the concept of deja vu to me at the time. I saw angels. I saw and talked to my sister. I figured out these kinds of things were not "normal" and I completely quit talking about my sister and the events that had occurred. I didn't talk about it again until I was in college. Avoidance is one symptom of PTSD. So is being emotionally detached or numb - something that is often assisted through the use of alcohol or drugs. So are intrusive memories, triggering circumstances or events. So is the sense of always being on guard - which is why PTSD is considered an anxiety disorder. Dissociation is often associated with PTSD. I am fortunate. While I probably never met the diagnostic criteria for PTSD I definitely did have at least some of the symptoms - and I utilized many of the classic coping mechanisms.

lildreamer, I recognize many of the symptoms of PTSD in your description of your hubby - and much of my own experience. The alcohol abuse is not the root issue - it is a symptom of something else. It will numb him emotionally and it will numb and scatter any spiritual gifting he has.

:hug: