Have you or someone you know ever been outed?

[Dark]

I don't mean whether you are out. But whether someone else forced you or a person you know out of the closet.

[expatriot]

1. at first I read your post as "..ever been quoted?" lol n/t

[Maestro]

2. Yeah

In high school I had a good friend, whom I had no idea was gay, outed when someone saw him in a restaurant being intimate with his boyfriend. The restaurant was far from our hometown so the odds of someone from my town seeing him were pretty slim. Anyhow, that explained why I never saw his out of town "grilfriend."

[murray hill farm]

3. No...but i did know a woman who..

lived in a small city in Wisconsin, who came out on a local radio station where she was being interviewed on an unrelated subject. The problem being, that her two teen aged kids..were in school listening with their class to the radio program. The probably knew that their mom was a lesbian, but she did not tell them she was going to do this..so insensitive of her..i really disliked her from that point on.

[Dark]

12. Poor kids.

That had to be fun.

'Our mom's gonna be on the radio today!'

[davidinalameda]

20. how dare she

how horrible

WTF?

and how was it insensitive of her?

[MuseRider]

4. Yes, someone very close to me

and it was unpleasant and unfortunate and it sealed his fate in many ways. That is the main reason I don't think anyone should be outed, even if they are a hypocrite. It should be personal choice. JMNSHO

Edited for spelling

[elehhhhna]

5. A Boss who outed himself on an airplane canoodling with a male employee:

Knowing full well that another emloyee--a gossipy blabermouth, yet!--was 4 rows behind them.

Said boss was a married father of 5. He'd had lots to drink.

[dsc]

6. I have met two down here who were

Both got thrown out of their churches after they got outed at them. I was outed on one job by a mouthy coworker.

[Dark]

13. Jesus' love in action. . .

That's why I don't talk about my love life, or lack of one, at work. I have to climb back into my closet for four hours every day. And then when I'm with the family it's worse.

They're fundamentalists.

[Misunderestimator]

7. Well, an ex-girlfriend of mine was outed to her mom by my ex-girlfriend

at the time. Not really an outing, in the public sense, but it was pretty traumatic.

People have tried to out me in the past, but I've never hidden anything, so not much effect there.

[Dark]

14. Why do some people try to use it as a weapon? n/t

[blogactive]

24. Weapon...

The reason outing is used as a weapon by my site is that the very people outed are those who are both gay AND responsible for anti-gay work.

Simply put, no one has the right to secretly be a member of a group they are actively legislating against.

Ken Mehlman and George Bush made sexual orientation a weapon in politics and now they want us to stop using it. Ha.

www.blogactive.com
Saving America, one busted closet at a time

[BR_Parkway]

8. My partner outed himself to his folks when he called me honey

not exactly the way he'd planned on handling it.

[Stepup2]

9. Yeah

My sister was married to a real loser for a short time and he outed me to my father. It was tough, but we got thru it. My partner was outed while in college. He folks threw her out of the house and they have been raging assholes to her since.

[bigwillq]

10. This probably doesn't count but

one of my friends found out I was gay after I had been talking to him on another friend's cell phone and I guess I didn't hang up the phone right and then the group I was with started talking about "hot guys".

He called me later that night. He was cool with it.


That's about the closest I've come to being "outed"

[Dark]

15. At least he was cool with it. n/t

[arcos]

11. Yep, on an email group where several of my professors were members...

It was kind of awkward because just a few weeks earlier one of them had very kind words for my comments. I was discussing in vitro fertilization with an opus dei idiot, and she traced my emails to the gaycostarica.com domain, where sometimes I used their smtp server (they offered free accounts)... she then proceeded to announce to everyone that I was gay, and that there was a hidden "gay agenda", etc...

The silver lining is that the moderator warned her that she was out of line, and an overwhelming majority of the people agreed.

:grr:

[Dark]

16. What a bitch. n/t

[Sapphocrat]

17. Lots, including me...

Despite being out to everyone I met for most of my life, I wasn't quite ready to be outed in a major metropolitan newspaper, for the simple worry that such a public outing might cause my mother some discomfort (since all her extreme-right-repuke family reads said paper) -- but she didn't give a damn, and was so proud of me, I was quite happy about it:

In fact, Rogers is something of an anomaly. "Really, if you want to talk Poseidon Adventure fans, I don't know any other lesbians out there who are obsessed about this film..."

If you want to read the whole piece (only for the curious, the queer, and the Poseidon Adventure-addicted), PM me for links to the full article.

[swimmernsecretsea]

18. By an ex-roommate who considered herself enlightened

but was really a "gossip." She'd known me for years, and when her boyfriend and I started sharing an apartment, she found out, of course. Her boyfriend didn't care at all, but knew how I felt about people knowing. She immediately got on the phone, grabbed friends' aside, etc., and told them. I was still closeted at the time, with no family members and only a small circle of friends aware of my sexuality, so I was rather pissed off at her, and had a talk with her.

I'm not at all closeted anymore. I think of what she did as being indescreet, and am not as bothered by it anymore. It made me realize how little it mattered that people knew. Those who found out who dropped me as a friend didn't matter that much anyway.

[Langley85]

19. Sort Of

I came out to a friend who I thought could keep her mouth shut, but before long there were rumors floating around school about me, and some people I thought of as friends would stand in the corner talking about me and move away whenever I wandered near them. A guy I thought I was good friends with tried to get me uninvited to the senior party because he was afraid he'd pass out drunk and I'd do something to him while he was unconscious, ugh. It hurt at the time, but I'm over it, they're just ignorant and the friends who stuck with me are the ones who count anyway.

[davidinalameda]

21. yes

one of my sisters outed me to my parents

not pretty

[sans qualia]

22. Yes, several times

Honestly, what did they think would happen when they put me in a room with two (very heterosexual) guys? Oy. And somehow someone I went to high school with found out about me, and told her little brother, who outed me to a bunch of my sister's friends. She was none too happy about that.

That said, being outed has never caused me any problems, since most of the important people in my life already know, and word of my, um, past hasn't spread that far.

[6000eliot]

23. My governor outed himself.