When everyone pushes on the wedge

[Bad Thoughts]

A woman I know is going through a rough time. The father of her child (they never married) has for years cooked up insane schemes and ideas to win custody from her. He brings her to family court to review (what seems to be) the most minute parental decisions. Even the decision to breast feed up to the 18th month was called into question, and she had to submit to reviews from pediatricians and psychologists. Her bank account was constantly drained from these legal affairs. Finally, the father figured out a way to win custody. The company the mother works for had to leave the state. The child, fearing the loss of friends (and a new love interest), expressed doubt about leaving. The father trotted the mother into court. She was subjected to numerous interviews by therapists and work counselors, who had the gall to ask why she did not accept unemployment in order to stay in the state. Finally, the father won custody. The child still went to a different school district, in state but still far enough from old friends that they are never seen. Moreover, the child fell in love with the new home, but has no means of changing the situation.

This is but one example, but I think that some fathers are driven to such extremes these days, aggressively attacking the custodial rights of mothers.

Then there is Joseph Reyes. He made decisions about his child that were not his to make. They not only contradicted his estranged wife's custodial rights, but also the decisions they had made about raising the child when they were married. The only difference I see is that Reyes has framed his battle over custody with religion. Baptizing the child against the mother's wishes and calling on the media to witness going to church against court orders, Reyes has used a wedge issue--the legitimacy of Christianity in public life--to make his custody battle and political issue. Indeed, almost every http://news.google.com/news/more?pz=1&cf=all&ned=us&cf=all&ncl=dh7KzZcj8ZGWYzMXiYFC_Oi23BzfM>article and blog, in their title, describes this as an issue over religion and religious freedom: that Reyes will go to jail for taking child to church. No, he may be penalized for violating a restraining order.

I know some on this forum will immediately decry "indoctrination" of children into religion. But I would hope that everyone would at least see this battle for what it is.

[whyverne]

1. Interesting.

I remember running to my lawyer during the divorce crying, "She's accusing me of child abuse!". He said "Don't worry about it, they all do that. Judges don't fall for it anymore". Anymore?

Then during the custody battle, the lawyer told me that I had to take the petition to Family Court. She said normally I could just go in myself but she'd go with me because she thought that fathers were not treated fairly there.

I won, btw.

Of course I'm stating this in full knowledge that I might be violating DU's unstated policy of "Men bad, women good". HeeHee.