How to fight back when the Bible is used as a weapon

[housewolf]

From DailyKos

How to fight back when the Bible is used as a weapon

Being a gay Jewish woman, I know a little something about being attacked by "Christians" wielding the Bible as a club.

The good news is that people who do this, like all Republican tricksters (because they almost always are) are banking on ignorance.

The vast majority of people in this great country of ours, have not read the Bible, let alone cover-to-cover; and, a good deal of people who claim to be Christian do not know what their religion is supposed to be.

The better news is that the Truth is on our side. Let's begin.

<snip>

Here are some quaint little verses to toss at people throwing verses at you...
Lev 19:18
Mat 5:44-7
Mat 7:1
Rom 3:10

There are literally thousands of verses to tell the person quoting verses at you to go away.

<snip>

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2005/3/1/145524/9044

[RobertSeattle]

1. My personal favorite...

www.godhatesshrimp.com

I chuckle ever time I go to that sight.

Most bible thumpers are quite selective in their verse selections.

[no_hypocrisy]

3. You have a good point. Fundies don't keep a "kosher kitchen",

and have lines out the door at Red Lobster during Lobsterfest or All You Can Eat Shrimp month. Not to mention pig roasts and ribs, ribs, ribs.

[MemphisTiger]

6. I think they also perverse the context of the verses

I personally believe that the Bible is the word of God, BUT you have to take each verse in it's context. That is where these right wingers screw up, which is blasphemy.

[Nothing Without Hope]

2. Here is my favorite version of the famous "Open Letter to Dr. Laura"

The version at this site includes both information on the actual originator of the Letter (J. Kent Ashcraft), whom the site owner identified through some admirable sleuthing, as well as the actual texts of the biblical verses cited, in two different translations! A true treasure.

Here is the site:
http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~susan/joke/laura.htm

My personal favorite is (d):
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

Yes, the fundies certainly cherry-pick isolated, context-free "Biblical quotations" to "prove" that their bigotry has God's approval. Let's show them up for the hatemongering fools and hypocrites they are.

[Modem Butterfly]

4. It's your hell. You go there.

The Bible, like other religious texts, has no meaning and no affect on my life. I've certainly had fundies rail at me with Bible verses. I just ignore them and continue on my merry way. It seems to really piss some people off that other people don't believe as they believe and are happy in their lives anyway.

[zanana]

5. I just tell them I don't believe that the Bible is the word of God.

That really pisses them off, but it's true.

[Democrat Dragon]

7. Just tell them that

they are commiting blasphemy, and that is anti-american. Whenever they try to use the Bible to promote war and lynching gays, just tell them that Jesus promotes peace and tolerance and what they are doing is "anti-American" and anti-christian.

then watch as they throw a tantrum. :)

[MissMarple]

8. I especially liked this little paragraph.

"But the bigger issue is that the people who preach hate in the name of God, especially the ones who claim to be Christian, are not Christian. They are anti-Christian, and their god, of course, is the anti-Christ. That right there should be enough to get the vast majority of people who think that they're Christian to wake up and smell the coffee."

[muriel_volestrangler]

9. Pray you have some fresh fruit?

Sgt.:
We haven't done them, have we? Right. Bananas. How to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana. Now you, come at me with this banana. Catch! Now, it's quite simple to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana. First of all you force him to drop the banana; then, second, you eat the banana, thus disarming him. You have now rendered him 'elpless.

Palin:
Suppose he's got a bunch.

Sgt.:
Shut up.

Idle:
Suppose he's got a pointed stick.

Sgt.:
Shut up. Right now you, Mr Apricot.

Chapman:
'Arrison.

Sgt.:
Sorry, Mr. 'Arrison. Come at me with that banana. Hold it like that, that's it. Now attack me with it. Come on! Come on! Come at me! Come at me then! (Shoots him.)

Chapman:
Aaagh! (dies.)

Sgt.:
Now, I eat the banana. (Does so.)

Palin:
You shot him!

Jones:
He's dead!

Idle:
He's completely dead!

Sgt.:
I have now eaten the banana. The deceased, Mr Apricot, is now 'elpless.

Palin:
You shot him. You shot him dead.

Sgt.:
Well, he was attacking me with a banana.

Jones:
But you told him to.

Sgt.:
Look, I'm only doing me job. I have to show you how to defend yourselves against fresh fruit.

Idle:
And pointed sticks.

Sgt.:
Shut up.

Palin:
Suppose I'm attacked by a man with a banana and I haven't got a gun?

Sgt.:
Run for it.

http://www.jumpstation.ca/recroom/comedy/python/banana.html

[DoYouEverWonder]

10. Here's how I fight back

I give them one of my little 'holy cards'.