Damn Bank would not give me a loan!!!!

[KansasVoter]

I walked in and said I wanted a $50,000 loan. They asked me what I was going to do with it. I said 'It is none of your business' and they refused to lend me the money. Something does not seem fair here!!!

[nichomachus]

1. You should have told them you were going to buy a private jet n/t

[AtomTan]

2. Call your Congressman. I understand they can make these things happen.

[Shiver]

4. For $50,000?

Cheap-ass private jet...

[nichomachus]

7. I didn't say

it was a good private jet.

[Shiver]

14. Sounds like a solid investment then

Why wouldn't the banks back that up?

[ejpoeta]

10. maybe it was a repo. :)

[nichomachus]

16. Or maybe you bought from Sarah Palin on eBay

[lurky]

3. Say you blew all your cash on "toxic assets"

and you can't pay your bills. How can they argue with that? :shrug:

[Shiver]

5. Were you wearing pants?

I've found most bank people won't talk to you if you're not wearing pants, let alone give you any money.

[nichomachus]

9. I don't know about that

My cousin Lucille never wore pants when she went to the bank. She found that if she sat just right, the loan officer was very cooperative.

[Shiver]

13. It only works for me if I get the female tellers or that one slightly creepy guy.

Unfortunately, I usually make it to the bank only when Gerald is on duty...

[DeepBlueC]

6. You should have asked for a "bailout" not a"loan"

Loans, like taxes, are for little people, to paraphrase Leona Helmsley.

[ejpoeta]

8. tell them you just want to borrow some of YOUR money.

some of YOUR tax dollars. i don't understand why they wanted to know what you were going to do with the money anyway!! geesh.

[avaistheone1]

11. You should have asked for $50 Billion, not $50,000.

There lies your problem.

Congress can not relate to such a small bailout. :spank:

[baldguy]

12. $50,000? Well there's your problem right there.

Ask for $50,000,000. And tell them you need it to build a summer water park in Antarctica - this'll be the first installment of many loans.

[nichomachus]

15. You joke, but

a few years ago, a guy walked into a big Boston bank. He tap danced and bullshit them for a couple of hours and they lent him a ton of money. I want to say $20 million -- but it was HUGE. Then, he kind of disappeared. They were really unclear on what he wanted the money for, but because he was wearing an expensive suit, a power tie, and a Rolex, they gave him the money.

[CitizenPatriot]

17. Did you ask for an earmark?

I hear if you wink while wearing a really tight skirt and red heels, they'll give you money for a bridge to nowhere -- and you don't have to really build the bridge!!!

Easy money!

[AtomicKitten]

18. Those bastards!

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

19. Reminds me of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoEBAgy3t3U&feature=PlayList&p=AE2F389C4C921270&playnext=1&index=46

[cottonseed]

20. Tell them you're too big to fail.