Failure to Blow Election Stuns Democrats

[BurtWorm]

http://www.borowitzreport.com/article.aspx?ID=6957

Party Faithful Mourn End to Losing Tradition

Just minutes after their party's longstanding losing tradition lay in tatters on the ground, millions of shell-shocked Democrats stared at their television screens in disbelief, asking themselves what went right.

For Democrats, who have become accustomed to their party blowing an election even when it seemed like a sure thing, Tuesday night's results were a bitter pill to swallow.

The head-shaking and finger-pointing over the demise of the Democrats' losing streak, which many of the party faithful had worn like a badge of honor, reached all the way to the upper echelons of the Democratic National Committee.

"Believe me, I'm as shocked by these results as anybody," said DNC chief Howard Dean, who indicated he has received hundreds of calls from incredulous party members. "We did everything in our power to screw this thing up."

Dean pointed to several key elements the Democrats put in place to ensure defeat, ranging from "a rancorous primary campaign" to "the appointment of me."

"Somehow, despite our best efforts to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory, we won," he said. "I came in here with a mandate to blow this thing and I didn't get it done."


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[QueenOfCalifornia]

1. Ha!

Yep... I had set myself up for the big possibility for defeat. I kept hoping I was wrong. I had to keep pinching myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming. :)

[Alter Ego]

2. Hahaha that could not be more true.

[BOSSHOG]

3. Failure to steal election disappoints conservative base

[Blu Dahlia]

4. funny! I'm still stunned!

[Peace Patriot]

5. LOL!

:rofl:

[Maven]

6. The new paradigm

DEMS: Organized, winners.

REPUKES: Divided, losers.