"I can't imagine a President of the United States bein' named 'President McCain'"

[Bippity Boo]

"The Bible says Cain was a murderer. That should bother everybody. I checked and couldn't find the name O-bama in the Bible doin' anything wrong, so I guess he's OK. God will watch over him."

[olkaz]

1. Source?

Why do I have to ask?

[Bippity Boo]

2. at your service

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=385&topic_id=220134&mesg_id=220134

[SpiralHawk]

3. If Cain and Abel were the sons of Adam and Eve, the first man and woman...

Then who the Holy Hockeystick did Cain and Abel marry? Aliens from another planet?

I mean, the Bible tells us there were no other people. So who did they marry?

Answer me that, republicon-homelander candidates Mr. McCain and Ms. Palin Horse?

[dmallind]

4. Well in one case at least

a woman from the land of Nod.

Where the hell that woman came from, or where the buggery Nod is and how it got populated, is never explained.

[Bippity Boo]

6. Sarah Palin can see the Land of Nod from her house... nt

[SpiralHawk]

7. Ahhh, this must be the Biblical Parallel Universe doctrine

I thought there were NO PEOPLE at all, until Adam & Eve popped up, mated, and gave us Cain & Abel.

But now we learn there was a parallel universe of NOD back in that era. Were there also parallel universes of Wynken and Blynken? Or just Nod?

I hope a Biblical Scholar can straighten this out, before the Spawn of Cain take over the U.S. of A and subjects the good citizens of this Fair Land to more years of Republicon Homelander FAIL & corruption.

[dmallind]

9. Well really they already have.

For my sins (pun intended) I spend a fair amount of time discussing thjings like this with biblical inerrantists and so on.

The general consensus is to point to the extreme age possible for people back then (Adam was 930 when he died IIRC), assume that this meant an equally prolonged fertility, and therefore that Eve had the time to populate a land of Nod before Cain and Abel got round to getting married.

Yes that means incest but it's godly incest so it's OK

[SpiralHawk]

10. Okay, I got it. According to the republicon version of the Bible, Godly Incest is cool

...must head off to fast in the wilderness to contemplate these republicon revelations...

[Sebastian Doyle]

11. Actually the very same Bible chapter that right wingers use to condemn the gays

Genesis 19, aka the "Sodom & Gomorrah" story, ends with Lot (nephew of Abraham) running away from Sodom Ground Zero with his two daughters to live up in the hills, and since their boyfriends got nuked in the disaster (even though they weren't even gay)the girls decide they're gonna get dear old daddy Lot drunk and do him.

So gay = bad, incest = good. At least according to fundie interpretation of Genesis 19.

[SpiralHawk]

12. "Whatever floats their boat." - Republicon Incestivites

[jberryhill]

8. I thought everyone found their wife in the land of Nod

No?

[tuvor]

5. McCain Unable.