Just for fun: John McCain concession speech contest....

[steve2470]

In one or two paragraphs, write John McCain's concession speech. Funny pictures give you extra credit :)

[Cooley Hurd]

1. "I just called Senator Obama and told him..."

"...FUCK YOU! I'm the BOSS NOW! Diebold told me so! Um, who are the men with the butterfly net?"

[daninthemoon]

2. I only know the first line: "My Friends..."

[1corona4u]

9. LOL, of course...

[okieinpain]

3. uh, you guy's really need to stop this. this is not the time to tempt

fate.

[frickaline]

4. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE! YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED!

[Lucky 13]

5. He'll try to get out of THAT too.

Graciousness is not in his repertoire.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

6. Grampa Simpson already wrote it.

"Big deal! When I was a pup, we got spanked by presidents 'til the cows came home! Grover Cleveland spanked me on two non-consecutive occasions!"

[TechBear_Seattle]

7. I'm game. Here is what I see....

"I am proud, and humbled, by the choice of the American people for the next President of the United States. Tonight begins a new era of bipartisan cooperation, a new era of progress away from failed policies and towards a renewal of what this great country is all about. Tonight begins real, meaningful change, and I thank you for your support and ....

"Wait, you mean I didn't win? #$%*@+@&, you stupid piece of ^#$*! Why didn't any one tell me? Because you thought it would be FUNNY to see me make an $*# &%#^^ of myself on national television?"

[1corona4u]

8. My Friends..

The fundamentals of my campaign are strong, but apparently Obama's campaign fundamentals are stronger. The fundamental differences between myself and Obama are fundamental. But, fundamentals are not always fundamental. Fundamentals are important, but fundamentally speaking, they aren't.

It is at this time, that I fundamentally put my fundamentals aside.

:-)

[RedLetterRev]

13. Putting the "mental" in fundamentalism LOL n/t

[blondeatlast]

10. "Thank God that's over. Now I can divorce Cindy. Welcome the new Mrs. McCain, Vicki Iseman!

God, how I fucking HATE Budweiser!"

[dmallind]

11. OK

My friends I stand before you grateful for your support and trusting in your decision as I always trusted the American people, even in those five and a half years when I was an enforced guest of the Vietnamese people.

I trust that you will be happy with the president you have chosen and I wish you well. I hope that he serves you in a way that is worthy of that trust, even as I tried to be worthy of it in those five and a half years when I couldn't serve you at all.

I consider it a significant and historic day that Americans have finally been able to see beyond race, inexperience and partisanship. It is a sign of our rugged independent individualism as a nation that you did not vote for me out of pride in my service or sympathy for my five and a half years as a POW - and I would never have dreamt of trying to leverage that sympathy by bringing up my five and a half years away from you because I respect you too much my friends. I respect the choice you have made and I will now spend my remaining years away from public service, just as I did those probably greater number of years I was a prisoner of war. I wish president elect Barack Hussein Osama the best, and I have had my intern call him to say so. May you spend the next four years better than I spent those years in Hanoi. Good luck, and God bless you all my friends!

[WeDidIt]

12. He won't concede

He'll play B-1 Bob Dornan for the rest of his life.

[ITsec]

14. Short and sweet. Fuck it.... I quit. n/t

[steve2470]

15. LOL true to form to the very end nt