If Palin gets foreign policy experience by seeing Russia from Alaska, what about you guys?

[eshfemme]

I was watching a Larry King panel with Paul Begala and Stephanie Miller who both respectively had these retorts to that absurd absurd claim on Palin's behalf that is made by McCain surrogates: "I see the moon outside of my window, that doesn't make me a astrophysicist." and "I saw the ocean driving along the highway but I'm not a marine biologist."

So I wondered, what else are good snarky retorts to that ridiculous line, "I can see Russia from Alaska! (so I have foreign policy experience)" So please state the most inane thing that would qualify you guys for ridiculously highly skilled jobs a la Palin.

I'll start:

I pass by the hospital whenever I walk to the store, that means I have medical experience and I can be a doctor!

EDIT: Just thought of a few more:

I collected foreign currency and stamps as a kid, that qualifies me to be President of the World Bank and/or Postmaster General of the United States Post Office.

I've visited the Japanese embassy in NYC, that qualifies me to be the ambassador for Japan (along with full diplomatic protection, yay!)

I've played strategy games before, that qualifies me to be the leader of CENTCOM.

[tblue]

1. I think a lot. Can I be a brain surgeon?

[BOSSHOG]

2. I drink lots of beer in New Orleans

so I can be Ambassador to Louisiana.

My neighbor is in the Mississippi National Guard so I can be Secretary of Defense.

[no_hypocrisy]

3. I toured Europe 30 years ago. I have more foreign affairs experience than

Governor Lipstick.

[Occam Bandage]

4. ...

Whaddya mean? Of course I can land this plane! I watched like five of them land while waiting for my connection in Atlanta!

[EnviroBat]

One of those buttons makes it go.

Neato!

[SweetieD]

5. I can see Wall Street from my house. I'm qualified to be Secretary of the Treasury.

[demokatgurrl]

6. Did you know she appointed someone

I believe to be Secretary of Agriculture, because the woman "liked cows"? I am not making this up but I don't have a link at the moment. I'll look around for one.

Along those lines, I am fully qualified to be a veterinarian, because I have a cat and live next door to someone who has a dog.

[eshfemme]

16. Oh man, if you hadn't reminded me, I would have forgotten the AL "love cows" Sec of Agriculture

Jesus Christ, for most of the Alaskan state positions, you just need to have gone to Sarah Palin's high school to qualify for anything!

[Chichiri]

7. I used to live within view of Canada.

Does that make me the Ambassador?

[RichGirl]

28. I did too.

I could gaze across the nasty Detroit River and see beautiful downtown Windsor. Magically...I learned how to speak canadian. I continue to speak it fluently. It's a miracle!

[MannyGoldstein]

8. I Saw The Moon Yesterday

I'm qualified to be NASA Administrator.

[Cleita]

9. Well I followed the Tour de France route on google maps

street view. I guess I could be ambassador to France.

[Muttocracy]

10. I'm not sure she has personally seen Russia anyway - just that SOME can. nt

[subterranean]

11. Actually, she never claimed that SHE's seen Russia

She only said that Russia can be seen from part of Alaska. Therefore, just being IN Alaska counts as foreign policy experience!

[catlady]

15. My mother actually went to Russia! And I've been to Alaska personally...

I think that now qualifies me to be President of the WORLD! Yay for me!!!

[CreekDog]

12. I once saw Cuba from a passing Cruise Ship.

:shrug:

[libnnc]

13. I can see the Wachovia building from my house

Can I be Treasury Secretary?

[Mme. Defarge]

14. Need to beat a murder one rap?

No problem -- I watch re-runs of Law & Order almost every day?

[eshfemme]

17. That qualifies you to be Attorney General! Congratulations!

And OMG, I love Law & Order-- my favorite cop combo of all time is Briscoe and Green.

[Mme. Defarge]

29. I miss Fontana ...

:loveya: Lenny, too. And, oh, Detective Logan.

[BlueIdaho]

18. Are you kidding me?

I've been to Canada dozens of times and the UK three times - I'm just trying to figure out which ambassadorship I should accept.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

19. After having visited Canada, the UK, Switzerland, Lichtenstein, Italy and seeing Mexico from San

Diego, I'm qualified to be the Secretary General of the UN. ;)

[oviedodem]

20. I have been to the Bahamas, Grand Turk, Puerto Rico, Jamaica, and St. Thomas all on one trip

I MUST BE MORE QUALIFIED

[apnu]

21. I should be Transportation Secretary. I regularly drive from Chicago to New York City

I'm more qualified than she is. She's seen a road, but I've driven on the road.

:sarcasm:

[medicswife]

22. I live on a military base, so I can be

A 4 Star General and take over as Commander of Cent Com

:rofl:

[Liberal_Stalwart71]

23. I lived and studied in England for a year; I think that qualifies me for Prime Minister

:shrug:

[insanity]

24. I worked in the Scottish Parliament for a few months

That means I have more foreign policy experience. Also, I've actually been to Ireland for more than a refueling stop.

[katandmoon]

25. I worked 3 blocks from the White House for many years, and I used to walk past the White House

Twice a day. So, I think that qualifies me nicely to be president.

[AZBlue]

26. I've driven past the Pentagon, so make me Secretary of Defense!

Also...if her refueling stop in Ireland qualifies as a "visit to Ireland" then my 3-hour layover in England, where I actually got off the plane, unlike Palin should make me a British citizen, no?

[progressivebydesign]

27. I met James Brown at LAX once, but it doesn't make me a back-up singer. n/t

[JeffR]

30. I'm an American living out of the country!!

Damn, I must be a foreign policy genius.

[zulchzulu]

31. I once saw a UFO while coming back from a Dead show... so...

...I must be an astronaut.

[eshfemme]

32. Dude, you're totally qualified to be the fucking Head Scientist of NASA!

Or SETI if you prefer. :)

[racaulk]

33. When I was 19 I went on a cruise, and the ship was in the port at Nassau for a few hours.

This makes me distinctly qualified to be the US Ambassador to The Bahamas.

Where do I sign up? :patriot:

[auburngrad82]

34. I've served on juries and would LOVE to be attorney general

So I could prosecute some of the lying scumbags in the GOP.

[eshfemme]

35. You can be the one to nail that fucking bastard, Karl Rove!

And yeah, that's more than enough experience to clean up the DoJ.