Please be careful with using the terms "Soccer Mom" and "Hockey Mom" to demean

[Fran Kubelik]

I'm a soccer mom, and I am an educated voter. You don't win votes by demeaning the audience you are trying to sway. Not all "soccer moms" or "hockey moms" are idiot Nat'l Enquirer readers.
There is so much corruption in Palin's past, so much vapid ignorance. Point that stuff out. Don't use Hockey Mom as a derisive term. You're going to turn off way more people than you will win with taunts like that.

[Balderdash]

1. Recommended!

I hope your post does some good but the blatant sexism, even here on DU has been a wonder to behold. Good luck though. :)

[loveable liberal]

2. As a mite and squirt coach I know....

it is very dangerous to piss off hockey moms.... they are more wild than the hockey dads!!!

[Rosa Luxemburg]

3. Agreed

[Union Thug]

4. The problem I have is that these labels are constructs that hardly

reflect the reality of life for most people. I think that they are used as another means of constructing convenient identities for people who, once they have bought into the pigeon hole, can then be whipsawed around by the marketers (political or market). The core of modern American life, consumerism, is so empty that we are striving each for an identity, and apparently, people will latch on to whatever if fed to them

We just stood for almost three hours, burning in the sun yesterday watching our two kids' soccer games, but I'll be damned if I'm going to start calling myself a soccer dad. And my wife wouldn't take kindly to having her identity wrapped up in a recreational activity we provide for the kids.

How many damned mom prefixes are there now? I've lost count. There are soccer moms, hockey moms, security moms (the one term I hate the most). It's just manipulative pigeon-holing. Blah.

[seabeyond]

13. i have kids. i stay at home. i take care of all family life. even drive them to sports.

soccer mom? not even... lol

i hear ya

and to be derogatory about this group is off kilter.

[Fran Kubelik]

24. Right. And I don't call myself a soccer mom unless I am making a joke...BUT...

I am the mom of a kid who plays soccer, and when you dismissively refer to a portion of the demographic as Soccer Moms I find myself taking offense. :shrug:

[Union Thug]

35. Gotcha. And I wouldn't berate soccer moms ... Patty Murray ran on that platform years ago..

mom in tennis shoes, that kind of thing.

But I do think we need to be careful about attaching ourselves to pre-provided demographics. There are reasons that these labels are thrown out there, none of which are to help the people.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

5. It is MSM media that started to use Soccer Moms as a demographic after 9/11 in regard to

the election of 2004. I do think it is demeaning as well. For years I was a Soccer Mom and Little League Mom and at the same time my politics have never waivered from my Democratic Progressive roots.

I frankly have not heard anyone here on DU use that as a derogatory term.

[BlooInBloo]

6. (shrug) I want someone better than a "soccer mom" or "soccer dad" as my President/VP...

Nothing wrong with being a soccer mom or dad, I just want more.

I don't care how insulting anyone thinks that is - I still want better. I want better than the average American.

[seabeyond]

14. then again, per previous post on this..... isnt that the truth. lol. n/t

[Fran Kubelik]

32. I want someone better than Sarah Palin as my VP.

And the fact that she lists "hockey mom" as one of her accomplishments is laughable. My point is that we're ridiculing the whole demographic now - and that doesn't do ANYTHING to help us get our point across.

[Joe the Revelator]

7. Why demean yourself by referring to yourself as a "soccer mom"?

I'm fairly certain that there is much more that defines you then your children's after school activities.

[seabeyond]

15. but then isnt that really true of everyone, so does a "soccer" mom really exist

i was saying in post above, they may label me a soccer mom. i do some of the stuff. is my life. but the conclusion of a soccer mom is no way who i am.... so i agree, absolutely with your post

[mtnsnake]

17. Hear, hear!

Amen to that!

[Zuiderelle]

19. It's not she who is defining herself that way. It's like being a WASP or a Yuppy.

Most WASPs and Yuppies wouldn't define themselves that way, but they know that they are defined that way. So if someone says, "All WASPs are racist!" I would say "Hey, wait a minute I'M a WASP, and I'm not racist, and I'm offended by your post." (Even though I absolutely do not identify AS a WASP, I know I am probably identified as such by others, in a general sense.)

Would you react with "Why do you define yourself as a WASP?"

One can be a lot things where "Soccer Mom" is just one part. No matter how small a part that is, someone who fits that particular segment of the population (a mother whose child plays soccer) might be offended if someone insulted the segment as a whole with "Soccer Moms Are Terrible Mothers" for example.

Short story... I think you're missing the point.

[Joe the Revelator]

20. I don't think that is a point

WASP vs Soccer Mom is apples to oranges. You have a choice to define yourself as a soccer mom or to know that you are bigger then the sum of your children. Being white, anglo-saxen or protestant are things that you can't change (aside from maybe the protestant part).


A soccer mom is a "soccer mom" by her own definition, not by societies. I know many moms who's children play soccer that don't define themselves by that.

[Zuiderelle]

22. Look, I'm a mother who has a kid who plays soccer, so I know that I would be put in the demographic

of "soccer mom." Just as I would be put in the demographic of white, gay, female. If someone says "All gays ..." or "all women ..." or "all white people ..." or "all soccer moms" ... it makes me defensive.

That's the point.

[Joe the Revelator]

23. You're putting yourself into that catagory, society hasn't done it

Its your hang up.

[Midlodemocrat]

27. Horseshit. If you don't think that society hasn't pegged that

demographic, you haven't been paying attention.

I'm NOT a soccer mom. My kids play field hockey, lacrosse and wrestle. But I know they are referring to me when they say soccer mom.

[AlCzervik]

30. same here, my kid goes to kick boxing and is a runner but they mean me when they say Soccer mom.

[Zuiderelle]

34. Thank you.

:hi:

[Zuiderelle]

33. No, I am not. You are purposely missing the point. I understand that since I am a mother who has a

child who plays soccer, I simply AM put into that category by very definition, the same way I am put into a WHITE or FEMALE category, no matter how I define MYSELF.

Why are you arguing with me, anyway? Do you seriously not see my point?

[Joe the Revelator]

36. I seriously don't.

People like to put themselves into categories in order to feel victimized. Do you see that point?

[Zuiderelle]

37. I am saying that I recognize that OTHERs categorize, and by definition

I fall into that category. I don't believe that you don't understand what I mean.

[AtomicKitten]

8. It's deriding her for co-opting a term that is only barely applicable to her actual experience.

[Bjorn Against]

9. The problem is that our media tries to turn "soccer moms" and "hockey moms" into political groups

Soccer moms, hockey moms, and Nascar dads are not political groups, and it is very shallow for the media to pretend that they are. When we are getting this completely senseless analysis it makes these groups of people appear really shallow, and gives them a bad name when they don't deserve it. The problem is not soccer moms, the problem is that our media pretends that they know how soccer moms think, and then other people think soccer moms are as dumb as the media portrays them as. The problem is the media not soccer moms.

[Fran Kubelik]

25. EXACTLY

Thank you. I am just asking us as outspoken liberals to avoid doing the same.

[bridgit]

10. agreed...

[beachmom]

11. When you interview for a job, do you say first "I'm a Soccer Mom"?

Of course, not. You would be laughed out of the office. You first state your education and qualifications for the job, and why you are most suitable for the job! Unless the work is directly related to child care or coaching a sport, it has no relevance! It is just an anecdotal part of your bio, definitely not mentioned on your resume.

I find the Sarah Palin candidacy patently absurd, starting with "Hockey Mom". For God's sake, by that definition Kerry is a "Hockey Dad" since Vanessa played hockey. It is completely stupid, and has NOTHING to do with whether or not she is a suitable V.P.

So to me, when people demean or praise "Hockey Mom", they miss the point. "Hockey Mom" is a distraction from who Sarah Palin really is -- I think the NYT and the WP today have started shedding some light on who she is, and it is most certainly NOT a "Hockey Mom".

Oh, and I am a stay at home Mom, although my kids don't play soccer. But I think I have a bit of authority here on this topic.

[BlooInBloo]

26. +1

[Fran Kubelik]

29. I think you and I agree. We're saying basically the same thing.

Maybe I didn't say it clearly and left room for misinterpretation. But I agree 100% with what you're saying.

[polichick]

12. My children play soccer, that does NOT make me a "soccer mom"...

imo those titles are demeaning from the get-go.

[Joanne98]

16. I'd ignore those terms all together. Just keep calling her a LIAR!

[alfrankenaynrand]

18. true

well put

[salonghorn70]

21. Excellent Post

Your post ties in with several others on DU today that talk about the "dumbing down" of the electorate. As Fran points out in her most excellent post, demeaning voters is not the way to win elections.

[treestar]

28. Didn't Failin use that herself, and brag about it?

It is seen in a positive light.

[Fran Kubelik]

31. True, which I think is why we (DU/dems) have started repeating it more and derogatorily.

And while I certainly agree that being a hockey mom or soccer mom should never be a line on anyone's resume, my point is that making fun of soccer moms or hockey moms as a group will not serve us well when we're trying to get our message out.

[RagAss]

38. "Real" Hockey Moms are French-Canadian....

;-)

[GreenPartyVoter]

39. Another Soccer and B-Ball mom here