Vet yourself for VP here!

[Zomby Woof]

I confess: When Costco gives out free samples, I take two.

[WheelWalker]

1. I never exhaled.

[madeline_con]

2. I like plaid.

But only in certain color combinations.

[msallied]

4. Communist.

LOL

[msallied]

3. I am not immune to the occasional fart after eating pinto beans.

[Motown_Johnny]

5. There are no videos of me trying to be a sports announcer

[NJGeek]

6. I once lived in a narcissistic commune

[Ichingcarpenter]

7. We have just had a Republican attack on this board.

not you.

[chknltl]

8. Two things that a good VP should be able to do:

Possum stew taste tester and gozinta cypherer

J.B. Clampett

(disclaimer: "If brains was lard, Jethro couldn't grease a pan."
- Jed Clampett)

[chknltl]

9. I can spell potato!

[silverojo]

10. I can pronounce "nuclear" correctly! n/t

[jberryhill]

16. I can put food on my family /nt

[Erin Elizabeth]

11. The entire second semester of my senior year in high school

is essentially a blur (damn Pink Floyd Dogs of War tour or whatever that late 80s album was called).

One more cat and I'll be the mayor of Crazytown.

I really don't enjoy small children all that much. And I'm a mom. (But I do love mine! And they aren't small anymore.)

I read trashy tabloids.

I believe in the five second rule.

I love a nice strong drink.

BUT--I also have a master's degree. Can I be Veep? LOL.

[EnviroBat]

18. I can fly a single-engine plane while nice and tight,,,

That should be all the qualification required.

[jberryhill]

12. I Posted to DU /nt

[WheelWalker]

13. I can't stomach Canadian whiskey.

[Ikonoklast]

14. I have no idea how that dead hooker got in the trunk of my car

She must have been tired and looking for a place to sleep.

Any other explanation is just speculation on your part.

[jberryhill]

15. With that qualification, you can chair the RNC

You are exceptionally well qualified.

If she was from another country, it also counts as foreign policy experience.

[EnviroBat]

17. I can field-dress a hooker....

[jakem]

19. is that what it is called these days?

[EnviroBat]

22. Sometimes we call it "Dumpster pumping..."

Ugh, I'm not right.

[bushisanidiot]

20. I once wrote a letter to Santa Claus

I bore my soul to him. I never got a reply. I have no evidence that the letter every made it safely to the North Pole.

[EnviroBat]

23. No reply, but he was fine to gobble up my milk and cookies.

bastard.

[bunnies]

21. My state borders Canada therefore: I have foreign policy cred!

:bounce:

[EnviroBat]

25. My states major lake bumps right up into Canada.

My foreign policy experience is astounding! Plus, I've been to Canada more than once to visit the strip clubs! I'm about to pass out.

[blondeatlast]

24. There is an embarrassing video of me singing "Midnight Train to Georgia" that negates my extensive

foreign relations experience (tourism to Germany, Czech Republic, Malaysia, Taiwan, Singapore, Mexico, and Canada), but not my ability to speak almost fluent Spanish.

Yes, the video really truly is that bad, but my costuming was aces!

[begin_within]

26. When Costco has a free sample that's really good, I go around and around, just to get a lot

The poor lady never recognizes me even when she's seen me 7 times in the last 15 minutes. Oh and I've had plenty of sex on public land.

[renie408]

27. I figured you would have a link to Google on there. n/t