My friend who volunteered at the DN convention sent this. I thought it was cute.
July 31, 2004
By COLIN McENROE
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/07/31/opinion/31mcenroe.html?ex=1092285807&ei=1&en=b424419e30bc90ce(free registration required)
(snip)
My name is Licorice, and I am a hamster. I was
the hamster of Alexandra's sister, Vanessa, and she, on
balance, was a good person, although a bit of a tickler. On
this occasion, as the family gathered on the pier to depart
for a vacation, somebody - I'm not saying it was Alexandra;
I'm not saying it was on purpose - "bumped" my cage, and
the next thing I knew, I was in the water and sinking fast.
(snip)
Yes, it was John Kerry. Help was on the way. Yes, he did
perform CPR. Yes, he did perform mouth-to-mouth
resuscitation. There is no doubt that I owe him my life. On
the other hand, the water went up to his chest, O.K.? I
mean, this wasn't exactly PT-109.
(snip)
And I'm glad I wasn't a Bush family pet. Their hamsters
probably have to rescue them, from the looks of things.
I might wind up speaking at the Republican convention,
though. I'm opposed to stem cell research. With any kind of
research, hamsters always wind up taking it right on the
chin. And we barely even have chins.
Colin McEnroe is a radio talk show host and writer.