The C.I.A. Home Page...for KIDS. Not a satire site. God help us all.

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

http://www.cia.gov/cia/ciakids/ginger/scene01.html

Hi! My name is Ginger. That's short for Virginia, where my home is. All day long I sit on Marta's desk. Marta's my friend and she's an analyst at the CIA. This is a very important job because what she writes may be seen by the President and other important people in the government. What she does helps them make important decisions about our country. I'm very proud of her. I'm happy to keep her company while she does her important work. Sometimes, though, I wish I could see the rest of the Agency, all the places Marta talks about.



Hmm, Marta is going to be out of the office on business most of today. Maybe I can take a little tour by myself and get back before she does.



I'll try not to get in any trouble. I just want to see the rest of the Agency. C'mon with me, let's go for a tour!



Wow! This is the main lobby of the CIA!



Oops! I have to get back in, but I don't have a badge.



Lucky the guard knows Marta and me. He said I could get a badge just like Marta. The officer said he would take me to the office to do that.

[spindrifter]

1. Yes--I found this

little gem a while back. FEMA also has a homepage for kids. Seems like the grownups need some lessons, though.

[meti57b]

2. They made that to explain the CIA to duhbya.

[alphafemale]

3. hmmm...are those Taser or Lash wounds on the poor bear's back?

Notice they weren't there at the beginning of the "Adventure."

[SofaKingLiberal]

5. self-delete

[uppityperson]

7. you are very observant.

I think lash marks, don't think tasers leave that sort of mark. Notice it can't walk without help either.

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

8. Yeah, but after the torture Ginger gets lemon fish and 2 kinds of fruit.

:evilgrin:

[alphafemale]

10. Sadly, I'm still wrestling why a "blue" bear is named "Ginger"

Just another incongruity I cough at.

But maybe that's my own color/spice association bias.

[Jara sang]

4. NSA for kids

Holy fucking shit

http://www.nsa.gov/kids/

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

6. "America's Future Codemakers and Codebreakers!"

Gotta train 'em right outta the WOMB, Stretch!

[SofaKingLiberal]

9. I wonder how advanced some of those games get.

Maybe a way of finding prodigys?

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

12. I wonder if these "kids" sites set "tracking cookies"...

...to help them find prodigies and terra-ists.

:evilgrin:

[Sven77]

11. working on the kids early

training them to be slaves. making schools into prisons with cameras everywhere. forced drugging with the new freedom act. im sure they will start some hitler youth tattle squads.

[Trillo]

13. Didn't those get started with the War on Drugs?

For clarity: referring to the tattlers.

[Moochy]

14. Let's visit Marta in Poland at STARE KIEJKUTY

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/security_poland_dc Polish PM orders probe into CIA prison allegations

This reminded me of Tim Robbins in Nothing to Lose, on the subject of mascots gone wrong..

from http://www.script-o-rama.com/movie_scripts/n/nothing-to-lose-script-transcript.html

Ladies and gentlemen, introducing the new mascot for Hidy Ho Cookies--
Zippy!
What-- What is it?
- Zippy. - What is Zippy?
- He´s a cookie man. - He´s a cookie man?
What is that, uh, on the ground behind him?
Oh, that´s a trail of chocolate chips. See, wherever Zippy goes...
he leaves this magical trail of chocolate for all the boys and girls--

Magical? This-- This looks like poop. lt looks like piles of poop.
- lt looks like Zippy´s walking around, ju-- just crapping all over the place. - Stop.
- lt looks like-- - No, no. Those are chocolate chips.
- Emma, what do you think it looks like? - Excrement.
Zach, let´s just say you´re about to take a big bite of a juicy chocolate chip cookie?
What´s the last image you want floating through your head?
- Excrement? - Excrement. Right.
Listen, l wanna go out on a limb here. l´m gonna say maybe we should avoid...
all bowel-related items with this particular product.

And also from the Wonder Showzen on MTV2, Safety Sparrow,

and Clever Carrot

[petgoat]

15. NORAD has a kids' site about tracking Santa Claus

on his rounds in Japan and Africa....


http://www.cannonfire.blogspot.com/

[crispini]

16. LOL! That's hysterical.

I did actually go visit the CIA building as a child on a school trip, but I don't remember the bear. I remember throwing up halfway through the trip and having to be personally escorted out of the building. :D