If Bill O'Reilly could spin any faster and harder...

[Sir Craig]

...he'd be a f*cking tornado.

I just pulled this nonsense from his page at the Faux News site, and if there was ever a man with a greater need for a book of ethics and a dictionary than O'Reilly, I have yet to hear of him:

There Is No Uprising in Iraq

Once again, the elite media have misled you. On the front pages of The New York Times, The L.A. Times and The Washington Post, the words "uprising in Iraq" are featured.

One problem, it's not an uprising. The Berlin Wall deal was an uprising. The regular folks rebelling against an entrenched authority is an uprising. Militant attacks in Iraq are an insurgency, not an uprising. This kind of stuff makes me angry. The elite media often spins information to make editorial points. And that's really wrong.

I took the liberty of breaking out my handy-dandy Webster's Encyclopedic Dictionary to see what Webster had to say about the difference between uprising and insurgency. It turns out that there isn't a whole hell of a lot of difference. Uprising was defined as "an insurrection," and do you know what is synonymous with "insurrection"? That's right: insurgency. I hardly think 1 degree of separation makes all the difference in the world.

The scariest thing about his total lack of ethics and/or knowledge of basic English is the fact that this SOB is the single biggest reason Faux News continues to exist; this tells me that all those viewers who drive up his ratings are, by and large, failing to see O'Reilly's bullsh*t themselves, and that tells me we have far too many ingnorant f*cks running around this country who probably believe anything the right-wingnuts tell them.

O'Reilly then closed his Talking Points Memo with this announcement:

Today in Iraq, there was less fighting and no uprising. "Talking Points" is confident the American military will crush the al-Sadr militia and subdue the town of Fallujah. Again, somebody alert the elite media. There is no uprising in Iraq.

Well then, I guess someone had better tell the families of those American servicemen and Iraqi civilians killed that it was all nonsense, simply something the "elite media" made up to scare hard working, patriotic Americans.

Christ, he makes me want to vomit...

[xray s]

1. Keep that one bookmarked

These idiots will choke on their own words come November.

[ochazuke]

2. How about a "people's revolution"?

Patriotic Iraqis unite across religious lines to oust the invading Christian hordes.

You have entered the counter-spin zone.

[Skittles]

3. I'm sick of the word ELITE being hijacked

by people who salivate over paying $2000 for a crappy dinner.

[SpartacusSC]

4. hmmmmmmm......

Bill, since there is no indigenous civilian authority in Iraq and an occupying foreign army, wouldn't the appropriate term be "popular guerrilla resistance," since we are splitting semantic hairs here? ;)

[JBoris]

5. Be Afraid (but not of what Bush tells you to fear)

That Son of F*cking B*tch and his mindless audience is one reason why I fear the worst for November.

[hasbro]

6. Just a couple more stone tablets handed down from

Mt. O'Reilly.

The rampant egotism inherant in his statement: not a break in patern. The guy really has a messiah complex.