From The Smirking Chimp
It is a good read
http://www.smirkingchimp.com/thread/18982RepublicAnonymous: An 8 Step Guide to Rightwing Redemption
Greetings, Republicans.
How's it going?
World getting out of your control?
Re-thinking all that support you wasted on the Worst President Ever™?
Positively freaking out because all the times you told yourself you weren't a racist the election of a black man has brought it home to you that you really are?
Or worse - are you realizing how bad it is to be "a republican"? Hell, the republicans wrecked America! How do you like your precious little party now?
Hmm?
Relax. I bring you hope.
In the near future we will all hear admonitions to "get along", to "engage in the spirit of bipartisanship", and to "forget past differences" so that "we can move past these difficult times and move the country forward".You will be told the "we on this side of the aisle" are ready to welcome you to work us and to let bygones be bygones.
These flowery words will sound soothing and probably offer some comfort as your mortally-wounded belief system comes crashing to the ground as the economy crashes down, as a new prsident takes over and the national copnversation is on "how to rebuild" after the devastation of 8 years od republican rule.
As you gradually become aware of the disaster your president and your Republican party have made of this country, you, as a reasonably descent person overall, may wonder what you can do to cast off the taint of the Republican Party's Great Failures.
You can be redeemed!
All is not lost.
You have come to the right man.
Those flowery words should not put you at too much ease because that is what "great politicians" do. (Bush was an incompetent politician who was at war with the English language, and losing on his own turf).
While the big politicians prattle on about "getting along" don't forget there are plenty of folks like me (well...sorta like me) who aren't so thrilled about just letting you all "off the hook" for all the terrible things you have done.
Not by a longshot.
But...take a note! This is not the place for recounting your transgressions. I am pointing you towards a path back to righteousness. I am saying you - yes You! - can get right with the world again.
In -12- 8 Easy Steps!
1. We admitted we were powerless over Reality. No matter how hard we tried, we could not change the world by lying.
You actually believed a lot of things that were simply not part of the real would over 5 billion other people live in. Yes, I know the vast majority of those people are poor and not white and therefore technically "don't count" in your particularly analysis of the world, but they are real and it is difficult to explain to them how otherwise wealthy, educated people can come to adamantly believe so many ridiculous things.
2. Came to believe that a Moron greater than ourselves could restore us to power.
Electing Bush was the highest manifestation of this dynamic.
You must confess and admit you were wrong to vote for George W. Bush. You believed in him and you got punked. You voted for the Worst President Ever, probably twice. You cheered him on. That has to feel pretty horrible. But please...remember, there is Hope for You.
3. Made a decision to turn our lives - and our neighbor’s lives - over to the care of The GOP as we understood Them...as they spoke to us through FOX News and talk radio.
This is where you are now. You cast your lot with these liars and they took you and me and everybody else down the river.
They have filled you so full of lies and ideological nonsense - and you have bought it on your good faith - You must renounce them!
Turn OFF Rush Limbaugh... Turn OFF Sean Hannity! Never again foul your ears with The Savage Wiener. Cast these demons OUT of your life NOW!
You'll feel so much better and you will be able to get along with people better.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of others, but realize we are out of touch with ourselves. Oops.
That's it in a nutshell. Out. Of. Touch.
Creationism. A 6000 year-old Earth.
Really - we are supposed to believe this?
This is a fine example of your dogged determination to ignore reality at every possible opportunity JUST to salvage your long investment with these criminal goobers. Don't you know you appear to most others like raving insane people, preaching with bullhorns in the middle of the road?
You were lost, but now you are found.
5. Admit to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
This is your nest step. You have to take responsibility for your past actions whether you can plead insanity or not. We must have accountability, you know. It's important. I have heard you all talk about this many times.
You know.., once you get this off your chest and really apologize to the rest of us, everybody will feel better. You. Me. The rest of the people in the world.
But you have to actually do it. This will be a challenge for the hardcore believers... the dead-enders. Some may never make it back, they may just be too far gone.
6. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
This part should be easy, since you all cheered on every government agency to spy on everybody in the country.
How many lists are there by now? Is there a master list? Find that one and apologize to 73% of the people on it.
I think we all just want to see some irrefutable demonstration that you really do understand your need to apologize to the world. (Now, now... don't get overwhelmed. We're here for you...once you repent.)
7. Make direct amends to such people wherever possible.
So far all I have seen is taking care of the top 1% with an $8 trillion dollar giveaway. How is that not "redistributing the wealth" and sending money to commoners like you and me is?
IF you really want to go beyond apologizing and do some positive works (reparations) after the last Step and discussion. I know you are itching to get redeemed but patience is a virtue. Just one more
8. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, carry this message to other Republicans in need.
Yes...once your self-esteem can return you can begin to take this message of Hope to others who are still in the throes of ignorance and deceit, living base lives of greed and envy and fear-mongering and shouting people down when they mention reality.
Can you imagine how you will feel on the first day you can have this conversation with somebody like you? Glory. That's the feeling. Just imagine the pride of admitting that you USED to be "one of them" and that you haven't been for 90 days...180 days... One day at a time you will get there.
I hope I have helped you see some light at the end of your long, dark tunnel. You have worth. You can be redeemed. You do not have to be a republican your whole life. Following are a few suggestions and tips for "making your journey from the ideological fantasy land of Republican World to the place we call 'reality".
Essential Confessions and Admissions
Aside from the 8 steps above, consider these essential to your list:
*Denounce Bush as a war criminal and can cite a few facts as to why this is so.
*Denounce the Entire Cheney Administration.
*Admit that the occupation of Iraq was an illegal act of aggression predicated on a gigantic mountain of lies and has been a failure and has caused world opinion to sour on us..and increased terrorism.
*Also essential is repudiation of torture or "harsh interrogation" (until "harsh interrogation" can be defined as not in violation of Geneva Conventions.) Extra point: Admit that anybody who quibbles about whether or not torture is really torture is a barbaric asshole who should be tested to ensure they are not a menace to society around them.
Extra Credit Work
Some general Random Acts of Atonement™, in no particular order.
*Consider the outside possibility that Barack Obama may have actually excelled in college and may be better qualified than them, me, or you - at this point in time - that would be a plus.
*Become able to cite 3 reasons rightwing talk radio is bad as one's only source of "news".
*Renounce FOX News. (Note: That one does win enthusiastic applause...)
*Admit that War is not Peace and that Ignorance is NOT strength.
*Become conversational in the idea that other people's privacy is at least as important to them as yours is to you.
*Admit that hippies are a hell of a lot less threatening than terrorists and not vice versa.
*Be able to admit that Republicans are a small party of white rich powerful people who look down on everybody else and are fearful of losing their ability to do so.
*Admit that Sean Hannity is an elitist dweeb.
Oddly, statements about relegalization or ending the war on drugs don't count as the support for this is so widespread as to be almost apolitical, but you will get an extra point for being able to see that the republicans ARE primarily responsible for "it" still being illegal.
My friends contributed some other ideas too.
*Admit that they let their idiot leader lie, then acted like that idiot's lies were true, and that hundreds of thousands of innocent Iraqis died as a result.
*Devote a good portion of their time to working in a homeless shelter or a soup kitchen.After all, they were complicit in the destruction of the American economy,so they should face the human consequences and costs.
*Admit that the meme "No one could see the financial apocalypse coming" is pure bullshit.
*Talk is cheap. Long lists of mea culpas are all very nice, but actions speak louder than words. Having victims of Bushonomics staring at you over the dinner table every night will do far more to drive the point home.
____________________________________
Well, I hope you are feeling inspired.
You can hope for change in your life. You can get on the right path.
It doesn't have to be like it was.
There.
Is.
Hope.
_______
Yes We Cannabis!
There's no money for your issue so long as we're squandering $50 billion a year on the DrugWar. Ben Masel
About author
Doc is a long-time cannabis relegalizer and Director of GreenState Project, voter, homeowner, taxpayer and human services professional. He plays a mean guitar, loves dogs, camping/hiking/backpacking and is very happily married.
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