6-year-old’s growing convictions regarding reincarnation

[rbnyc]

My 6-year-old asked me this morning why he had to be born in the fall of 2004 and why he couldn’t have been born in the winter of 2003. This mostly comes from his frustration at being a little younger than his peers at camp and school. But I thought it was interesting that his question was so specific, especially since, as many of you know, I lost a baby that would have been born in the winter of 2003. I’ve never told my son about that, but this morning at breakfast, I decided to go ahead.

I said, “I was supposed to have a baby in the winter of 2003, but you know how mommy got into a bad car accident before you were born? Well, I was pregnant when that happened and the baby that was growing inside me died in the accident. I wanted to get pregnant again as soon as possible. So I got pregnant that winter, and that’s why you were born in the fall of 2004.”

My son said, “Oh mama, I feel so sad for you. You must have been sad when I died and went up to heaven. But then I found the portal and came back to your tummy and got born.“

I said, “Do you think that’s what happened? I don’t think there’s any way to know that.”

He said, “I know because I was there.”

“Do you remember that?” I asked.

“No, I don’t remember any of it because it was too long ago, but I know that’s what happened.”

“That’s an interesting theory,” I said and we finished our breakfast.

[GreenPartyVoter]

1. I like that theory. I've always liked to imagine that the two babies I lost in

miscarriages found their way back to me as the guys I have now.

You have an awesome little guy yourself, to come up with that on his own! :D :hug:

[rbnyc]

3. It started a while ago...

...when he was considering what happened to his Grandpa Ernie when he died.

Thank you. I'm so lucky.

[GreenPartyVoter]

5. Oh, that's so hard for them to lose a grandparent. :^( My older boy was 6 and

refused to believe that Amma (my mom) had died, insisting that it was Nana (my grandmother) because the oldest should go first. The littler one just said, "Amma gone. She's a goner. She's kicked the bucket!" (He must have gotten that from a cartoon??)

Since we did nightly prayers we always asked God to say hi to Amma and would blow her kisses. My younger guy was just 4 and would tell me that Amma would visit him in the night sometimes. I like to think that she did. :)

[Tuesday Afternoon]

2. portal. good word.

sweet story. :)

[rbnyc]

4. Thanks...

...he used the word portal the last time he was explaining to me what happens after you die. You go to "the dead place" where you get Santa powers so you can see everyone at the same time, and if you want, you can find the portal and come back to Earth as a new baby.

He hasn't used the word in any other context, but he did ask me the other day to tell him what a worm hole is.

[nolabear]

6. Keep that conversation going and you've got a best seller in the works.

Isn't the kid's book whose father says he told them all about heaven when he went there at four still at the top of the list? Of course, you have to throw all that "theory" stuff out the window and put your back into it.

[rbnyc]

11. "theory"

I like your post. Thanks. I just always want to be careful, though, about letting him make up his own mind about this kind of thing. Kids believe what you tell them. And often, the first thing they hear is hard to overcome. I don't want to endorse a particular point of view in this area, except for one, I suppose, and that is the point of view that accepts many possibilities but refuses to settle on one.

A book is a good idea.

:hi:

[Orrex]

7. .

[elleng]

8. Oh geeze. BIG hugs for him.

:grouphug:

[MorningGlow]

9. WAY cool

Wise child you've got there. :hi:

[rbnyc]

12. Somewhat...

...I just got a call at work from the camp director because he was chasing the boys around in the locker room after swim time pretending his penis was a fire hose! He stopped short of actually peeing on anyone. He just held it in his hand, made the fire-engine siren noise and chased everyone around.

OMG

I'm to reinforce the message that this is not appropriate camp behavior.

[mikeytherat]

13. I'm to reinforce the message that this is not appropriate camp behavior.

He's just getting an early start - when he's in college, this type of behavior will be the norm!

mikey_the_rat

[rbnyc]

15. LOL!

He's just advanced.

:evilgrin:

[MorningGlow]

16. Ha!

My little genius (7 1/2) has taken to sitting on my knee and then farting. Inappropriate now, but apparently he has a great future as a frat boy. :eyes:

[Orrex]

17. Tell the director that he was a firefighter in a past life.

[rbnyc]

20. LMAO nt

[kentauros]

10. "Error: You can't recommend threads from this forum"

Even though I want to! :D :hi:

I wonder if he's having any OBEs and such? :)

[rbnyc]

14. Thanks.

He’s very interested in science. What I am seeing is a tendency to blend scientific knowledge and spiritual knowledge, for lack of better terms. For example, he’s been curious about worm holes and has learned (during supervised internet research) that these are time-space portals in the universe. In his developing mythology about where people are both before they are born and after they die, he envisions portals between our living world and “heaven” or “the dead world” – terms he uses interchangeably.

Also, he and I talk a lot about the phases of water and he likes to play a game where we are water molecules and as it gets hotter we step further away from each other because it’s too hot to be close and we become steam, and as it gets colder we step toward each other until we are hugging to stay warm and we become ice. This is one of his favorite games, especially when we take walks together. Then, he hears his classmates talk about the soul and how the soul is eternal. He equates that with the phases of water – water never disappears; it changes but it is always there-same with the soul. Death is like evaporation and reincarnation is like condensation.

I’ve been told many times that he is too young for abstract thought. Maybe it’s not that abstract. Maybe it’s all just very literal and logical to him.

His conviction in reincarnation is definitely growing. Nothing else makes sense to him. The soul can’t be destroyed so it has to go somewhere, and since we all have one (according to him) we had to get it from somewhere. So life and death as a big soul recycling mechanism is his solution.

Sometimes, I seriously think he is a genius. But he is indeed a pretty normal kid and the bulk of his conversations involve fart jokes.

[abq e streeter]

18. You have a truly amazing kid

I did not know of the accident and losing a baby. I'm so sorry , even though it's been a lot of time since that happened. Ya know, your little guy might just be on to something though. He really seems to be just unbelievably wise for his years............... "I know because I was there." Wow.

[rbnyc]

21. I love our relationship.

We spend almost an hour a day walking and talking. We have lots of word games and story games that we play, or we just talk about ideas. I couldn't imagine life without him.

:loveya:

[kimi]

19. You have a compassionate and perceptive boy

Your family must be very strong and special. What a lovely thing for him to say to you, bless his heart.