If a person is in a relationship with a lying dog do they deserve to know?

[dkf]

[Bake]

1. Let a lying dog sleep ...

So to speak. That person will figure it out soon enough.

Bake

[Iggo]

2. Yes.

[LaurenG]

3. If I were your friend and you knew that I was hanging with a lying dog

and didn't try to tell me, I'd be pissed. I want to know these things but that doesn't mean it's the right thing to do for everyone.

Use caution and know your friend well enough to know what they would want in this case. If you aren't certain, don't tell because you will end up the bad guy until the person sees it for her/himself.

[seabeyond]

4. to me, it is an easy one. you dont tell me, and you go along with the lying dog. BUT

my hubby said he would not want to know. surprises the hell out of me. so i did a poll on du. about 30% would not want to know.

the messenger may get the brunt of the anger, and that has a lot of people wary. those 30% that would not want to know (and again, i dont get it), i would not want to be the one telling. but as a friend, i would be bothered if i was not told.

leaves a person in a quandry.

[Sweet Freedom]

5. Absolutely, yes

especially if the lies can hurt this person. Not truly knowing someone can forever change a person's life. They are being denied the ability to make reality-based decisions about their own well being and are instead making decisions based on deceit.

And this may be extreme, but in not revealing a known deception, aren't you 1) lying by omission and 2) silently condoning the action of the liar?

So yes, I think they deserve to know. They may not want to to know, but they deserve the truth. :hi:

[dkf]

6. What if they just got married? Too late?

[Posteritatis]

9. Friend of mine just today walked out of a marriage to a lying dog, so I'd say not. (nt)

[Sweet Freedom]

13. No, it's not too late.

Sometimes, you just don't know who you married. Unfortunately, I think this has happened to many people. But I think it's better for this person to find out now, and have the opportunity to live a better life, than to find out later that they have been living a lie.

[RedCloud]

7. No. If they cannot figure out they are in a relationship, well there you go!

[McCamy Taylor]

8. No. Unless....

....you are the spouse of the lying dog and you are fed up with his/her philandering.

....you are the spouse of the person seeing the lying dog and you are trying to salvage your relationship.


Note that kids, neighbors, best friends and parents are not included in either of the two above.

[gratuitous]

10. Have your girlfriend PM me

I'll tell her.

[RSillsbee]

11. Stay out of it

or both of them will turn on you

[ceile]

12. Yes, but sometimes they won't care.

Told a friend about her man's extracurricular activities- she didn't care, married him anyway.

[dixiegrrrrl]

14. Yes they deserve to know but I won't be the one to tell them.

Innocent partner either suspects but is not ready to face reality
or
eventually will suspect and face reality
or
will never figure it out and ignorance is bliss.

Also, is the lying dog ( male or female) guilty just this one time
or
is that serial pattern
and
what karma is coming at them down the road that MY interference might mess up?

But I would not cover for the lying dog either, and god help them if they back me into a corner about covering.

[Ineeda]

15. Could you throw it in her lap?

"I know some stuff...do you want me to tell you?" (Sorry to be sexist, but I assume the 'lying dog' is male.)

[kimi]

16. I can't speak for anyone else

but I think I would deserve to know. I would WANT to know, really. "Deserve"?? Yes.

If someone had told me sooner about the jerk I recently split with, I might have saved myself some serious heartache. But that's a whole other story. In that case, hell, yes, I deserved to know.

Best of luck, whatever you decide.

[applegrove]

17. I told two "old friends" of mine I was harrassed inside and outside of

the workplace by a psychopath. They lied to me and neglected to mention the guy and his friends had been in my life, through them, for years ..... asking questions about me, changing their thinking about me, him wanting to see every letter I had ever written to them as a teenager. I even went to the police and still BUPKISS. Two people, who continued to pretended to be my friends, did not warn me he was still in my life in other ways. Obviously these people are no longer in my life.

Warn people.

[elleng]

18. Yes.

I married one, sociopath; worst mistake of my life. Still paying for it, and he's still lying.