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CURTAIN RODS --- and the New Divorcee
On the first day, she sadly packed her belongings into boxes, crates
and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
dining-room table, by candle-light; she put on some soft background
music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a
bottle of spring-water.
When she'd finished, she went into each and every room and deposited
a few half-eaten shrimps dipped in caviar into the hollow center of
the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
On the fourth day, the husband came back with his new girlfriend, and
at first all was bliss.
Then, slowly, the house began to smell.
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping, and airing-out the place.
Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned.
Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought into
set off gas canisters, during which time the two had to move out for
a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive
wool carpeting. Nothing worked!
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.
Finally, they couldn't take the stench any longer, and decided they
had to move, but a month later - even though they'd cut their price
in half - they couldn't find a buyer for such a stinky house.
Word got out, and eventually even the local realtors refused to
return their calls.
Finally, unable to wait any lon ger for a purchaser, they had to
borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
Then the ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He
told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and
said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to
reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for the house.
Knowing she could have no idea how bad the smell really was, he
agreed on a price that was only 1/10 th of what the house had been
worth .... but only if she would sign the papers that very day.
She agreed, and within two hours his lawyers delivered the
completed paperwork.
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home
... and to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!
* I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU ? **
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