MiddleFingerMom OUTRAGED to find "surf & turf" NOT among post-surgery menu choices

[Amerigo Vespucci]

CNN BREAKING - MiddleFingerMom was "angered, hurt, and a little confused" while fulling out his pre-surgery paperwork at his local hospital on Saturday. "I looked for the surf & turf," he said. "I wanted to get it with those little red potatoes tossed in parsley and butter, and maybe some strawberry cheesecake for dessert. But I couldn't find the check-off boxes on the menu."

Enlisting the aid of a passing nurse, MiddleFingerMom discovered that his choices were "jello" and "tapioca." When he protested "But I want surf and turf with those little red potatoes tossed in parsley and butter some strawberry cheesecake," the nurse...later identified as Ms. Ratchet...replied "Then you'll really like the jello. It's strawberry."

MiddleFingerMom could be reached for comment, but CNN reporters decided against it.

MORE: No Surf & Turf for MFM

[Tobin S.]

1. lol!

That's good. :D

[HopeHoops]

2. You'll have the luke-warm meatloaf and cold mashed potatoes with lumpy gravy and LIKE IT!

Now shut up and enjoy your Demerol, damn it.

[MiddleFingerMom]

3. This has been one of my major concerns.

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I almost certainly won't be very hungry for a day or three, but UMC here in Tucson
(where Gabby received HER care) has an EXCEPTIONAL patient kitchen -- you order
a la carte from an actual glossy color menu -- and I would order SOME of the offerings
in a restaurant. No surf-and-turf... but they DO offer broiled salmon with a mango salsa.
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http://www.umcarizona.org/body.cfm?id=1260
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I DO crave snacks and treats in the hospital and that craving is an unbelievable flavor
enhancer -- Jello DOES become ambrosia.
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They give you a whole buttery of tests (alkaline, I think) to see what's best for
your individual digestive tract.
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No, I'm NOT looking forward to that (despite what Kali might say).
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[HipChick]

4. Umm... BF was stuck with a feeding tube for weeks after his surgery

because he couldn't keep anything down...it kinda limited his choices..

[MiddleFingerMom]

5. He shoulda asked his doctor to decrease his Viagra dosage.

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:evilgrin:
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[applegrove]

6. I was in hospital a few years back. The food was actually kinda fine.

[freshwest]

7. Brilliant! I'll bet they'll give some pureed asparagus through an IV, though.

[MiddleFingerMom]

9. That has a tendency to make my blood stink. n/t

[freshwest]

11. The salmon with mango would help that. With garlic and onions.

[Kali]

8. "MiddleFingerMom could be reached for comment, but CNN reporters decided against it."

:rofl:

[freshwest]

10. CNN can't handle the truth!!!