All my rowdy friends have settled down. :(

[Skip Intro]

I am the guy that stayed single. Didn't have kids because I questioned my ability to be a good father. A rough childhood will do that to ya, when you remember clearly telling your dad and mom you'd never treat your kids like they were treating you. I don't like peas.

Soon enough, friends came and we had fun. And one by one, they married, had kids, and disappeared.

I never wanted to follow a well-worn path. I wanted to be an individual. And I thought for a time...

*heavy sigh*

I miss my old buddies. I miss making something fun out of next to nothing on a Saturday night.

And now, I find myself vacant, inside and out. They're all gone, and I'm alone.

I know country songs are made of this stuff, so I really don't feel so all alone. Other people feel as I do. Wondering if any of them are on DU.

Waaah, waaaaah, waaaaah.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. My dear Skip Intro...

I'm sorry you're feeling so down...

I suspect you'd be happier if you had someone to love.

Take care, OK?

:hug:

[Skip Intro]

2. I have a cat. Oh God. nt

[CaliforniaPeggy]

3. Cats make good companions!

I suspect you might be happier with a human, though...

I say human since I don't know about your orientation!

:P

[Skip Intro]

7. Neither do I, CP.

I do appreciate your responses to me though, always, "My Dear..."

That's awesome.

I don't know though.

I find myself older, well, literally and literally, but I feel like 16, or at least 25. I still in my heart feel like the world is mine to conquer.

And I won't give up or take less. I just won't.

But the older I get, with all the vitality that I have, and man, I'm rocking out to Ministry right now, I have to wonder what has passed me by. It's a sad state. I could have joined the military at 17 and I'd be retired by now instead of grasping at each paycheck to make ends meet, which they haven't for a while now. But the true freedom, comes from knowing that I only have myself to answer to. I have no one to disappoint but myself.

At least I tell myself that that is freedom. But there is some part of me, Ms. Peggy, that feels so empty, and that I feel so anxious about. I feel that maybe I'm the one who made a mistake by not just grabbing up some girl and making babies. And I feel that that opportunity is now in my past, I missed the boat on that.

Not on true love. But you know, I don't really pine for true love. Just some friends. Some true friends. I have none, outside of relatives, and I think they just put up with me as the situation calls for.

Are you still reading? I'm so sorry. I sound like a whiny kid who'd rather throw a tantrum than accept reality. But my problem is, I'm not quite sure what my reality is. I'm not quite sure where I go from here.

Bla, bla, bla...

[CaliforniaPeggy]

8. I AM still reading, sweetie...

I am here for you, at least electronically...

You don't sound whiny at all. I don't know how old you are, nor does it matter. I know guys in their 50's who are just now finding the love of their life...I don't think it's ever too late, really...

:hug:

[Skip Intro]

9. Oh, you are a DU angel.

Thanks so much for your kind words. More appreciated than you know.

[w8liftinglady]

4. well..I feel your pain-I divorced and moved(unknowingly) to red conservative hell

it's mighty lonely...I write a lot.

[seabeyond]

6. i thought you were getting to Wa.?

am i thinking of another poster. and if i am, .... you moved to tx not knowing it was conservative. bah hahahha. lol

hugs to you. i am stuck too

[Kali]

5. volunteer somewhere

most communities have a central information point for volunteer work - pick something that interests you
could be physical like trail building or touchy-feely like visiting nursing homes, or just practical like helping with bookkeeping at a non-profit

doing something outside you "self" might make you feel a little better

[snailly]

10. Quit looking back and comparing yourself to what everyone else is doing now

What do you love to do? You mentioned your kitty. Do you like being around cats in general? If so, volunteer at a local shelter. Go out of your way to include yourself in something you enjoy and just be true and nice.

People are much more accepting than you think. You can start a whole new life if you let yourself. You just have to make a new definition of fun for yourself. No one stays a teen or 20 year old even though it's so much easier. You have to grow and you'll find much more beauty in this world than you've never noticed.


I'm shutting up now. Good luck!

[Skip Intro]

11. Well...

I do feel for my new cat, though she is very aloof and not one to lay in my lap. And she makes me sneeze. A lot. But I rescued her, I took her out of real danger and promised a home to her. And she's not very affectionate. She sometimes hisses at me when I pet her. She's a handfull, and she has a pattern. She's not the answer to any lonely need I may have, but I rescued her, and I see to her happiness. I'm getting a second cat just to keep her company. I'll probably have to go outside to breathe at that point. And then, I'll be the single guy with two cats...

Kill me now.

[City of Mills]

17. Hey KNOCK IT OFF

I'm a single guy with two cats :headbang: so at least you aren't the only one. Last potential gf I had broke it off because she thought a guy with two cats was 'weird'...yeah, I'm sorry I didn't throw them in the river when my marriage failed and we split up the pets...sheesh.

Damn now I'm bummed out.

I recommend going to meetup.com or similar, find a group of people who like to do the things you do, and you'll meet some interesting people and maybe make some different friends :)

[Skip Intro]

12. Second reply.

You are absolutely right. Good advice. I'll need to re-read this thread tomorrow. Man, tomorrow is going to be GREAT if I ever get there. I can't think any further at this point...listening to Duran Duran.


Oh God, kill me now.

[Skip Intro]

13. Classic DU dupe. Erase this post, mods. Btw, I love you all, mods.

:)

[Skip Intro]

14. Well, a necessary link that was omitted fron the OP. With lyrics. Tells my story...check it out...

These guys do it right:

All my rowdy friends have settled down and it seems to be more in the laid back songs.
Nobody wants to get drunk and get loud.Everybody just wants to go back home.
I myself have seen my wilder days and I have seen my name at the top of the page,
but I need to find a friend just to run around.But no one wants to get high on the town
and all my rowdy friends have settled down.

And I think I know what my father meant when he sang about a lost highway and old George Jones I'm glad to see he's finally getting straight,
and Waylon staying home and loving Jesse more these days,
and nobody wants to get drunk and get loud and all my rowdy friends have settled down.

and the hang overs hurt more then they used to and corn bread and ice tea took the place of pills and ninety-proof,
and it seems like none of us do things quite like we used to do
and nobody wants to get high on the town and all my rowdy friends have settled down.

Yeah I think I know what my father meant when he sang about his lost highway and Johnny Cash don't act like he did back in '68
and Kriss he is a movie star and he's moved off to L.A.
and nobody wants to get drunk and get loud and all my rowdy friends have settled down

yeah me and my rowdy friends have rowdied on down.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm63_M_4BF0

[HEyHEY]

15. Move to China

Been here a yer, all my friends back home are growing up, but I'm stuck in neverland. No one here grows up, it's hilarious. I know 40-year-olds that stay out till eight in the morning (No closing hours in bars here) and they are just funny.

[Heidi]

16. CMW and I have single male friends.

The good thing is that we get to spend more time with them than we do with our married friends (most of whom have kids).

[femmocrat]

18. Sorry you are lonely, Skip Intro....

My son is going through the same thing. All of his old buddies are married or have moved away. He was engaged for awhile, but it didn't work out.

Keep getting out to meet people! That is well-worn advice, but it's the best advice.... Don't shut yourself off from new opportunities.

:hug:

[hippywife]

19. First, I'm terribly sorry

that you are feeling this way. I can't imagine how that must feel. :hug:

Second, I totally agree with all of the advice everyone here has already given. If you feel like you can still conquer the world, then I suggest you do it, but maybe not in the way you might think. There has always been a great need for people, and now in this horrible economy, the need is so much greater.

Try to find your niche in an area that means something to your heart. Go out there and work on conquering hunger in your community, or illiteracy, mentor a fatherless child, or some other issue you feel strongly about. There are huge injustices without nearly enough people to work away at them. None of these take money and many don't pay any, either. But if you really feel like conquering something, do it...but do it for the benefit of others and your aloneness with disappear in the rewards of seeing someone else or many someone else get their needs met and going out to also seek to conquer because of your example. You won't be doing it alone, and will meet some really great people in the process.

Channel your strength into something you have a passion for and...go forth and conquer! :hi:

[old mark]

20. Old Skip: I was married and soon divorced, remained single for many years after...

Found love, real happiness and a great marriage in my mid 40's. There were other women before , just not the right one.
We both had rough childhoods, both are VERY MUCH individuals and neither is a "shy" personality...

It was well worth the wait...married 18 years last March.

Oh, yeah, and FWIW, a lot of MY old buddies - and old enemies -
are dead.

I'm still here, having a better time every year.


Life can still show you some twists and turns, even at your advanced age, Old Skip.


mark

[liberaltrucker]

21. One of two Hank Jr songs that I actually like

Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound being the other.

And....I feel your pain.

x(

[velvet]

22. yeah

Similar, familiar here. Happyish childhood, but for various reasons never felt the urge to marry & have a family. Now in middle age and living far away from my old friends I don't regret that choice but life is certainly a little hollow without a partner. There have been some and fine relationships they were too, but it's been years since I met anyone I could love.

But what the hell, there's plenty else to enjoy in life. Turn up the music.

[pink-o]

23. I remember what that felt like: you think you've lost control, that life is changing all around you

...and there isn't a thing you can do about it.

But time is not stagnant, we transit through so many changes. Have faith that you'll come out the other side with a whole new perspective and sensibility that will balance out any loss you feel today.

When I was in my 30s--which I assume you are--there was nobody older to tell me I wasn't alone. Life is hard, time tramples over everything meaningful, but there will be new joy to come, I promise!

[lunatica]

24. Do you want the old days back or have you changed?

Maybe you've changed. Maybe your parents shouldn't have such a negative effect on your ability to have your own family. And you don't have to have children in order to have a deep relationship with someone. The best relationships are based on a foundation of respect and truth.

[Chubb Rock]

25. Get a dog...

I recommend a mini aussie.