Check this out! The Freepers are going on a Cruise!

[JohnLocke]

:scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared:
:scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared:
:scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared:
:scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared::scared:

The dumbest ship ever! Wonder where they're going? Oblivion Isle?

Now, the question. Which ship would you rather be on?

[DarkPhenyx]

1. Quick! Where can I buy a submarine?

Torpedos are easy to come by.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

2. Hey! You said you already owned one!

[DarkPhenyx]

31. Owned what? A submarine?

Don't make me break into sexual innuendo. Please! I so do not want to combine Freeper and Sex into the same thread. :scared:

[MikeG]

3. It figures. We all know what floats.

[Doctor Pedantic]

4. My Suggestion:

Pray for icebergs.

(Yes, I'm going to Hell -- but my heart will go on).

[DarkPhenyx]

32. Vasaline Intensive Care...

...helps to get the wicker marks out of your ass. That hand-basket to Hell is so uncomfortable.

[Zynx]

5. The Titanic. I would just make sure I didn't land in that nasty cold water

[PartyPooper]

6. What could be worse than a boatload of freepers?

I feel sorry for the captive crew! They're going to be over-worked and underappreciated by these low-lifes 24 hours a day!

:puke:

[MrSlayer]

7. Damn! My U-boat is in the shop.

Would be the perfect opportunity. Hopefully dysentery breaks out on board.

[JohnLocke]

8. Heh.

[PROGRESSIVE1]

9. Would they be going on the "S.S Hitler" by any chance???

[renegade000]

10. anyone have a predator drone?

[7th_Sephiroth]

12. no but lets hope

its a loooong cruise and they aint got no oranges (scurvy all around)

[citizen snips]

11. That is one un-sanitary ship.

[SmileyBoy]

13. What about the Edmund Fitzgerald???

Or the S.S. Minnow???;););)

[buff2]

14. Maybe it will be the next target

:evilgrin:

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

15. I would have thought they would have gone to Busch Gardens on vacation...

[JohnLocke]

17. ROFL

[TheMightyFavog]

16. Mr. Templeton!

All ahead flank, go to attack depth, Sound General Quarters have all hands man battle stations.


*sound all requisite klaxons and sounds of crew reporting to positions.

Mr. Wexley, load and flood tubes 1-4 with Mk. 48 wakehomers!

Close to 2 kilometers.

(minues Later)

Wexley: Two Kilometers, captain!

Tube one: fire! *woosh sound of Torp firing
Singh: Torpedo Away, Sir!
Stand by on tube two, Mr. Templeton, running time on first fish:
Templeton: Sixty Seconds, sir.

(one minute later)

*BOOM!! followed by cheers from crew

Periscope Depth!

Up scope!

We've broken her back! She's going down!

*More cheers and loyal huzzahs form crew.

[DS1]

23. Too imprecise, what about the crew?

I say we make the walk the plank.

[TheMightyFavog]

25. Well...

Yeah we could make the survivors walk the bow planes when surfaced, that'd be close enougfh to the plank as you could get on a Churchill class sub! We could also fire them out of the torpedo tubes, as well.

[VOX]

18. Think they'll have one of those viral outbreaks that plague cruise ships?

http://www.broomeman.com/mt/archives/001540.html
"A Carnival cruise ship returned from a three-day voyage Monday carrying nearly 200 people sickened by a gastrointestinal virus, with symptoms similar to those plaguing other cruise liners. A total of 190 passengers and four crew members on the Fascination reported vomiting and diarrhea, but experts had not yet confirmed whether they had a Norwalk-like virus. So-called Norwalk-like viruses have plagued more than 1,000 people on other cruise ships in the past few months, including Holland America Line's Amsterdam and Disney Cruise Line's Magic, causing those companies to cancel one sailing each to thoroughly disinfect the ships."

:evilgrin:

[NightTrain]

19. Hey, freepers: I know of this neat little ship called the S.S. Minnow.

You should really check it out!

[EstimatedProphet]

20. Wow! This is like the Grateful Dead song!

"Ship of Fools"!
So, if someone says something that freepres don't like, do they get thrown overboard? After all, they can't ban them.
I wonder if they'll damage the ship the first time somebody tries to burn a cross on it...

[carols]

21. Well since they all know that the earth is flat

they probably won't be going very far...

[Catherine Vincent]

22. There's nothing wrong with it. I love cruising.

I think DU should book a cruise. They are a lot of fun.

[Turbineguy]

24. Ughhhhhh.......I did some work for

Holland America Line on that ship during its building. I was at the yard in Italy and forced to eat a few decent meals.

It's a really nice ship. Terrific propulsion system.

It was Clinton's fault.

[TheMightyFavog]

26. Does that ship have side thrusters?

If it's that recent it might have them.

[Turbineguy]

28. It's got thrusters in in the bow

and azipods in the stern. Azipods are rudders with a big electric motor (I think 13MW) in the bottom. The engines are Sulzer ZA 40's, some are 16 cylinders and some are 12 cylinders. The engines are on big rubber pads and there is no vibration. There is also a GE LM 2500 Gas turbine.

All the engines drive generators that feed to a single bus and the entire ship draws off that.

I friend of mine was on a similar ship and could not sleep because it was too quiet and he kept thinking they'd lost all power!

By the way, the ship is very environmentally friendly and HAL has a special Engineer who does nothing but monitor that area and makes sure they stay within compliance.

[northzax]

40. you're joking, right?

about the environmentaly friendly part?
This is the same Holland America that was fined 18 million dollars, the largest environmental fine on record, for subverting the compliance procedure? Sure, there WAS a compliance officer, he just lied through his teeth on environmental procedures. In case you don't want to read the whole thing, they were not prosecuted for dumping, but for falsifying records and machinery to make it look like they didn't dump bilge water, sewage and photo-processing chemicals into the ocean.

http://www.miami.com/mld/miamiherald/2002/09/26/business/4153399.htm

The best environmental systems in the world are useless if the company subverts them (Royal Carribean once built a bypass to avoid the on-board wastewater treatment system)

[Turbineguy]

41. I'm just telling you what I know.

The time frame of my knowledge is after the incident to which you refer.

Also, the person to whom you refer was not on the vessel but in the office. (I hope he wins his suit).

Royal Carribean is a different company.

It's quite true that this industry has been slow to come around to the rules. This has been because management did not want to incur costs and crew members were willing to cheat. But it has also been that the equipment was faulty, spare parts were slow in coming, seaworthyness issues etc.

Many older ships are poorly retrofitted.

It's also true that people can subvert the process and equipment. Management has to make sure that they want to obey the law. They also have to tell crew members this and let them swing if they do not.

The laws were far ahead of equipment that actually worked (and not "approved" after functioning in a lab with fake contaminated water). Crews had to work with this equipment.

This particular vessel class has equipment that can actually work in the real world and so bypassing should not be an issue.

I think big fines are a good thing to keep these clowns in line.

[PartyPooper]

27. They should have booked the Queen Mary in Long Beach. It's haunted!

:evilgrin:

[parkia00]

29. I wish, I wish

I wish a brave bunch of protesters with a speed boat can come alongside the liner's hull Greenpeace style and unfold a giant rainbow banner saying"

"First Annual Free Republic Gay Cruise - Come Out Singles & Find Your Partners - G.W. Bush Approved!"

Wonder if any will junp ship? It's a long way down to the water!

[Florida_Geek]

30. Hey, I love HAL

It is too bad they picked that cruiseline.

[JohnLocke]

33. Kick (nt).

[DinahMoeHum]

34. Ship of Meatballs !!! A "foo-foo" ship if ever I saw one.

n/t

:evilgrin:

[Champ]

35. Yes they are taking another one

After the cruise they post the pictures they taken on the boat and it's hilarious! I can't wait.

[WoodrowFan]

38. freepers in thongs!!!

THONG WEDGIES!

[WillParkinson]

36. CHANT: ICEBERG! ICEBERG!

Well, OK, I don't want anyone to DIE.

But maybe a near death experience will open their eyes to what total jerks they are?

[WoodrowFan]

37. The Hate Boat

(sings) Thhheeee HHaaattteee Boooaaatttt


It'll only sail in circles because the rudder will always be set to hard right.

[icymist]

39. Hey! Isn't that the cruise ship that Tom Delay is renting

during the Repuk's convention in New York so they'll have a place to hide when the NYPD figures out who's responsible for taking away their overtime pay?

[jmowreader]

42. This ship is too nice to sink. I gotta better plan...

It appears to me that right above M in the ship's name is a gangplank. And I just happen to sell a chemical that will remove even the worst freeper slime from this nice ship. Here's what we do:

1) Give me three weeks lead time and I'll order a whole truckload of this cleaning agent. Normally I can get it from the DC in a day, but I know what their response will be: "You want a whole truckload of WHAT?" We sell about a truckload of this shit every five years; it's really expensive. Most of the people who buy it are cleaning up after house fires.

2) Then we raid the ceiling fan aisle and scarf up all of the fans with curved blades on them. As seen in "The Crimson Permanent Assurance," you can make five field-expedient scimitars out of one ceiling fan. This we do.

3) We then get Hawker Hurricane to bring his boat and cannon. A few dozen DUers aboard HH's ship should be sufficient. Freepers look flabby and formless to me.

4) The SS Freep will be boarded once it enters international waters and brought to all ahead full. At this time, freepers will be marched off the gangplank, where they will be sucked into the screws and never seen again.

5) HH then drives the ship to a secluded area. We immediately go to work cleaning the freeper slime off the bulkheads and decks.

6) We then return the ship to the crew in the condition it was in before the freepers fucked it up.