Taking "bat shit crazy" to a new level

[DFW]

There's a guy who I have met who is having some legal trouble in the Tampa area. He was always looking to impress people,
to make up for what, I can only guess. But his business is under siege for having diverted a large amount of his bank
credit line into his house. I saw a photo of his "house." It's a good thing I don't live there. I'd starve to death before
I ever found my way to the kitchen:



Even if I DID have that kind of money, which I don't (and, apparently, neither did he), I can't imagine wanting to spend
it on building such a place.

[ipfilter]

1. That's not a house

that's a palace.

[BuelahWitch]

3. Almost looks like a prison

:hide:

[kentauros]

9. My first thoughts, too.

There's no landscaping up against the palace anywhere. Instead, there's a terrace-like deck.

Why are there so few rich people that know how to live modestly? (Like Warren Buffet.)

[PVnRT]

2. If I ever get a palace that big

It will be heavily fortified with at least two 10-foot concrete walls surrounding the grounds with a minefield in between them, a few acres set aside for crops and livestock, a small-scale power-generating facility, and a small warehouse to store a fuckload of ammunition.

In short, it would be where I go to survive the zombie apocalypse.

[rrneck]

4. Or just pissed off middle class suburbanites... nt

[ChickMagic]

8. Don't forget the moat

that you can fill with kerosene and set it on fire.

[proteus_lives]

29. Make sure you have an escape plan.

Fortresses are great but things can go bad quick. Remember what Max Brooks said, "No place is safe. Only safer."

[jdp349]

30. Good thinking

it'll be because of your noble efforts that humanity will recover in the aftermath.

as a fellow member of Zpecial Forces I solute you!

[Drunken Irishman]

5. I don't get why people need a house that big.

I mean, large homes can be nice and I certainly don't have anything against them. However, that's the size of a freaking department store.

What do you do with all that space?

[ipfilter]

6. live in one room at a time. nt

[ChickMagic]

7. The guest quarters or servants' quarters

or whatever it is, is bigger than my parents' house. One flagstone
is probably bigger than our apartment.

[ipfilter]

10. The pool house looks about the size of my house.

[DFW]

11. He probably conducted private whale watches in it

[ipfilter]

12. More than likely he never dipped a toe in the pool.

[ChickMagic]

16. Heh - I didn't even notice the pool house

That's about the size of my folks' house too.

[dixiegrrrrl]

13. So, legal trouble, eh? Wait till he tries to sell this castle.

I would love to know the price for it when he bought it.

[DFW]

18. I know what price he paid for it (i.e. to build it).

$25,000,000

He can't get anywhere near that for it now. He has been trying, from what I understand, and he still owes the bank a fortune on it.
But he owes LOTS of people lots of money, and if the bank could sell it for what he owes on the mortgage, I'm sure they would. But
what would be the monthly upkeep on a place like that? Probably more than I earn in a year. His firm has declared bankruptcy, but
in Florida, you can't take someone's residence in a bankruptcy proceeding (maybe why he settled there). But I can't think of who
in their right mind would WANT to live in a place like that. You'd need a separate GPS signal for every member of the family just
to locate them to get them to the dinner table, and I'm sure the house has its own area code, if it's not already in two of them.

[Orrex]

14. Xanadu!

[GirlAfire]

15. I Remember When...

...I wanted a 44-room house (with 11 rooms on each of the four floors). And I wanted each room to have a different theme.

Sigh... brings back memories of my silly, childish days...

[petronius]

17. That would suck - I'd think of something I wanted to tell my wife, and then

an hour later when I finally found her I'd have forgotten what it was. I guess the whole family has to wear pagers or carry cell phones at all times...

[DFW]

19. And GPS navigation systems to find them all.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

28. The size of the house doesn't matter

I forget stuff like that, and I got about 1300 sq ft.

:rofl:

[Call Me Wesley]

20. Rrring-rrring (internal phone-based communication system):

- Yes, sweetie?
- Are you coming to bed?
- Which room?
- 23/4 B.
- I'll hit the bathrooom at 15/8 C first.
- 19/2 D would be closer.
- I like 15/8 C more. It's the Venetian tiles. 19/2 D is Spanish sandstone. I don't like sandstone.
- Don't care, are you coming to bed?
- Ermm ...
- What?
- My GPS says if I walk there, I'll be there tomorrow morning.
- You know what, put a rocket up your ...
- Which rooms was it again? I'm in 3/4 A. There's a zombie here, too.
- Forget it.
- What? I live here for three years and I haven't made it to the pool yet, which is 36/7 F. I haven't gone further than 21/8 E.
- I want a divorce.
- In 65/9 A? Hello? Hello? I need to go to 15/8 C ...

[DFW]

21. This could be a never-ending story...

I'll fill in the next few lines:

- Yes, sweetie?
- Are you coming to bed?
- Which room?
- 23/4 B.
- I'll hit the bathrooom at 15/8 C first.
- 19/2 D would be closer.
- I like 15/8 C more. It's the Venetian tiles. 19/2 D is Spanish sandstone. I don't like sandstone.
- Don't care, are you coming to bed?
- Ermm ...
- What?
- My GPS says if I walk there, I'll be there tomorrow morning.
- You know what, put a rocket up your ...
- Which rooms was it again? I'm in 3/4 A. There's a zombie here, too.
- Forget it.
- What? I live here for three years and I haven't made it to the pool yet, which is 36/7 F. I haven't gone further than 21/8 E.
- I want a divorce.
- In 65/9 A? Hello? Hello? I need to go to 15/8 C ...
- Well, I can't pick you up. Larry is driving in from 39/6 E. Call a cab.
- I tried that. They said it would take 10 minutes to get to the house, which means you wouldn't be at 15/8 C in less than an hour....

[BlueIris]

22. Holy crap. That's the scariest looking monstrosity I've seen in a while.

You could get at least one (maybe two) good secondary schools in there.

[KG]

23. and, like much of contemporary america, built with money he didn't actually have.

[Blue_Tires]

24. yeesh...what happened to style and taste in architecture??

[sarge43]

25. Jeebus

You'd need a small army just to keep that monstrosity clean.

[MilesColtrane]

26. I know a guy like that.

He owns two Bentley's and is the saddest excuse for a human being I ever met.

[TrogL]

27. Looks like my Second Life house

He should have gone for a flat roof. You could probably put a small runway up there.

[Z_I_Peevey]

31. I'm consumed with curiosity about how and where

rainwater drains off that weird, waffley roof. Or series of roofs. Or whatever the hell that mess is.