Any DUers an embalmer? I'm turning a third cousin into a fountain...

[rug]

The trouble is he wasn't very well endowed and I do not want to do a disservice to his memory.

Any ideas?

[carpetbagger]

1. Embalmers use putty.

I'm sure it does just as good a job on a shy winky as it does on the emaciated cancer look.

Edit: I'm not being purposefully crass towards people who have had loved ones die from cancer. The inside story is that my father, in a desire to be the man of the house and get everything taken care of, planned for his anticipated death in great detail. He joked around quite a bit with the people at the funeral home about the makeup.

[noamnety]

2. you might consider a beer fountain

The alcohol might work as an embalming fluid, plus it makes you pee a lot - good for fountains.

*disclaimer for legal purposes: I am not fully licensed embalmer, there's a small chance it might not make dead people pee.