absolute worst name ever?

[mcctatas]

[NightWatcher]

1. a close second......

[mcctatas]

2. maybe dick had a run in with rusty?

which caused the trickle? (sadly, Dick Trickle is one of the most famous Wisconsinites next to Ed Gein, Jeffrey Dahmer and Lawrencia Bambeneck :P

:hide:

[HopeHoops]

3. Dick Swett

He was a WONDERFUL representative while I was in New Hampshire, but seriously, shouldn't he have gone by "Richard"?

[elehhhhna]

4. D'Alcapone Alpaccino Morris

D'Alcapone Morris Wanted By Police
Jill Del Greco, Reporter
Posted: 6:52 pm EDT July 8, 2009
Updated: 9:20 am EDT July 9, 2009

DAYTON, Ohio -- A Dayton man named after a notorious mobster is wanted on a charge of murder in the city of Dayton.

Montgomery County prosecutors have charged D'Alcapone Alpaccino Morris, 21, with murder, felonious assault, aggravated burglary, aggravated robbery and kidnapping.



http://www.whiotv.com/news/19996695/detail.html

[Corey_Baker08]

39. WOW this is my local News Station....

Are you from the Dayton area or just happened to come across the site?

:hi:

[elehhhhna]

48. heard the name on the nooz few months ago & LOLd

[midnight armadillo]

5. How about...

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2009/01/13/2009-01-13_report_child_named_adolf_hitler_removed_.html
3 year old named "Adolf Hitler."

[gmoney]

6. I don't know how people live with some names...

People with bad last names should be allowed to just change them... let's give them an amnesty.

Kuntz, Roach, Gross, Butt, Weiner, Dick, Trickle, Boehner, Hogg, etc.

Names that include those or other problem terms, like Cum***, Horo***, Slut***, ***shitz, Fuk***** etc.

Even "Brown" and "Johnson" and the like can be problematic if people don't pay attention...

I'm sure there are plenty that I'm overlooking (feel free to add to the list). I don't judge these people, but it seems that life is enough of an uphill struggle without having a bad moniker working against you, too. Perhaps in another culture or another time, some of these names have a noble tradition and great heritage, but here and now, they just provoke giggles and put the person at risk of not being taken seriously.

[mwooldri]

29. Roach? That's not that bad of a name really.

When I think of Roach I think of William Roache (yes he's got an 'e' on the end) and he's had one job since 1960 - playing Ken Barlow on Coronation Street... He's probably the most famous "roach" I know...

And a friend from university: he just went by his last name because it did not go well with Richard (because it would get abbreviated to Dick in connection with his last name... Manley). I can understand why.

Mark.

[gmoney]

35. Sorry, I'm guessing most people think of the scurrying little insects...

Again, I know culturally some of these names may have great nobility elsewhere, but I just don't think they translate.

What I also don't understand is when people with unfortunate names USE them in the name of their business, like if Mr Roache opened a motel, surely no sane person would call it The Roache Motel, but I'm guessing somewhere in the world, there is one. Or Roach, or even Roche...

There's a local construction company called "Butt Construction" -- I'm sure they come from a long line of Butts (not even Butz) but why name a company that? Acme, Ace, A-1, Well-Built... millions of names far better than BUTT CONSTRUCTION.

[mwooldri]

37. Well Built? You gave me a dirty mind...

Well Hung Crane Company.

Enough said.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

72. There's an occasional DUer with that name

:shrug:

[undeterred]

75. Dung is a vietnamese name

It was the first name of a woman I worked with... she Americanized it.

[JitterbugPerfume]

7. Fanny Butts

[Xithras]

10. I met a Fanny Schitt when I was a kid

Never forget that one. She was probably close to 100 at the time, but I'll never forget her deadpan expression the first time someone giggled. "I may have a funny name, but I'd rather be Fanny Schitt than a little dumb shit."

She was actually a very nice lady, but I could never get over the name.

[anneboleyn]

40. "Adolf Hitler Campbell"

Yes, his parents are a pair of white supremacist morons:

http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news/local&id=6559357

Priceless -- Wal-Mart decorated the kid's birthday cake (with the name) whereas ShopRite refused. "The Campbells ultimately got their cake inscribed at a Wal-Mart in Pennsylvania, Deborah Campbell said. About 12 people attended the birthday party on Sunday, including several children who were of mixed race, according to Heath Campbell." Adolf's siblings are named "JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell" and "Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell."

UPDATE -- In January the children were removed from the home by social services in New Jersey and in an update posted in March a judge still had to decide what would happen to the children.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2009/01/13/2009-01-13_report_child_named_adolf_hitler_removed_.html#ixzz0NChA4bXh

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/03/12/2009-03-12_judge_yet_to_decide_fate_of_3yearold_ado.html

[Deja Q]

8. Not the best of names, but what a lovely pair of bedroom eyes...

:D

Of course, he's hiding his thumbs... they're said to reveal a lot about a guy... :evilgrin:

[Mariana]

9. There's a urologist in Austin named Dick Chopp,

He specializes in vasectomies.

[mcctatas]

11. I had my first pelvic exam done by...

Dr. Finger, no lie!

[Mariana]

13. My folks had a veterinarian called Dr. Slaughter.

You'd think some of these people would change their names. Dr. Finger is just too much, I'd be cracking up and falling off the table.

On the other hand, NO ONE ever forgets Dr. Chopp's name when they're deciding who's going to do their vasectomy. Half a dozen guys I worked with had their snips done by him.

[Minimus]

45. OMG - the OB/GYB that delivered me was named Dr. Finger.

Charleston, SC - 45 years ago.

I could not believe it when my Mom first told me.

[hippywife]

12. I'm thinkin' that it's

probably pronounced Koontz. :shrug:

[Mariana]

14. A likely story.

Seriously, even if it is pronounced Koontz for real, he still has to correct everyone who pronounces it the way it looks. What a drag.

[Orrex]

24. Sure. Just like Boehner is pronounced "bay-ner."

[Shell Beau]

15. Areola.

I do research in old courthouse records for my job (for oil & gas purposes). Came accross good ole Areola. There was also a Deliverance. These were old names. Before areola was an areola I hope, and definitely before the movie Deliverance.

[carpetbagger]

16. I knew someone named Failure

Real name was Thalia, which in Appalachian twang was close enough for the Social Security Agency to hand her a card with her new name Failure, which she used until her death at a ripe old age.

Edit: interestingly enough, all three people named failure in the Social Security Death Index lived to be at least 89.

[Shell Beau]

18. Ha! I can kinda see where Thalia became Failure.

Sort of.

Funny how those old names just don't translate to today's time.

[Auggie]

17. I knew a Holly Hooker

[Mojambo]

19. I still like Dick Trickle the best. n/t

[crim son]

20. Heh.

Is that so? :P

[Mojambo]

22. Oh boy... How did I not see that one coming?

:rofl:

[crim son]

31. You DO realize you just did it again, right?

:rofl: :hug:

[Mojambo]

33. Yup.

:toast:

[lutefisk]

28. Is that a verb or a noun?

That is the question.

[madamesilverspurs]

21. Well, after eight years of getting screwed by both

a Dick and a Bush, how much worse could any other name be?

[Orrex]

23. I worked with a young woman whose last name was Hoar

And later I worked with one whose last name was Braswell.

Sure, it was pronounced brass-well, but everyone who saw it in print read it bra-swell. I'm sure that junior high school was very kind to her.

[EvilAL]

69. I have a friend who's last name is Hoar,

the funniest part of it all is his mother's maiden name is Mann.
So his mother is a Mann and his father is a Hoar.
It just screams for a Jay Leno "weddings headlines" The Mann-Hoar wedding.

[eppur_se_muova]

71. "Operator? I only have one dime for the phone and I need a tow truck."

"Where are you, sir?"

"I'm at the Hoar house on ..."

"Well, it serves you right!" *CLICK*




This actually happened to a vicarious acquaintance of mine.

[fizzgig]

25. this one is pretty bad

[Orrex]

47. The surprising thing is that it means that somebody saw Goldmember

[Manifestor_of_Light]

26. I met Mr. Goodbar.

Really, I did.

He was a bankrupt in Bankruptcy Court.

I googled and found a James David Goodbar born in 1948 in Galveston, so it's no doubt the same guy I saw in court years ago.

I also know a Dr. Cutshaw (known as "killer Cutshaw" in some circles)

My mom went to an oral surgeon named Dr. Duncan Blades.

:rofl:

[mwooldri]

30. An unfortunate name for a company:

Shipman Family Home Care. http://shipmanhomecare.com/

Yep a real company.

Regrettably I think of Dr. Harold Shipman: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dr_Harold_Shipman - he had accredited 218 murders under his belt.

If the company were in the UK it'd have to change its name PDQ or go out of business. To me, it's definitely a very unfortunate choice of business name.

[rurallib]

27. Once again I must enter the name of Fonda Dicks

all state HS girls basketball player from Moravia, Iowa somewhere @ 1972.

[Jetboy]

32. Beat me to it.

Yup the great Fonda Dix. (I thought it was spelled Dix?)

[rurallib]

46. From the IGHSA record book:

Fonda Dicks, Moravia, 1969-73 3598 (points)

[TroubleMan]

34. When I was a kid in Nashville, there was a guy in the phone book named Choke Puke.

We used to prank call him as kids, and I guess a bunch of other kids did, too. The lady always answered the phone and would say, "Why do you kids always calling my husband?"

No idea why somebody would keep that name.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

36. You'd think with a name like Ima Hogg, she would have been anxious to marry...

She was a beautiful girl, and I'm sure she did not lack suitors. But she never married. She was a truly great lady. I'm still inspired by her philanthropy.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ima_Hogg

[Manifestor_of_Light]

38. I saw her at Jones Hall when I was a kid.

We had season tickets to the Houston Symphony in 67-68 and 68-69.

She was in the Green Room talking to whoever was conducting or was guest soloing, usually Andre Previn.

I thought she was ancient....she was.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

55. She's one of those people from history I'd like to have a beer with

She must have been amazing. :)

[Bertha Venation]

51. I think we should bring back the corset.

:cantbreathe:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

56. Make sure you bring back smelling salts when you do!

:rofl:

[anneboleyn]

41. "Adolf Hitler Campbell"

Yes, his parents are a pair of white supremacist morons:

http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news/local&id...

Priceless -- Wal-Mart decorated the kid's birthday cake (with the name) whereas ShopRite refused. "The Campbells ultimately got their cake inscribed at a Wal-Mart in Pennsylvania, Deborah Campbell said. About 12 people attended the birthday party on Sunday, including several children who were of mixed race, according to Heath Campbell." Adolf's siblings are named "JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell" and "Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell."

UPDATE -- In January the children were removed from the home by social services in New Jersey and in an update posted in March a judge still had to decide what would happen to the children.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2009/01/13/2009-01-13_r...

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/03/12/200...

[anneboleyn]

42. Argh -- my links won't work -- but a quick web search (if you want to look for this sad story)

will turn it up. The whole thing is so unbelievable. There should be a license or something to disqualify people like this from having three children, all given Nazi names.

[coyotespaw]

43. Wow, this deep into the comments

and nobody's mentioned Dick Armey...

[momto3]

44. My dentist when I was a kid.

Dr. Fiehrer (pronounced "fear"). I still hate going to the dentist.

[BlueIris]

49. Aswipe Johansen.

:-)

[arbusto_baboso]

59. Here's a link...

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/92/92ababynames.phtml

[BlueIris]

67. I knew someone would catch the reference. Also? Damn, I'm old. nt

[Blue_Tires]

50. if by 'worst' you mean "AWESOMEST"

[skypilot]

52. Jack Koff

Go ahead, Google it. There are actually some poor guys out there with that name.

[cloudbase]

53. I nominate

[KamaAina]

63. Pete LaCock's dad was Peter Marshall of Hollywood Squares fame

whose true and actual name was "Pierre LaCock". He changed it when he went into show biz. Go figure. :shrug:

[Wapsie B]

54. I knew a woman who's last name was Pickup.

[Urban Prairie]

57. Retired OB/GYN:

http://www.healthgrades.com/directory_search/physician/profiles/dr-md-reports/Dr-Harry-Beaver-MD-FD3B8B34.cfm

Football player:

http://deadspin.com/188653/ladies-and-gentlemen-meet-lucious-pusey

[deoxyribonuclease]

58. Phuc Dat Bich

[Bertha Venation]

60. Shithead - prounounced Sh'Thay

From a bit by Lewis Black

[underpants]

61. There is a business named Harris & Ford in Indianapolis (Indie)

Rusty Kuntz :rofl:

[madinmaryland]

62. Mike Hunt and Mike Ochs

[slutticus]

64. ...

http://www.facebook.com/people/Amanda-Gagnon-Johnson/585513957

[JCMach1]

65. Randy Prude was a Midland county commissioner...

Repug of course!

[santamargarita]

66. George Bush

:puke:

[old mark]

68. Went to a dentist when I was a kid - he was Dr. Groaner......

Only went there once.

mark

[Manifestor_of_Light]

70. In Houston, we had...

Herman Munster, a real person, in the phonebook.

His wife got real tired of answering the horn, I am sure....

:rofl:

[Lydia Leftcoast]

73. Gurley Crumb

was the accused in a murder case in Oregon a few years back.

[MrMickeysMom]

74. Juan Moretime

[mentalsolstice]

76. Harry Cox. nt