Would you be comfortable with your significant other hanging out with his/her ex as a friend?

[Mutley]

:shrug:

[EndersDame]

1. If I were to break up with my better half I would hope to be friends with him still

Not that I am planning to but I think he is a great guy. The question is do you trust your SO?

[Mutley]

2. I'm getting there, I think.

It's a pretty new relationship, and trust comes to me slowly.

[datasuspect]

3. social or business?

[Mutley]

4. Social.

[datasuspect]

5. with or without you present?

see, i'm kinda old school about a lot of things.

one of those things is "potential for conflicts of interest."

if it is a serious relationship, or has the potential to be serious, i would question why the interaction with an ex has to be private, if the interactions are merely social and don't involve an ex spouse or children.

OTOH, i am also a strong believer in "what i don't know won't hurt me."

still, it sounds fishy, especially if the dialogue is framed in terms of what is wrong with you because you have questions about the scenario.

[Mutley]

7. Without me present.

I didn't tell him it bothers me because I don't want to be the type who tells him who he can and can't be friends with. He *was* really up front with telling me they were going to hang out, and he gets bonus points for that, but they're hanging out as we type, and I can't help but feel anxious about it.

[datasuspect]

8. listen to your intuition

i don't trust people as far as i can throw them, though.

i've noticed that many, many people will take every opportunity to screw you over on even the smallest things. often they don't even realize it.

i'd have to question what the payoff is for both of them spending "just friends" time together even though their relationship failed.

naturally, there are exceptions, but they are few and far between.

then again, i attract psychopathic women like porch lights attract bugs.

[Mutley]

9. I have a hard time trusting people, too.

I never know if my intuition is right, or if I'm just expecting the worst to happen.

[Dystopian]

6. I voted yes.

I used to go off with my ex for anti-war events, and sometimes out to dinner while in a relationship. My ex was a wonderful man, and my SO knew he could trust me. My SO lived in Maine at the time, and understood that my mission in life was to stand out whenever and wherever I could, and he often couldn't be there with me. There is no greater bond than truth with trust.

peace~

[Javaman]

10. all depends on the circumstances...

it would be one thing for her have a nice friendly relationship, it would be another if she came home with her shirt on backwards.

:rofl:

[BlueJazz]

11. No, No, No and hell No. I wouldn't do that kind-of-crap to any Woman and I expect the same.

On Edit: If fact, She could invite him over and He could help her pack. :)

[flvegan]

12. Yes. I trust her.

[Orsino]

13. Yes. Has happened often.

She has never left me in any doubt of her commitment, so I have no right to or reason for jealousy.

[Rabrrrrrr]

14. Of course. Anyone who isn't probably shouldn't be in a relationship.

My SO hangs out with a few of her former beaus (though one of them is now a woman...).

Who cares?

They're friends, and they were friends well before I showed up - they should be allowed to remain friends.

And she has many other male friends she hangs out with, just as I have female friends I hang out with.

Anything else is just childishness, a lack of trust, or a lack of self-worth.

[SacredCow]

15. My significant other lives with his ex....

(though he doesn't really call him an ex- just that they now love each other like "brothers.")

Am I comfortable with it? Not really, but not for the reasons you'd think. Honestly- it's probably something that has to be taken on a case by case basis.

[Withywindle]

16. Sure, why not?

In fact, if someone isn't on good friendly terms with at least some of his/her exes, THAT is a red flag for me. Bridge-burners are kind of creepy; implies to me that once the romance/sex stops, the person they once "loved" becomes disposable to them.

[mcctatas]

17. of course...

provided she had gotten horribly unattractive in the ensuing years after their break up

[Kat45]

18. My ex is pretty much my best friend.

I think of him like a brother. We hang out together quite frequently. As a matter of fact, he's also my tenant now. My current SO thinks it's terrific that my ex/friend can be there for me when he can't. Though if we end up breaking up and I have to start dating again, I can see the possibility of my friendship with the ex causing problems with potential new SO.

[graywarrior]

19. Sure

[Mojambo]

20. Nope. n/t