Pain...A poem of mine...

[CaliforniaPeggy]

The pain starts deep inside
Down deep, where there should be joy

Where there should be light
But all is dark and tangled loss

Tears instead of smiles
Noise instead of quiet
Chaos instead of calm
Disorder instead of
Tranquility

My heart lies flayed on the ground
Bleeding out my life
The precious drops run free

Soon the pain will be gone,
Overtaken
By tranquil Death.

And I‘ll escape.

[malta blue]

1. very powerful Peggy.

You are a terrific writer.

Thank you for sharing :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

6. My dear malta blue!

Thank you, sweetie...

I'm not feeling this way, just so you know...

:hug:

[malta blue]

12. Peggy - what are you doing up at this time of day?

I was up last night because the dogs MADE me let them out to bark at the silly people walking in front of the house.

I KNOW you don't have that problem....

:hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

13. Good morning!

I'm up because I woke up a bit ago, and was curious to see if anyone had responded to my poem!

I saw you'd come by, and a couple of my other friends...

So I decided to respond!

I am going back to bed here pretty quickly...

Thanks for being here, sweetie!

Have a great day!


:hug:

[mzteris]

15. unfortunately,

you've just very accurately and succinctly summed up how I'm feeling.

I'd say your poem was beautiful if only it didn't hurt so much. . .

[CaliforniaPeggy]

23. I am so sorry to hear this, my dear mzteris...

I wish I could help you feel better...

:hug:

[puerco-bellies]

2. Hi Miss C-P.

I am uncomfortable with the poem because I associate you with your work and I don't like the subject and tone.
It's not that the poem is not good, it's just not what I want to hear from you.
:hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

7. My dear puerco-bellies...

Ah, I hear you, sweetie...

And I truly understand...

I have had times in my life when I felt this way, but not now. I was really just experimenting with some of the phrases, to see how I could use them...

It is dark, but I meant it to be.

I am truly well, and happy...Not to worry, OK?

I appreciate your comments very much...Thank you!

:hug:

[Capn Sunshine]

33. Yeah, I'm with him

nice compelling dark tone, and sweet death is always a nice touch

But, we lean on you for a ray of sunshine in otherwise dark and malevolent skies.

[Tom Kitten]

3. dear Peggy

How dark a poem that is! But it is beautiful and it makes me want to stay alive even more! I'm just not into the cold dark beak of death visiting me just yet!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

9. My dear Tom Kitten!

It is dark, intentionally so...

I am not ready to leave my life just yet either...This was an experiment with some of the phrases to see just how strongly I could write this...

I am truly well, and happy...Just so you know!

Thank you for your comments...I am glad you think it's beautiful...

:hug:

[harmonicon]

4. damn, Peggy!

I hope you don't really feel that way.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. My dear harmonicon...

Nope...not at the moment, anyhow...

I was in that dark place when I wrote it, but it's unusual for me to be that down...

I had some of the phrases in my head and I wanted to see how I could use them most effectively...

This poem was the result of my trying...

I am happy, and well...

Not to worry!

Thank you for coming by...

:hug:

[FlyingSquirrel]

8. The two most powerful words ever written......

Bah! Humbug!

:7

(has nothing to do with your poem!) :D

[CaliforniaPeggy]

10. My dear FlyingSquirrel!

So...tell me! If those words have nothing to do with my poem, why did you say them here? :D

Forgive my snark!

:hi:

[FlyingSquirrel]

11. Sorry, I am drunk. But I love poems

My mom used to write them. I have written a few but they are not printable, probably

[NanceGreggs]

14. Once again, CalPeg ...

I am amazed at your ability to capture the tone, the thought processes and the nuances of a single emotion, trapped in a moment in time.

We have all been to the dark place you have so aptly described.

For some, it is but a fleeting foray into the darkness that lurks behind our pain.

For others, it is a place all too familiar, one we are sometimes inexplicably drawn to - a place we feel free to not only invite its fatal embrace, but surrender to it completely.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

18. My dear Nance...

Thank you...

You have pointed out the truth here, and much more eloquently than I could have...

:hug:

[NanceGreggs]

24. The truth I pointed to ...

... flowed from your eloquence, not my own.

:hug:

[Haole Girl]

16. Interesting poem, Peggy

I've been thinking about it for awhile... whether pain is noisy or not.

It's certainly not tranquil. And, I certainly hope there are better ways to ease pain than death, too. :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

19. My dear KC2...

I'm sure there are better and more constructive ways to escape pain!

I do know that when I'm happy (which is normally the case) I feel tranquil and at peace with myself...

Pain, be it psychological or physical, is jangling...Unpleasant in the extreme...

Thanks for commenting! :hug:

[skygazer]

17. An excellent description of psychological pain

Particularly the contrasts of tears and smiles, noise and quiet, chaos and calm. I've felt the things this poem describes - no more, thank goodness - and you have caught it beautifully.

Very dark, but very evocative. :applause:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

21. My dear skygazer!

I appreciate very much your incisive comments...

I intended it to be dark; I wanted to see just how dark I could make it.

I must have succeeded...

Thank you!

:hug:

[ikojo]

20. WOW!!!!

That is amazing.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

22. My dear ikojo...

Thank you...

I appreciate your amazement!

:hug:

[UndertheOcean]

25. Beautiful dear CPeggy , like you

[CaliforniaPeggy]

26. Thank you, my dear UndertheOcean...

[SalmonChantedEvening]

27. Excellent Peggy

Simply excellent. Yours is a wondrous gift.

:applause: :hug:

Bob

[CaliforniaPeggy]

28. My dear SalmonChantedEvening...

I really appreciate your kind comments...

Thank you so much!

:hug:

[elshiva]

29. K&R That's how I feel now.

:cry: :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

30. My dear elshiva...

Oh, sweetie...I am so sorry to hear this...

Please reach out to someone for help, OK?

I want you to feel better...

:hug: :pals:

[elshiva]

31. My dear CaliforniaPeggy,

Thank you for your concern. It's just that I am in a lot of physical pain right now, severe abdominal pain.

It was wonderful to read your poem. You are so wise. Don't worry, my parents are helping me.

:hug: :pals:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

32. I am sorry for your pain...

And I'm really glad your parents are doing what they can to help you...:hug:

[elshiva]

34. My parents are awesome. And so are you.

:hug: You are a great poet. :)

[IndianaJones]

35. good one. nt

[CaliforniaPeggy]

36. Thank you, my dear IndianaJones! (nt)

[libodem]

37. That sure doesn't sound like you

who took California Peggy and left this somber poetess?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

38. My dear libodem!

I assure you, sweetie....it is truly me...

I thought these words, and I wrote them...

However for the most part, they do not reflect where I am, psychologically.

It was an experiment to see just how darkly I could write...

And I guess the answer is: Pretty damn darkly! Plus I seem to have upset quite a few of my friends here...

That I didn't mean to do...

I'm sorry...:hug:

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

39. Sounds like you've been to a dark place.

It's a place I know quite well. Fortunately for me it's been a long time since I've been there (or is it a place that has visited ME?).

[CaliforniaPeggy]

40. My dear Prisoner_Number_Six...

I was in a very dark place, but I also wanted to try to see just how dark I could make this...

And trust me, I am no longer in that place!

This was really an experiment...

I think I succeeded...

I hope your dark place is gone for good, sweetie...

:hug: