List some memorable movie insults. (Direct or indirect)

[Hardrada]

I can recall the give and take between Scarlett and Rhett at the beginning of GWTW. Something like, "You are no gentleman." & "It's plain you are no lady!"

And the scene in Shane where the Jack Palance character says to the farmer who had been a CSA soldier, "You're just trash, just like Lee...and Jackson.. and all the rest of that white trash."


& then what Bela Lugosi said about Boris Karloff in "Ed Wood." It was "That limey cocksucker isn't worthy to smell my shit!!"

Anyone have some other examples?

[dawgmom]

1. Your mother was a hamster....

...and your father smelt of elderberries.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
The entire scene, actually:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9V7zbWNznbs

[Hardrada]

7. Great! Always love Monty Python.

[TZ]

61. .

I fart in your general direction!;)

[elshiva]

2. Bruce Willis as the title character in "Hudson Hawk,"

insulting a mobster, "Slurp my butt."

[pokerfan]

3. Casablanca

Peter Lorre: You despise me, don't you?
Bogart: If I gave you any thought I probably would.

[Hardrada]

19. Classic put down!

[Auggie]

80. My favorite

[grannylib]

4. From "The Lion if Winter" -

Richard calling John "that walking pustule"
"What shall we hang? The holly, or each other?" Can't remember if that was Henry to Elinor or the other way 'round.
Elinor to Alais: "Henry's bed is Henry's province; he can people it with sheep for all I care (which, on occasion, he has done)."

[Hardrada]

9. A great cast in that one too!

[grannylib]

34. None better...Hepburn, Hopkins, Harris, Dalton...two in their first

movie roles...
One of my alltime faves!
:hi:

Where in Iowa are you from? I grew up in Decorah :-)

[TheCentepedeShoes]

79. My favorite movie

in the put down dept.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

5. Notting Hill ---

No, leave it. I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, I'm sure it was just friendly banter, I'm sure you guys have dicks the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner, the tuna's really good.

[Hardrada]

6. LOL!

I saw that movie but forgot that scene!

[KitchenWitch]

8. "I crap bigger than you!"

:D

[Hardrada]

10. Funny SNL scene. Phil Hartman in that one I think.

[KitchenWitch]

11. Nope. It was in the movie City Slickers. The line was spoken by Jack Palance.

[Hardrada]

14. He was good at that stuff!

[KitchenWitch]

16. I miss Jack Palance!

:cry:

[Hardrada]

17. Yeah, I know. Me too. I'm starting to miss more actors than

there are actors now. (Sigh).

[Rambis]

45. You wanna piece of me? I've got chunks of guys like you in my stool"

Phil does Frank god rest em-

[MissMillie]

46. It was "I've got chunks of guys like you in my stool"

VERY funny! He was doing Sinatra.

[On the Road]

64. Or in That Silly Adam Sandler Golf Movie:

Annoying Golfer to Sandler: "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast!"
Sandler (loudly): "YOU EAT PIECES OF SHIT FOR BREAKFAST?"

[cemaphonic]

12. Kinda wordy, but I've always loved this one from Miller's Crossing.

You're so goddamn smart. Except you ain't. I get you, smart guy, I know what you are. Straight as a corkscrew. Mr. Inside-Outsky. Like a goddamn bolshevik, picking up your orders from Yegg Central. You think you're so goddamn smart.

You joined up with Caspar. You bumped Bernie Bernheim. Down is up. Black is white. Well I think you're half-smart. I think you were straight with your frail and queer with Johnny Caspar. And I think you'd sooner join the Ladies' League then gun a guy down.

[Hardrada]

13. Excellent! It picks up steam as it goes.

[Forkboy]

68. One of many reason why MC is my favorite gangster movie.

Goodfellas, Mean Streets, etc are all excellent, don't get me wrong, but Miller's Crossing just has that something special to me. The dialog is fantastic throughout.

What is this, the high hat?

[Lydia Leftcoast]

15. From an obscure British movie called "Letter to Brezhnev"

Two working class young women from Liverpool dislike each other intensely, and one of them is gloating about her new boyfriend.

"Oh yeah," the other one snarls. "I've had him, and I'd rather sit on me finger!"

[Hardrada]

18. O snap! Got her!

[nadine_mn]

20. Go home. Put on a silly hat and do whatever it is morons do.

Great line with Gene Hackman and Morgan Freeman in Under Suspicion

[Hardrada]

21. Another good put-down. I am going to have to remember

some of these!

[Oeditpus Rex]

22. Pretty much any Marx Brothers film

Capt. Spaulding: You're Emanuel Ravelli?
Ravelli: I am Emanuel Ravelli.
Capt. Spaulding: Well, no wonder you look like him. But I still insist there is a resemblance.
Ravelli: Heh, heh, he thinks I look alike.
Capt. Spaulding: Well, if you do, it's a tough break for both of you.

Mrs. Rittenhouse: Captain, this leaves me speechless.
Capt. Spaulding: Well, see that you remain that way.

Capt. Spaulding: You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, which doesn't say much for you.

Capt. Spaulding: Why, you've got beauty, charm, money! You have got money, haven't you? Because if you haven't, we can quit right now.

— Animal Crackers



Groucho: I'll thank you to let me do the reporting around here. Is it true you're getting a divorce as soon as your husband recovers his eyesight? Is it true you wash your hair in clam broth? Is it true you used to dance in a flea circus?

Groucho: You're just wasting your breath, and that's no great loss either.

Groucho: With a little study you'll go a long ways, and I wish you'd start now.

— Monkey Business



Frank: Dad, let me congratulate you. I'm proud to be your son.
Professor Wagstaff: My boy, you took the words right out of my mouth. I'm ashamed to be your father. You're a disgrace to our family name of Wagstaff, if such a thing is possible.

Professor Wagstaff: You know you've got the brain of a four-year old child, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it.

Professor Wagstaff: I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you arrived.

Professor Wagstaff: Why don't you go home to your wife? I'll tell you what, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement she'll never know the difference.

— Horse Feathers



Rufus T. Firefly: Well, that covers a lot of ground. Say, you cover a lot of ground yourself. You better beat it - I hear they're going to tear you down and put up an office building where you're standing. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.

Rufus T. Firefly: Not that I care, but where is your husband?
Mrs. Teasdale: Why, he's dead.
Rufus T. Firefly: I bet he's just using that as an excuse.
Mrs. Teasdale: I was with him to the very end.
Rufus T. Firefly: No wonder he passed away.
Mrs. Teasdale: I held him in my arms and kissed him.
Rufus T. Firefly: Oh, I see, then it was murder. Will you marry me? Did he leave you any money? Answer the second question first.

Rufus T. Firefly: Married. I can see you right now in the kitchen, bending over a hot stove. But I can't see the stove.

Rufus T. Firefly: Maybe you can suggest something. As a matter of fact, you do suggest something. To me you suggest a baboon.
Ambassador Trentino: What?
Rufus T. Firefly: I, uh, I'm sorry I said that; it isn't fair to the rest of the baboons.

Rufus T. Firefly: You're a brave man. Go and break through the lines. And remember, while you're out there risking your life and limb through shot and shell, we'll be in be in here thinking what a sucker you are.

Rufus T. Firefly: Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did.

— Duck Soup

[Iggo]

24. "Don't leave in a huff. Leave in a minute and a huff."

I don't remember which movie that was from, but I've been laughing at that one since I was a little kid.

Heheheh...Marx Brothers.

[Oeditpus Rex]

39. 'Duck Soup'

"You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff."

[Iggo]

43. That's the one!

My memory has warped it over these many years, but that's the one.

[Hardrada]

25. I think those are all great. And they were rapid fire too so you

had to be paying attention and not trying to put your dick into a popcorn box to surprise your date!

[Forkboy]

69. I used to stay up late to watch their movies as a kid.

We had this late night show on weekend nights B.C. (Before Cable) called Great Entertainment that showed classic movies. About once a month they showed the Marx Brothers, and I would always make sure to watch them. Timeless comedy.

[petronius]

23. One of my favorite Lawrence of Arabia scenes:

Auda abu Tayi: It is Auda of the Howitat who speaks.
Sherif Ali: It is Ali of the Harith who answers.
Auda abu Tayi: Harith! Ali, does your father still steal?
Sherif Ali: No. Does Auda take me for one of his own bastards?
Auda abu Tayi: No, there is no resemblance. Alas, you resemble your father.
Sherif Ali: Auda flatters me.
Auda abu Tayi: You're easily flattered. I knew your father well.
Sherif Ali: Did you know your own?

[Hardrada]

26. That part got by me. I own that DVD and I'm going to have to watch

that again.

[petronius]

29. It's right after they cross the desert, and Auda discovers them getting

water from his wells. One of many great exchanges between Ali and Auda...

[Hardrada]

30. I knew there was something going on there!

[krispos42]

27. "Everything was fine until our power grid was shut off by dickless here"

Dr. Raymond Stantz: Everything was fine until our power grid was shut off by dickless here.

Walter Peck: They caused an explosion!

Mayor: <To Peter> Is this true?

Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes, it's true. <slight pause> This man has no dick. <Peck then tries to attack Dr. Venkman, but is kept away by others in the room> Well, that's what I heard!

From the movie Ghostbusters.



:-)

[Hardrada]

28. I remember that now. Funny!

[Adsos Letter]

31. "Seven Days in May"

Burt Lancaster as General James Mattoon Scott: "Are you up enough on your Bible, Jiggs, to know who Judas was?"

Kirk Douglas as Colonel Martin "Jiggs" Casey: "Yes, I know who Judas was. He was a man I worked for and admired until he disgraced the four stars on his uniform."


I LOVE that movie...

[Hardrada]

32. I like that flick a lot. Also remember that Judas admiral who

gets cold feet!

[Adsos Letter]

33. That carrier scene is one of my favorite scenes in the movie...

"I wish I had more time"

"Well unfortuneately, Admiral, you don't" (tosses pen at him)


I LOOOOVE THAT MOVIE!

[Mad_Dem_X]

35. From Titanic:

"I'd rather be his whore than your wife."

[Mad_Dem_X]

36. From A Fish Called Wanda:

Jamie Lee Curtis to Kevin Kline: "I've owned dresses with higher IQ's!"

That movie is full of great insults, but that's the only one I can think of right now.

[Oeditpus Rex]

40. 'I was dealing with something delicate, Otto.

I'm setting up a guy who's incredibly important to us, who's going to tell me where the loot is and if they're going to come and arrest you. And you come loping in like Rambo without a jockstrap and you dangle him out a fifth-floor window. Now, was that smart? Was it shrewd? Was it good tactics? Or was it stupid?"

"Don't call me stupid."

"Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I've known sheep that could outwit you! I've worn dresses with higher IQs! But you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape?"

"Apes don't read philosophy."

"Yes they do, Otto; they just don't understand it. Now let me correct you on a couple of things, okay? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not 'Every man for himself.' And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked them up."



"Don't call me stupid."

"Why on earth not?"

"Oh, you English are so superior, aren't you? Well, would you like to know what you'd be without us, the good ol' U S of A to protect you? I'll tell you: the smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that's what! So don't call me stupid, lady. Just thank me!"

"Well, thank you for popping in and protecting us."

"If it wasn't for us, you'd all be speaking German, singing 'Deutschland, Deutschland über alles...'"



"You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, fuck-face, dickhead, asshole!"

"How very interesting. You're a true vulgarian, aren't you?"

"You're the vulgarian, you fuck!"



"I'm sorry about my brother, Ken. I know he's insensitive. He's had a hard life. Dad used to beat him up."

"Good."

[TZ]

47. "Don't call me stupid"!!!lol- I love that character!

That movie is still one of the funniest things I have ever seen! And thats a GREAT scene.
S'okay Oedi..did you cheat..or did you type that from memory?;-)

[Oeditpus Rex]

63. A little of both

IMDb is a great friend to an incomplete memory. :)

[Mad_Dem_X]

53. !

:applause:

[Hardrada]

49. I just saw that one. Think it was on TCM. Great flick.

[Bertha Venation]

37. Bill Murray to Dustin Hoffman: "You slut."

"Tootsie"

[jakefrep]

38. From Shaft (the original):

(in a small Italian restaurant)

Mafia goon: I'm lookin' for a nigga named John Shaft.

Shaft: You just found him, WOP!

[jcla]

41. Will Smith in Bad Boyz

coming into an exclusive house in an all White neighborhood.. (guns drawn, of course) "Don't be alarmed...were Negroes!"

[Initech]

42. "Fucking dipshit with a nine-toed woman." - The Big Lebowski

[Orsino]

44. "Do thou amend thy face, and I'll amend my life."

Falstaff to Bardolph in Henry IV, Part 1, well-delivered by Robbie Coltrane in Branagh's Henry V.

See the same movie for Brian Blessed's royal diss of the Prince Dauphin, who asks: "What to {me} from England?"

"Scorn and defiance. Slight regard, contempt,
And anything that may not misbecome
The mighty sender, doth he prize you at."

[BlueIris]

60. Ah, "Henry V."

"For this revolt of thine, methinks, is like
Another fall of man."

[Inchworm]

48. This isn't France, but if you want to go around all day smelling like a nutsack...

Mr. Woodcock

I had to pause it I was laughing so hard.

:hi:

[Hardrada]

54. Not bad!

[LanternWaste]

50. Glengary Glenn Ross-- the brutality of Baldwin's character is epic...

His motivational speech to some less than stellar real estate salesmen after one of them asks him, "who are you...?" He throws his Rolex on the desk as though it's little more than used toilet paper and says,


"That watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave."

[Hardrada]

57. That's one I've got to see.

[LanternWaste]

59. It's a tough movie to watch...

It's a tough movie to watch-- tough in the sense of absolutely nothing nothing nice about it, absolutely no sympathetic character, life being portrayed as hard, brutal and as inhumane as an office can be. In terms of toughness to watch, I'd put it up there with Schindler's List.

Baldwin's character steals the show though, and (IMO) does a better job than even Pacino and Jack Lemming.

[CrownPrinceBandar]

78. You stole mine!.........

"Coffee's for closers!"

[BlueIris]

51. Bruce Willis in "The Last Boyscout" to one of their weapon-wielding enemies: "You know what they

say about guys with guns?"

(pregnant pause)

"Little dicks."

The director must have loved the irony in making Bruce Willis say that.

[jobycom]

52. How about insults to entire countries?

Casablanca

Rick: If it's December 1941 in Casablanca, what time is it in New York?
Sam: What? My watch stopped.
Rick: I'd bet they're asleep in New York. I'd bet they're asleep all over America.

[Hardrada]

56. Those count too!

I am too dull-witted right now to think of any but those do count. Insults to sections of the country too.

[Missy Vixen]

55. "Get Shorty" is full of them, but the only one I can think of at the moment

is Dennis Farina's character stepping on Gene Hackman's character's head: "Fuck off, fuckball."

Julie

[Hardrada]

58. A most vivid scene!

[unpossibles]

62. "you're outta your element, Donnie!" nt

[On the Road]

65. "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf" Had Some Great Insults:

Martha: I swear to GOD George, if you even EXISTED I'd divorce you.
------------

George: Martha, in my mind you're buried in cement right up to the neck. No, up to the nose, it's much quieter.
------------

George: You're a monster - You are.
Martha: I'm loud and I'm vulgar, and I wear the pants in the house because somebody's got to, but I am not a monster. I'm not.
George: You're a spoiled, self-indulgent, willful, dirty-minded, liquor-ridden...
------------

George: Now that's it! You can take over a few classes from the older men, but until you start plowing pertinent wives, you really aren't working. The broad, inviting avenue to man's job is through his wife, and don't you forget it.
Nick: And I'll bet your wife has the broadest, most inviting avenue on the whole damn campus.
------------

[On the Road]

66. Ben Kingsley in "Sexy Beast" Had Some Great Insults

Don: Shut up, cunt. You louse. You got some fuckin' neck ain't you. Retired? Fuck off, you're revolting. Look at your suntan, it's leather, it's like leather man, your skin. We could make a fucking suitcase out of you. Like a crocodile, fat crocodile, fat bastard. You look like fucking Idi Amin, you know what I mean? Stay here? You should be ashamed of yourself. Who do you think you are? King of the castle? Cock of the walk?

(He gut-punches Gal)

Don: What you think this is the wheel of fortune? You think you can make your dough and fuck off? Leave the table? 'Thanks Don, see you Don, off to sunny Spain now Don, fuck off Don.' Lying in your pool like a fat blob laughing at me, you think I'm gonna have that? You really think I'm gonna have that, ya ponce. All right, I'll make it easy for you. God knows you're fucking trying. Are you gonna do the job? It's not a difficult question, are you gonna do the job, yes or no?
-----------------------

Don: You're the problem! You're the fucking problem you fucking Dr White honkin' jam-rag fucking spunk-bubble! I'm telling you Aitch you keep looking at me I'll put you in the fucking ground, promise you!
-----------------------

Don: You got very nice eyes, DeeDee. Never noticed them before. They real?
-----------------------

[Forkboy]

71. One of my favorite movies.

Kingsley is always pretty good, but he takes it up a few notches in this one. The rest of the cast is excellent too, especially Ray Winstone (who is also great in The Proposition). The scene near the beginning where they tell Gal that Don Logan is coming is acting perfection. He hasn't even arrived and the body language changes instantly just at the mention of his name. No words are spoken, but the actors make it clear that Logan is bad news. And Kingsley is majorly intense. :)

[On the Road]

72. I Swear to God,

I have NEVER seen anything like the emotional impact of that performance. Sheer force of pathological will. I was shaking when I left the theater.

[Forkboy]

74. He was scary as hell.

I think he was even scarier when he was calm. You could see him smoldering inside.

"I'm not swearing. Why are you swearing?"

Alrighty then. Intense much, Ben? :)

It's easily one of the best performances I've ever seen, and I can think of a lot great ones.

[Jamastiene]

67. "Don't fuck with me fellas! This ain't my first time at the rodeo."

Mommie Dearest

[flvegan]

70. Goodfellas: "Now go home and get your fucking shinebox."

[Forkboy]

73. "Sit down and shut up, you big bald fuck!"

"Ah, save your breath for cooling your porridge."

"So, you are obviously the big dick. The men on the side of ya are your balls. There are two types of balls. There are big brave balls, and there are little mincey faggot balls. Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two small mincey faggot balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties mangled up. There's no pussy here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your gun...And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O"...written down the side of mine...should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... Fuck off!"

"Listen, you fucking fringe, if I throw a dog a bone, I don't want to know if it tastes good or not. You stop me again whilst I'm walking, and I'll cut your fucking Jacobs off."

"Pull your tongue out of my arsehole, Gary. Dogs do that. You're not a dog, are ya Gary?"

"Blagged? Speak English to me, Tony. I thought this country spawned the fucking language, and so far nobody seems to speak it."

[Hardrada]

76. That's impressive! Another one I've got to check out.

[HEyHEY]

75. Mallrats:

Banky: "He's got a bladder like an infant"
Girl: "Funny, he says you're hung like one."
Banky: "Does his mother tell him everything?"

[Hardrada]

77. I've heard that was a clever flick!

[Lethe]

81. In True Grit, she says Texans "cultivate their hair like lettuce."

I always found that profoundly funny and insulting without actually knowing what it meant. And Glen Campbell ain't no Texican.

[Iggo]

82. I read reply #44, and it jogged this memory.

From 'Valley Girl'.

"Is this movie 3D?"

"No. But your face is."

:rofl:

[Dragonbreathp9d]

83. Garden State

Large to Mark "Pun intended?"

in response to "Don't talk about Knights around Mark, its a sore subject" - Large

"I'm gonna kill that motherfucker" - Mark

[GoddessOfGuinness]

84. From My Fellow Americans

Genny: I'm sorry about that, sir. We're Republican.
Former President Matt Douglas: Well, at least you can admit it. That's the first step towards recovery.

[Hardrada]

85. That is a timely bit of dialogue!

[MilesColtrane]

86. Not from a movie...

But, you can't beat Sybil Fawlty calling Basil an "aging, brilliantine stick-insect".

In the same episode he calls her a "rancorous, coiffeured, old sow".

In another episode Basil relates that Sybil's laugh sounds like "someone machine-gunning a seal".

[Arugula Latte]

87. Nobody does insults like the Brits.

They kick our sorry Yank bum-bums in that department.

[Hardrada]

88. I bought that series because I was sure I wasn't catching everything.

Great stuff.