Do you have feelings of inadequacy?

[graywarrior]

Do you suffer from Shyness?

Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or
pharmacist about Chardonnay.

Chardonnay is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident
about yourself and your actions. Chardonnay can help ease you out of your
shyness and let you tell the world that you are ready and willing to do
just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Chardonnay almost immediately and with
a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you
from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a
thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you
had.


Stop hiding and start living, with Chardonnay.


Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration,
erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money,
loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headaches,
dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night
rounds of Strip Poker, Truth or Dare and naked Twister.

WARNINGS:

The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you are whispering
when you are not.

The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends
over and over again that you love them.

The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to think you can sing.

The consumption of Chardonnay may lead you to believe that ex
lovers are really dying for you to call/text them at 2 : 04 in the
morning.

The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you can logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

The consumption of Chardonnay may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

[LeftyFingerPop]

1. I prefer either LaBattonnay or Whiskeysauvignon.

[graywarrior]

4. I always started my nights with white Russians

But the end of the night, it was black Russians, tears streaming down my face, someone getting beat up in the parking lot, and me hiding out for a month.

[vard28]

2. Tequilaonnay for me

My clothes usually end up somewhere other than on my body. That's usually an icebreaker in my book.

[applegrove]

3. LOL! Very funny.

[MrCoffee]

5. No

I'm awesome in every way imaginable.

[Oeditpus Rex]

6. If Chardonnay isn't right for you, ask your doctor about