any advisors to the lovelorn???? (yes another rant) LOL

[lost-in-nj]

I have this guy that is really great, treats me like a queen (after our "space"" talk)
and tells me my eyes are beautiful.....

so I am hurting
I can't trust him even though its not his fault
I can not let him in 100%
I am so afraid of being hurt again I can't do it....
even tried to say good bye tonight

how do I let go of the hurt and pain...?

how do I trust and let him in????

fuck

this sucks.... I really didn't realize how hard this would be....

thanks

:hug:



I know I have been a drama queen lately
and I really am sorry


lost

[Aristus]

1. Give it time. That's the only advice I can give.

This situation sounds a lot like the one my (now) wife and I were in; she had just divorced an abuser two weeks before we started dating. I was supposed to be her "rebound" relationship. We fell in love pretty quickly, but she held back, unable to trust her feelings. She told me time and time again that she would never remarry. So our attitude was "let's just enjoy this while it lasts". We never fell out of love, and four years later, I finally convinced her to marry me. We've been married nine and a half years, and are still crazy about each other.

Just give it time...

If he really is great, it will be worth it... B-)

[lost-in-nj]

2. thanks

I have already told him I will never marry again.......


I have the same attitude..... :hug:


I am SO happy for you
and happy to hear this......


lost

[Generic Brad]

3. Boy, if any of us here knew how to mend a broken heart....

...all would be right with the world. I, for one, do not think you're being a drama queen. It's really hard to move on sometimes. Having your heart broken is probably the hardest thing to experience in a lifetime.

I had my heart broken when I was really young and it took years to get past it. Some of us heal faster than others. Some of us scar deep and the pain always feels like its right there below the surface. The higher the high, the lower the low. Many of us here can empathize with what you're feeling.

And there is nothing wrong with feeling the way you do.

[lost-in-nj]

4. Thank you.....

thank you


:hug:

it was 30 years.....

so yeah it's hard

but I appreciate your post



lost

[BeachBaby]

5. It's so hard to allow someone new to handle your heart....

when the life's been squeezed out of it by another, isn't it?

And then, when we do, we're waiting for the other shoe to drop....so in order for that NOT to happen, we sabotage the relationship so as not to have to re-live the pain a second time.

I've been there, lost. And I'm there with you right now.

Love.

:hug: