The character word of the week is "epic shiznit"

[Bossy Monkey]

A local elementary school has a hung-letter sign that includes a weekly "character word." This time around, it's "citizenship." Even without resorting to the Internet Anagram Server, I was able to determine that one alternative would be "epic shiznit". (Another is "Zen tic is hip," but I'm not sure that makes sense strictly speaking.)

Yeah I know it's two words (or four), but if I actually went and got a letter-hanging pole and changed the sign, poor grammar would probably be the least of my problems.

[Jackpine Radical]

1. Every summer there is this huge event called Country Fest

a few miles from where I live. The Chamber of Commerce put up a moveable-letter sign saying "Welcome Country Fest Goers" and every time I went by the sign I defaced it in my mind. I might have actually added a letter or two if I could have decided on the better message alteration:

Welcome Country Fest Goobers
or
Welcome Country Fest Gomers

[Bossy Monkey]

2. Wouldya believe "Gomers' woeful concrete sty"

For this one, I broke down and went to Internet Anagram Server http://www.wordsmith.org/anagram/
For some reason, they offered many many strange words for this set of letters.