How does the 'friends with benefits' thing work, anyway?

[Oeditpus Rex]

I mean, how does one go about initiating or proposing it?



Is alcohol necessarily involved?



:shrug:

[PassingFair]

1. You have to have an actual friend first....

:)

[Lil Missy]

2. Also known as a "fuck-buddy". Alcohol is optional.

As far as initiating or proposing such an arrangement, I don't know.

[khashka]

9. Not Quite

As the resident slut...

A fuck buddy is someone you get together with for sex.

A friend with benefits is a friend - someone you hang with and sometimes have sex with.

But the former can become the latter.

Khash.

[madinmaryland]

3. Depends on the state you are in.

Some states allow you to have the same benefits as your partner!

:crazy:

[Chan790]

4. As a resident expert...

1.)Let's just say it doesn't...not in any sort of real sense. Eventually, usually somebody gets hurt, offended, feels used, or feels abandoned when their friend with benefits finds someone they want to have a monogamous relationship with. Ergo, your best friend, your sister's best friend and co-workers are very bad choices.

2.)It's easier to propose it to someone you've slept with before.

3.)A good FWB has a time limit. The longer it goes on the more likely #1 occurs.

4.)You're friends, you continue to do friend things without the expectation of sex every time. Nor is the only time you call your FWB when you're horny and it's 4am.

5.) Liquor is a social lubricant, yes. Sometimes it's too much of one. Ask when you're sober enough to maintain your head and read social cues, but have been drinking enough that if the suggestion goes badly you can blame the hooch the following day.

You know...I think I'm going to suggest they let me write a "For dummies" book about this.

[Runcible Spoon]

6. I would also add...

don't put too much pressure on your FWB to have mind blowing sex. If there are no fireworks, it's not anybody's fault and it should not be discussed ad nauseum about WHY the arrangement didn't work out. Yeah, still be friends but it doesn't need to get explicitly mentioned.

My experience:

Had a friend who I used to just make out with randomly because, well, I like to make out and am not always in a relationship. When I was, this friend would sometimes join in me and my BF. The one time I actually slept with just him, it was the night of the funeral of one of our good friends. I just felt like it was a way to be there for him. The sex was really bad but the emotional connection was important for him at the time. We didn't ever do that again and the fact that it was bad, for me at least, doesn't need to get dissected.

[khashka]

12. Chan's right

I would add the friendship comes first, the sex is just a nice addition.

But be careful, sometimes it's just sex for you but they take it as more. And when it ends (as it always does) they feel hurt and used.

Khash.

[jobycom]

5. Don't ask me, I haven't had either in years.

:rofl:

or should that be :cry:

[Connonym]

7. Sheesh, haven't I laid the groundwork enough?

shall I get a big sign that says "let's just get drunk and ____"? See, you really need to move to WI, I'll explain everything.

[Oeditpus Rex]

8. Aye, there's the rub

See, you really need to move to WI

High among the lack of rather crucial benefits is my lack of a teleportation device. :(

[Chan790]

10. So...buy a Vespa.

They cheap, get 90mpg. Most state no need no license. vroom vroom good!

[Call Me Wesley]

13. I gave you a whole frakkin' starship,

and you can't figure out how to use the transporter yet? Use the shuttles, then!



And I relieve you as a Captain of it. You're going to sell Albatross in the holodeck from now on ...

[Oeditpus Rex]

14. I can't figure out

how to get that sumbitch out of second gear. x(

[Call Me Wesley]

16. You just have to

move the three things all the way up. Then the buzzing sound starts, and you're going to be scanned on the quantum level using a molecular imaging scanner.


At this point, Heisenberg compensators take into account the position and direction of all subatomic particles composing Ödi and create a map of the physical structure being disassembled amounting to billions of kiloquads of data (that's a third my Ipod can hold.)

Simultaneously, Ödi is converted into subatomic particles, also called the matter stream (don't do anything there I wouldn't do.) The matter stream is briefly stored in a pattern buffer while the system compensates for Doppler shift to the destination (heh heh, I said 'Doppler!')

That's how it looks from your perspective then:


The matter stream is then transmitted to its destination (in your case, the Connonym system of ultimate joy) via a subspace frequency (check your police scanner - you won't pick it up.) As with any type of transmission of energy or radiation, scattering and degradation of the signal must be monitored closely (don't let me operate the console, or something will degrade for sure.) The annular confinement beam (ACB) acts to maintain the integrity of the information contained in the beam. Finally, the initial process is reversed and the object or individual is reassembled at the destination (well, if you're lucky, that is!)

[Oeditpus Rex]

21. I signed aboard this forum to spot camels

Not to have my atoms scattered back and forth across space by that gadget.

[Call Me Wesley]

22. I know:

So, in, errr, three years you've spotted no camels? But there's a functional transporter you won't use? That makes you a penny short Ödi.

[Oeditpus Rex]

24. Oh, you're no fun anymore!

Hey, can you make that into a flashie-blinkie thing? :rofl:

[Call Me Wesley]

27. What,

the neon sign?

[Oeditpus Rex]

29. No, the paper one over your head that says 'Duh'

Yeah, the neon sign, you twit! :P

[Call Me Wesley]

31. Give me a day,

I have to make one from scratch since this one was just done with an online sign generator.

I'll make you a 'duh' one, too ...

Aye ... but think o' the money dear ... £18.10.0d a blinking letter ...that's ... £900,000,000 - and that's without flashing sporrans!

[Oeditpus Rex]

32. Will you have to do it in two goes?

:yourock:

[Call Me Wesley]

33. Give me three goes ...

I have to read through the Podgorny tutorials first ...

[Oeditpus Rex]

35. It's fairly simple

First, force the camel to drop the banana. Then, eat the banana, with some cold consomme or a gazpacho, then some sausages with spring greens, sauteéd potatoes and bread and gravy.









And the occasional pheasant.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

11. do you want a friend with benefits or a regular fuck buddy?

those two are gotten in seperate ways

one can become another etc

[Oeditpus Rex]

15. I didn't realize there was a difference

I'm not "hep" to this "jive lingo." :blush:

[Phillycat]

20. A friend with benefits, you're friends and you also f___ occasionally.

A fuck buddy is someone who you only call when you want to get laid. Both of you understand and desire this arrangement.

Of the two, the 2nd is much less likely to get messy, and usually better sex.

...from what I hear.

[Oeditpus Rex]

26. Ahhhh

Enlightenment is teh r0XXOr. :)



I'd prefer the former, but I've decided this thread's moot, anyway, since I'd never have the nerve to ask her or even hint at it.

[Chan790]

34. You shouldn't give up so easily.

Really...how do you know that she wouldn't just love L-O-V-E love a lovely mid-evening romp betwixt the sheets if one never asks?

[Oeditpus Rex]

36. I'd rather wonder what might have been

than risk her thinking I'm a pev and ending our friendship.

[undeterred]

17. It just happens.

The dating thing doesn't work out but you still like each other so you keep doing fun things together, including sex. No alcohol needed. You can't take it too seriously, you have to be very honest, and you need to know when to let go.

[RetroLounge]

18. Not to sure about FWB's or FB's

but for a relationship it helps to be in the same state I found...

:cry:

RL

[DarkTirade]

19. Depends entirely on the friend.

I had one friend who was just completely open sexually and would have needed no overtures. Had I found her the slightest bit attractive, I probably woulda gone for it too. :P

[Bucky]

23. Once again, it's... *"The Idiots Guide to Obtaining a 'Friend with Benefits' "*

Step One: Look around for someone you would like to sleep with (i.e. "have sex" with)

Step Two: Comb your hair

Step Three: Walk up to this person and ask, "Pardon me, but can I have sex on demand with you? Not a real relationship, just sex."

Step Four: Have sex with this person

Step Five (the most important step!): Do not cuddle.

Caveat emptor: This does not work with women.

[Chan790]

25. That wouldn't work with me either...

Step 3 is ever so icky-worded. That person, the one who would use those words, has sex like a dead fish.

[Bucky]

28. Okay, let me just tell you something, Chan790....

If you've never tried sex with a dead fish, don't disparage sex with a dead fish.

[undeterred]

30. My sister tried to have sex with a dead fish for 16 years.

Then she divorced him and found a live one. :shrug: