Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart -- Finally

[teach1st]

"Shut that noise off!!" My dad liked Monk and Miles, but he couldn't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Just wait until I get out of this house!" I thought.

"Bad vibes!" The others in the communal situation liked the Beatles and Joni Mitchell, but they couldn't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Time to split," I thought.

"What kind of crap are you playing?" My old lady liked Black Sabbath and ELP. But she couldn't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Grounds for a break-up?" I thought. And we did. The kids stayed with me.

"Dad, that's gross. You're embarrassing us!" whined my daughters. They liked Poison and Guns & Roses, but they couldn't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Just wait until you grow up," I thought.

"You're stuck in the sixties," sniffed my girlfriend. She liked Talking Heads and Cure, but she couldn't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Is the sex worth it?" I thought. Eventually it wasn't.

"Meeouwgh!" hissed my cats today. They like mice and mating screams, but they don't appreciate my Dead, Zappa, and Beefheart. "Screw 'em!" I thought. "I've waited long enough."

[SmileyBoy]

1. They should've named it "Captain Bee Fart".

:D:D:D:D:D:D

[Webster Green]

2. Ha Ha Ha...that is a problem I can relate to....

And its not like I hit them with "Billy the Mountain" or "Thingfish" right away. I mean I tried to be gentle.

Oh well!

[CrownPrinceBandar]

3. "Studebaker Hawk....

YEAH!!! Stu-de-baker Hawk!" I haven't thought of "Billy the Mountain" in years.

My ex-girlfriend hated Zappa. She thought he was mysogonistic an crude. Once, an ill-timed playing of "Joe's Garage" about caused our breakup. For some reason, she was unamused by "Crew Slut". I wonder why?

[Webster Green]

4. Don't even think about playing "Magdalena" !

Yipes!

[woofless]

6. Shoulda hit her with Dynah Mo Hum!

[CrownPrinceBandar]

8. Thought about it...

but didn't go there.

I explained that Zappa cut on everybody, regardless of sex, creed, national origin, etc.. She didn't buy it. I had to listen to my Zappa in private from then until it was over. Now I'm FREE! FREE!

[FlashHarry]

5. "Safe as Milk:" Greatest Rock 'n' Roll record ever?

I vote, "Yes!"

[Zomby Woof]

7. I get a lukewarm response lol

And I started with "Hot Rats" and "One Size Fits All" - not "Jazz From Hell" or "Weasels Ripped My Flesh". :D

[geniph]

9. Call any vegetable

call it by na-a-ame...

Yup, I've had a few relationships that could tolerate my fondness for the Dead (hell, even my dyed-in-the-wool old-time-country-fan dad liked the Dead), but not a one has ever appreciated my Zappa. Men are just so damn conventional sometimes.

;-)

...and her name is P-I-N-K-Y...

[mitchum]

10. My SO really likes Beefheart...

especially the twisted Delta stuff, but she hates Zappa- "Sophomoric and wanky!"

[Kat45]

11. I've brought a couple of guys to Zappa concerts.

They didn't hate it, but didn't love it either. :shrug: