Op Ed: "I Happen To Be In The Neighborhood And Horny"

[matcom]

<snip>

Hey, how's it going? I'm sorry, were you sleeping? I guess it's kinda late. I know we haven't seen each other in a long time, but I was in the neighborhood, and I saw your light on, so I thought I'd drop by and see if you'd have sex with me.

So, how are you doing these days? I'm good; things have been good. Right this minute, I'm pretty horny, though. Why don't I come in so we can catch up on old times and have sex?

Boy, it must have been at least nine months since the last time we talked. Can you believe it? I know I can't. I would have come by sooner, but I've been busy at work, and I was getting laid pretty regularly there for a while. I was in this area a few weeks ago, but I didn't see your light on, and I wasn't in the mood. But tonight, well, that's a different story.

How have you been? Let me just step inside here... The place looks nice! Come on, don't be silly! You know what a slob I am. Remember my apartment? Dirty dishes, clothes everywhere. I see you moved the couch over against the window. Good idea. Really opens up the place. Hey, you didn't have blinds before, did you? Those must be new. Why don't we shut them?

more:

http://www.theonion.com/4005/opinion1.html

[radwriter0555]

1. Yeah. I remember that guy...

He's an idiot.