I left one abusive relationship...

[laylah]

WHY in the hell did I walk into another? :cry:

[Midlodemocrat]

1. Get out. Get out now.

[laylah]

2. ...

you are so special :hug: thank you so much for your response. I am an educated woman...wtF do I continue to make bad choices??????

[theredpen]

10. Education and "brains" don't factor in...

You are fighting an enemy with just as much education and intelligence as — and more information than — you have: your subconscious. You are unlikely to defeat this foe without assistance. Step #1 is realizing that while your subconscious thinks she's doing something constructive, she's not on your side at all.

Good luck. I think we've all had this battle to one degree or another and I can say from personal experience that you can win, you just have to want it; sounds like you do.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

3. You need to figure out the answer to that before you get involved with anybody else.

:hug::hug::hug:
It's very common, and has nothing to do with intelligence; so don't put yourself down, ok?
Human nature makes us seek out relationships that have familiar dynamics...even if what is familiar is abusive. Are you seeing a counselor? Working with the right person can help you break your harmful habits and steer you in the direction of healthy relationships.
:hug::hug::hug:

[Shakespeare]

4. PLEASE don't do that to yourself--get out now.

There are better men out there, trust me. :hug:

[laylah]

5. What wonderful

spirits you all are. IMVHO...i am stuck..The father of my children took them away from me so I need to overcome THAT

[some guy]

9. Please don't think that.

You're only stuck if you allow yourself to be. You really should get out, for your own sake.

The best way to overcome losing your children to their father is to gain you. Get out of the relationship and spend some time nurturing you.

:hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

6. My dear laylah...

Could it be that unconsciously you feel you deserve this abusive relationship?

Whatever the reason, get out now, and get help!

Break the cycle!

You. Deserve. Better.

:hug:

[laylah]

7. I come here for the

warm support and the things I can hold on to...thank you...I love this place! That said...I am off to bed. Tomorrow is always better

[sasquatch]

8. Because you're in a cycle of abusive relationships that goes back to your ancestors

[radfringe]

11. many years ago a friend of mine

went through a few abusive relationships, mostly on the emotional abuse, not physical. The guys she would hook-up with were cut from the same cloth.

after one especially bad relationship, she started seeing a therapist. The therapist said that it isn't uncommon to keep getting involved with the "same person" over and over again until you get it right.

Eventually, she recognized the pattern in the guys she had hooked up with, what it was that attracted her to them.

Not going to happen overnight, going to take time. She abstained from dating for quite awhile and worked on herself.

yeah, there's a happy ending. She met and married a teriffic guy and they have a very happy life together.