What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?

[youthere]

Or that has happened to you?
My personal best would be at a Christmas party a couple years ago. I got ready to go, spritzed on some perfume, and when we got to the party I gave everyone a hug and just had myself a hell of a good time...I noticed though, when I was sitting on the couch that SOMEONE had horrible BO. I mean..it was bad...it smelled like skunk. It wasn't until we left the party that I realized that I could still smell the BO, and I thought...jeez...mryouthere really stinks. Finally about halfway home my darling husband says "Christ! Did you step in something?"
Well..it turned out..the perfume I had spritzed on had "turned" on me-it had totally reacted with my body chemistry. I had gotten as a gift from a coworker and that was the first time I had used it. I still blush at the thought of being remembered as the "stinky lady" at the party.

[Name removed]

1. Deleted message

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[youthere]

2. I'm afraid I'm going to have to have some pictures.

[Cabcere]

3. I got pantsed by a treadmill once.

In the very front of a crowded gym.

Facing a mirrored wall.

Yep.

:hi:

[Oeditpus Rex]

10. Uh...

Nah... I'd better not. :blush:

[Cabcere]

13. ...

...PM? :evilgrin: :shrug: :hi:

[RubyDuby in GA]

4. The time I thought I was being totally funny by demonstrating the Thigh Master at Sears

They actually had them on the shelves! I was there with my mom and dad. Dad had wondered off so it was just me and my mom looking up and down the aisles. I have absolutely no idea why we were in the Sporting Goods department or why they had the Thigh Master there, but being the smartass that I am I picked it up and said something stupid like Look at me I'm Suzanne Somers. Then I put it between my legs to give it a good squeeze and it goes flying out from behind me and knocks everything off the shelf behind me. My mom takes off like she doesn't even know me and the guy who was on the other end of the aisle doubles over laughing at me. I have never walked so fast out of a store in my life.

Who knew there was a right way and a wrong way to use them?

I think this may come in second to passing out in the trunk of my own car and falling out while trying to get out in the parking lot after a night out drinking.

Then there was the time I tried the Nordic Trac. I don't do well with exercise machinery.

[Stuart G]

39. A teacher's story..(high school freshmen =honors..)

I had assigned this book for the students to read. "The Once and Future King" And well I hadn't read it myself. So I was staying 40 or 50 pages ahead of the students when I asked this girl to marry me. She said "no" and I got all broken up for a few days. ...
..And so I assigned the last 50 pages..and guess what ..didn't read it. and I recall a student, her name was Lana..asked a question about the last 50 pages. (now what do you do?+ ...........So, I told the truth. I didn't know the answer to the question cause I didn't read it and I told them why.(about not having time..most understood but Lana).....
.....Well....Lana was indignant..and I was embarrassed. It happened over 23 years...that is it......Stuart G.

[crispini]

57. OMG I am laughing like an idiot over here.

Thanks!

[SPKrazy]

5. I Fell Through The Ceiling At My Frat House

on a parents there work day thing

I was soooooo hungover and I went above the houseparents room and stepped on the sheetrock instead of the wood part

fell right through it

no one was too happy with me and I was pretty embarrassed and sick too

caught myself before I fell all the way to the ground

:blush:

on a side note I got kicked out of that frat although that wasn't the reason, it may have had some impact in it :rofl:

[Xipe Totec]

17. That, to me, was just part of a perfect day

Visiting cousins in central Mexico.

In the short span of four hours I:

Broke the lid off a piano.

Broke a curtain rod while taking a swing at one of the maids, because she refused to serve me coffee (too young).

Let the turkeys loose from the pen.

Had one of the turkeys killed by one of the Boxer guard dogs.

Got tackled by one of the guard dogs while playing fetch, fell on one knee down an inclined cement sidewalk, and scraped a three inch patch of skin all the way to the bone.


Oh, and I fell through the ceiling onto my cousin's bedroom, while playing hide and seek.


It was the last visit to their home, evah.

:blush:


Thanks for making me remember that fateful day! :hi:

[Esra Star]

31. "whilst taking a SWING at one of the maids"

I hope you have turned into a human since that sad day.

[Xipe Totec]

48. I think so, though I still have a lot of bad karma to work out

But I don't want you to think that I didn't get severely punished for my misdeeds.

:hi:

[Esra Star]

49. Glad to hear that. Keep going. nt

[Xipe Totec]

52. I invite you to read my journal

to get a better measure of who I am.

:hi:

[Esra Star]

61. I believe you, but I will check your journal. Cheers. nt

[DS1]

65. that's awesome and perfect

[1gobluedem]

6. I told a woman with a service dog there were no pets allowed

I was in high school, working at a department store. I saw the dog before I saw the white cane and realized the woman was blind. I was mortified.

[sinkingfeeling]

7. I once baked a ham with cherry glaze for an Easter dinner only to discover I had

failed to remove a second layer of plastic wrap. One of my guests has reminded me of this incident for over 30 years now.

[NewWaveChick1981]

8. I fell flat on my ass in front of two higher-ups.

:yoiks: This was about ten years ago, and I had just started working for a college. I had to do a presentation in the building across from my office, and as I started across the street (the streets were/are cobblestones), I slipped and fell flat on my butt. :yoiks: The only two people who saw me were the VP and the president, who came running over to see if I was OK. The only thing I hurt was my pride, and I sheepishly got up and dusted myself off.

[Zavulon]

9. In a grocery store one time,

I was in line talking to my girlfriend, complaining her about a friend of mine who just became a father. Said friend and his wife were ALWAYS talking about their newborn, and always in a way designed to get the listener to admit how cute the baby was.

I'm not one of those who thinks every baby is cute, and if you aren't either you can take my word for this - the baby in question was not cute at all.

So I was saying to my girlfriend in this store something like this: "And they're always saying 'isn't he cute, isn't he adorable, couldn't you just hug him forever, isn't he amazing,' and so on, and it's enough to make anyone puke. The kid is NOT cute, and even though I was willing to lie about it I should only have to lie once, not ten fucking times an hour. If they ever invite us to dinner, go if you want, but make an excuse for me because no truck is strong enough to drag me over there."

Yep, you guessed it. My friend, his wife and their baby were about eight feet behind us in that line.

[Blarch]

Damn boy

So how did that work out for ya ? :rofl:

[Zavulon]

38. Pretty much how you'd expect.

They're not talking to me at all.

I hate to admit it, but I'm actually fine with that. I miss the barhopping fun I had with this buddy of mine before he became a dad, but I don't miss hearing about that kid at all.

[TZ]

11. I ran into a closed sliding glass door thinking it was open....

BANG! and then I slid down it slowly...Sadly for me both my father and younger sister witnessed this..My dad TRIED to be nice...He said to my sister who was laughing hysterically.."Don't laugh...ha,ha...Its not funny..ha,ha...she could have broken her nose...HA HAHAHAHA!!!" Thanks Dad!
BTB...I had to share a bed with my sister that night and I would almost be asleep and suddenly the bed would start shaking and then I would hear HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!....It was a loooong night.
That was over 20 years ago and my family STILL won't let me forget it....:blush:

[DarkTirade]

12. My stepbrother did that

and when he ran at that age, he RAN. The glass literally bowed in, we were afraid it was going to break. But instead, it just transferred the momentum back the way it came... into my brother.

So yeah, he went flying a few feet back.

The ironic part is that we were always worried about something like that happening... so we made sure to put little window clings and decorations hanging off of suction cups and whatnot to make sure you could always see the glass. He just wasn't paying attention.

[IzaSparrow]

15. I'm crying...

that is so funny :rofl:

[GRLMGC]

18. Aww, that happened to me once in a mall

My mom still laughs uncontrollably at the thought of it. I feel your pain :)

[MsKandice01]

33. I've got one even worse...

My husband recently walked through the SCREEN door. The DirecTV guy was outside on the patio trying to see if we had line of sight to put up our dish (we didn't) and my husband went bounding through the living room to tell the guy something and walked straight through the screen. It got knocked off the track and went crashing down on the concrete and the DirecTV guy was in tears laughing, as was I. How do you walk through a screen door? It's black!

[TZ]

40. LOL!

Now THAT does make me feel better....:rofl:

[TommyO]

63. I've done it also!

This was back in 1994, I'm guessing. My new partner and I were on the deck when the phone rang, I turned around and walked straight into the screen door, I bent the frame and tore the screen itself. Who was on the phone? Somebody that I had been trying to date for quite some time asking if I was free for a date, oh the irony.

[Xipe Totec]

14. Spewed Coca-Cola at my granny, across the Christmas dinner table n/t

[yellowcanine]

16. When I was training for a marathon I used to carry a roll of tp in my jacket pocket just in case I

needed to use a port a pot and there was no tp. I wore the same jacket to church and was walking across the parking lot toward the car where my wife and 2 daughters were waiting when I realized I had a "tail" unrolling behind me. Woo hoo, I will never live that one down with the family.

[IzaSparrow]

19. pooped my pants

at 4H camp.

I was like 8, sick, and on my way to the bathroom when it happened.

Meh.

[SallyMander]

20. I had a friend in college who was REALLY balding

but he grew the remaining hair out all crazy long like Einstein or something. So that's how i remembered him -- bald on top, but with this crazy do on the sides.

I ran into him a couple years after graduation, and he had buzzed it all really short. A much better look really! But before i could stop myself, out popped "wow, you have a lot less hair than last time i saw you!" Oooooops...

He laughed it off -- and knew what i meant -- but I am still embarrassed about that! :blush:

[Xipe Totec]

23. Had an obnoxious balding co-worker

in his mid 20's, who had made a habit of punctuating everybody's comments with some snarky remark.

Until one day, another co-worker, a friend of mine, stared him down and yelled:

Back off, Rogaine Boy!

The entire room exploded in laughter.

It cured him of the habit.

[SallyMander]

41. OMG!

:spray:

[Omphaloskepsis]

21. The first time I smoked weed from a bong with a carb...

I coughed when the carb was pulled and blew bongwater on about 15 people.

[mainegreen]

27. party foul.

:rofl:

[jmowreader]

22. Accidentally called my battalion commander a motherfucker

When I was in the 101st Airborne I worked for a man named Lt. Col. "Cactus Jack" McGuinness. Everyone in the battalion just loved the guy.

Anyway, 'round about December 1983 I was on a team that was getting vehicles ready to deploy from Fort Campbell to Fort Drum for a training exercise. We shipped our equipment by rail, so we had to remove a lot of the electronics and so on to keep people from climbing on the trains and stealing them. I'm under this jeep freezing my ass off tearing all this crap off the vehicle so we could have it at the railhead in two hours when someone stood next to the vehicle and blocked my light.

Apparently, the words that came from under the vehicle sounded very much like "you motherfucker, get out of my fucking light."

Colonel McGuinness bent down. "Jim, you okay under there?"

Oh fuck. I apologized most profusely..."why the hell are you apologizing to me? I was in your fucking light."

This guy McGuinness...my battalion shared a medical clinic with the 101st Division Artillery. The DIVARTY commander was Colonel Dudley L. Tademy, who is the second-biggest prick to wear the uniform in the history of the Republic--not a healthy thing to be when you command an Artillery Brigade. Anyway, one day my battalion was in the clinic getting flu shots when Tademy walked in the front door and saw a medic who he thought needed a haircut. Tademy had told this guy, four months previous, to get a haircut so obviously the dude had just farted Tademy off. Tademy fired his ass on the spot, then called the commander of the division medical unit to come get this guy and throw him out of the army. While Tademy's on the phone, McGuinness walked in the back door. The people at the back door didn't know Tademy was up there, and sounded off that there was a high-ranking officer in the building. Tademy heard it and started screaming, "next time I hear that, it had better be a general officer entering the building." Anyway, McGuinness (who fucking HATED Tademy with a passion) walked up to the front, saw Tademy and said, "God, they have an expensive answering service in this place."

[Xipe Totec]

24. My son drew weekend detention once

he had a teacher in High School with a severe lisp, which he had mastered imitating.

One day, while he was mocking the teacher in front of some friends, the teacher came up to him, called his name and my son, not aware who was calling him, turned around still in character and responded:

Yeth?

:rofl:

[SarahB]

25. About 90% of my lounge posts in 2004-2005.

Jesus H. Christ. I so needed to get my shit together. I did. I just wish I hadn't made such an ass out of myself at times.

[NewJeffCT]

28. You weren't that bad

Maybe only 75%, 80% tops...

:evilgrin:

:rofl:


just kidding, but I tend to be pretty oblivious about most of the things going on in the Lounge, so I wouldn't have noticed.

[SarahB]

29. I did a search earlier

I was trying to find something that my (now) husband said to me 4 years ago that really touched me at the time. I found other things in the thread that just made me feel like this:

:blush: :banghead: :argh:

There are bits of my life that I'd just assume disappear into cyberland forever. I guess we learn from our mistakes, but I don't feel like the same person as the person here 4 years ago.

[NewJeffCT]

34. well

your life has changed quite a bit the past few years, but I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that.

So, it's natural that your online "persona" has changed as well. You can't change what you posted 3-4 years ago, though, unless you have Bush family resources.

[Flatline]

26. I think sitting in Church, I was 6, and during

the taking of communion I let one rip...Totally by surprise mind you.

[NMDemDist2]

30. oh right, like I'm gonna tell Gawd and everyone on the internets

ain't gonna happen......


:hide:

[texas1928]

44. Chicken...

I did.

[NMDemDist2]

45. yeah, yours included a minor social gaff

mine includes alcohol and farm animals

:yoiks:

[texas1928]

46. Yeah sheep look good in lipstick.

:hide:

[NMDemDist2]

47. hehehe why would I put lipstick on a sheep?

in the condition I was in, I couldn't even get my lipstick on MYSELF!!

:rofl:

[texas1928]

32. I was a junior in High School, and it was my first year in a wheelchair.

I was in the high school band and I played the french horn. It was at the Friday pep rally for that night's football game. We were on the stage in the auditorium. And I was sitting toward the back of the back next to the tuba's and drums. One of my friends who was a tuba player was standing next to me. He decided to lean on the back of my chair, and when he did I flipped over backwards. He fell on top of me and we knocked a tuba over and it fell on the base drums that were lined up on chairs. It was a domino effect and it knocked every base drum over. Well this was during the speaker portion of the pep rally. And the minute I hit the floor, he stopped speaking and turned around to watch. I lived in a small town of 3600, and the pep rallies were broadcast on the local radio station. Well, needless to say, I hit the floor, and out of my mouth comes "FUCK". Yep, you guessed it, it was broadcast over the radio. When I got home from school, my mother looked at me and said "heard what you said on the radio." I am the only high school student in the history of my school to ever have to be bleeped out of the pep rally broadcast.

[MrMickeysMom]

35. Do you realize how hilarious this is now?

Which goes to show you, it's never as bad as it seems (seemed) !

[texas1928]

37. Oh it was funny then, my mother was not particularly happy...

But, everybody in the school that it was great. Principal wss not happy, and the band director tried to be stern but he kept laughing.

[northzax]

64. oh please tell me there is video of that

that's America's Funniest Home Videos territory.

[texas1928]

66. Thankfully...

NO.


No video.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

36. Like I'm going to talk about my embarrassing experiences on one o' them Internets!

Not a chance.

[zabet]

42. Was walking my Mom and Dad's

big pit bull. Roscoe weighed
140 pounds of AKC Purple Ribbon
Dog and I weighed 110 pounds.
Dad usually walked him around
the block every evening. Dad
had to work late so I volunteered..
bad idea. Roscoe saw a cat in
the parking lot of the conveinence
store we walked by, he took off
and proceeded to drag me, on my belly,
through a gravel parking lot.
The cat got away and I got laughed at
by some of my so-called friends.
I limped back home, bandaged my elbows,
knees, palms of my hands and salved
up my stomach and hip-bones. When one
of my brothers walked in and saw me,
he asked Mom when did I get in a car
wreck.
I haven't lived down my episode of dog
wranglin' yet.

[joneschick]

43. Have I ever told you about the time my husband and I broke the bed

at his mother's house? The support under the mattress kinda crashed. We were laughing so hard--we moved the mattress off of the debris and uh, continued. His step-dad just fixed the bed and laughed the next day. His mother never said a word. His Dad however, told us about the time, early in their marriage that *they* broke the bed at his mother's! And it wasn't even the bed they were supposed to be in!

[mokawanis]

50. I fainted

on a crowded elevator and passed gas about 6 times as I fell to the floor. My friend thought it was hilarious.

[lightningandsnow]

54. Good lord! Fainting and farting?

That takes some talent.

[Skittles]

51. I hadn't updated my address on my driver's license

when I got pulled over I told the cop I had moved within the past month - he asked me if I knew the address on my driver's license burned down a year ago :o

[lightningandsnow]

53. I hit my head on a concrete ceiling while trying to jump over a flight of stairs.

I was in grade 8 at the time. I was headed down to the school cafeteria, in a fairly joyful mood. As I was walking down the stairs, I thought, "Hmm, wouldn't it be fun to jump over the steps?"

I kind of forgot about the cement overhang-type ceiling over half of said flight of stairs.

Ouch.

[Hardrada]

55. I was about ten years old. I was taking pictures of my family

at a lake resort and while trying to get a good picture I backed right off the dock into ten feet of water. I got fished out. We then went on an excursion boat ride and I stood near the bow trying to dry out. I remember my grandmother suppressing laughter the whole trip.

[Canuckistanian]

56. Replying to a pointless Lounge post

Oops, did it again.

[jlake]

58. Fell down a flight of stairs and broke my front teeth....wait for it...

on my way out of the dentist's office after just having veneers put on.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

59. Posted in GD:P.

I can't be seen around those people. :P

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

60. I almost shot myself to death with a bow and arrow.

Yep- it really happened, believe it or not.

I was a stupid, unthinking teenager, it was a warm summer evening, I was bored. I went out into the back yard to target shoot a few arrows, but it was too dark to really see the target. Suddenly, without thinking, for absolutely no reason at all I drew back and shot an arrow up into the air, thinking it would arc forward and land in the yard in front of me (we had a BIG yard). I stood still for what seemed like a long time, listening for the "thunk". It didn't come. I said fuck it, and took one step forward. THEN I heard the "thunk"- RIGHT BEHIND ME. I turned to look, and almost crapped my pants. The arrow was deeply embedded in the ground EXACTLY WHERE I WAS STANDING A SECOND EARLIER. If I hadn't taken that one step forward that arrow would have embedded itself in the top of my head.

I still get chills when I think about how close I came just then. The incredible stupidity of the bored teenager with a lethal weapon in his hands...

[Redneck Socialist]

62. LOL! My friends and I did that too.

We taped glow sticks to the arrows and shot them around at night because it looked cool. One of my friends had the bright idea to shoot one straight up. Well the glow stick ripped off the arrow. So we're standing around looking at the glow stick laying on the lawn, not one of us giving a thought to the arrow somewhere far above us in the night sky...and THUNK! The arrow comes down just a couple of feet away from us. A few steps the other direction and one of us would have been impaled.

We put the bow away after that.

[northzax]

67. well, I don't have a picture of her handy

but she was a republican. and in my defense, I was drunk.

[Bucky]

68. Fart loud. In a courtroom with the court in session. While trying to get a girl's phone number.

Still got the number, by the way.

[cordelia]

69. Broke wind

In class.

I was in about the 8th grade. Last class of the day, and I had a little gas pain. I thought if I could just let a silent little toot, I'd feel better.

It sounded like a foghorn.

To make matters worse, I shrieked "OH MY GOD!" and put my head on my desk. Not sure why I did that, but over 30 years later I can still remember what I was wearing.

My classmates had a bit of a chuckle - more like hysteria.

[Thirtieschild]

70. Hit redial and called myself on the phone. And answered it.

Each time I hit redial the phone on the other side of the room rang. Each time I ran across the room to answer but no one was there. Took four or five tries to realize I was calling myself.

[mentalsolstice]

71. Peeing on a DC/Metro subway platform

and afterwards my husband pointed out the security camera was trained right on me. We had been out at Wolf Trap all day at a zydeco music fest...that place is great, but going to the bathroom is a chore, so I held it as long as I could.

[hunter]

72. As a young man I used to be a source of amusement for the local police.

One night (or perhaps early morning...) I decided to go skinny dipping in the ocean, which was not the oddest or most foolish thing I've ever done, but no matter. I left my clothes neatly on the beach and jumped into the surf. After I'd been out there for a long time I got out of the water and I couldn't find my clothes because it was very dark and my clothes blended in with all the kelp on the beach.

So I was walking up and down the beach naked looking for my clothes when the police arrived. Once they'd decided I wasn't under-the-influence or trying to drown myself they helped me find my clothes and sent me on my way.

Another time I was out again at night and looking like trouble when an officer who didn't know me picked me up. I didn't have any identification with me (I never did) and I seemed harmless enough so I guess he figured he'd save himself some trouble by taking me home.

At the time I was sharing a studio apartment with another guy and it wasn't uncommon for me to vanish without a word for days at a time, and that's usually when his girlfriend would sleep over. The cop and I walked up to the apartment and we could hear my roommate and his girlfriend inside having some very loud sex.

The cop listened for a moment, and then he knocked on the door anyways. Then he knocked again. My roommate's girlfriend soon opened the door and looked at me like she was going to kill me. The cop asked her if I lived there, and she paused menacingly before she said yes.