can i have some pity?

[mopinko]

waiting around until the 29th of this month when i can have my 2 bulging discs fixed. i'm in so much pain. all i can do is hang out in bed, with my laptop, and putz with a little graphic design project. but my finger is buzzing every time i hit a key.
this all started in september. i am so sick of it. i want my life, and my spine, back.
so, can i have a little company?

[Gonzo Gardener]

1. Feeling blue?

Well, here's a :hug: for you!

:hi:

How did you end up with 2 bulging discs?! Ouch!!! x(

[mopinko]

2. thanks meanie.

dunno how it happened, it just did. and then my rheumie insisted for 3 months that it wasn't a nerve thing.
they all swear it has nothing to do with my immune system, which they admit is whacked, but they don't know how or why. yeah right. i dunno. i just know i want to get it fixed, and the 29th is a long way away. looking forward to surgery is a little whacked, too. can't say i really have my heart in that.
working on this project with my new indesign, which is fun, but i am not particularly in a learning mood. makes it a little too easy to pop over here. which makes my progress slower, which....
anyway, thanks.

btw, i am going to have a couple of pieces in a show in michigan later this month. up in petosky. don't actually know where that is exactly, just that it is up north. i wish i was going up for the opening, but just can't do it. i would bring some bell's beer back with me, too. sigh

[Gonzo Gardener]

3. I know your frustration...

I was in a back crunching car wreck around 14 years ago.
Back pain is the worst thing ever. x(
I hope the surgery is a success and your pain ceases!

Petoskey is in the far N-W part of the lower peninsula. It's a picture perfect resort town about an hour North of the cottage.

Congratulations on the show! :toast:
I'd love to see some photos of your work.

[mopinko]

12. the show was an easy one.

they were short, and asked one of my colleagues at the studio to scare up some work. i am also going to be in a show in march that really is an honor. i will be sure to post a link when they put the preview up.
if i wasn't always doing shit for other people, i would have my website all updated, and could show you. kicking myself. but not too hard.

[youthere]

4. I'm sorry mopinko. That really sucks...

I was put on total bedrest the last three months of my pregnancies with my first two kids and it was torture...except I didn't have any pain. I'm so sorry...:hug:

[mopinko]

7. iiicccckkkkkk!

man. at least i never had to do that. sleeping is the worst part of those last few months. i would have jumped out the window.
thanks for the hug.

[youthere]

18. I really hope the days fly by until your surgery...

and you get some good sleep before then. My sister suffered with back pain for years, and nearly ended up in a wheelchair before she finally got surgery. She's like a different person now. Between the pain, the lack of sleep, and the time it took to get treatment, she was severely depressed-but once her surgery was over and she was (mostly ) recuperated I remember her just breaking down and sobbing with joy that finally it was over. Hang in there...things are going to get a lot better soon!:hug: again.

[mopinko]

24. sleep, i am right there with ya on that one.

DH turned into a different person when his apnea got better. been together for 25 years, and i barely recognized the guy. it had flared up badly when his tonsils enlarged on him, and he was just an awful person for a while. nearly got divorced.
talk to a doctor about sleep, tho, and they are likely to think you have 2 heads. i had been feeling a lot better before this happened, after finally getting some good treatment for fibromyalgia. better sleep helped a lot there, too. just crazy so many docs don't give it the attention that it deserves.
thanks for the :hug: back at ya.

[SPKrazy]

5. Hate buzzing

have had buzzing fingers

buzzing thigh

hope the surgery is successful and maybe your doc can give you something better for pain...

:shrug:

:hug:

[mopinko]

10. seeing a new doc tomorrow.

my regular, regular doc has been sick. of all the nerve. so i have to see someone new for the pre-op stuff. hoping for some better drugs. we'll see if i have really been labeled a head case or not. if i am in here tomorrow whining about tylenol, well.., i am just not gonna go there. but it will be bad.
the worst part about the finger is that a first year med student would have sent me for an mri when that started, but.... so every time i hit a key and go, ouch, i get a little pissed off, also.
did they do that nerve test on you where they zap you to see if you twitch? that was a lot of fun. amnesty international should do something about that one.
jesus, doctors drive me nuts.

[SPKrazy]

17. no i refused to go

i said that i could feel the electrical sensation already

so they did an mri

surgery is in my future but at the moment we have suspended the symptoms to a great degree... PT, traction, epidural injections, neurontin, but I expect that it will come a time when these discs (which apparently have herniated and very little is left of them in my neck) will have to be dealt with.

I have 3 bulging ones in my lower back that I had severe pain with several years ago, but for the most part they seem to have resolved in some way (maybe they no longer bulge?)

So at the moment no nerve conduction studies and no surgeries, knock wood.

Hope it comes out well for you with your new doc and meds, and surgery :hug:

[mopinko]

19. good luck to you in keeping symptom quiet.

i did some pt, but it went pretty badly. between the doc giving me a wrong dx, and a pt tech who was just a space cadet, it was quite a trial. did the epidural with little effect, did some big doses of neurontin, which i take anyway for fibro. i swear i could adapt to the pain, it is the gd buzzing that is making me crazy. losing strength in that arms, also, tho. since i am an artist, i sort of AM my right arm.
from what i understand, these things can resolve. not sure if they stop bulging altogether, or just shrink to where they don't bother you. most of my symptoms only really trace to the one disc, even though they look about the same.
i do swear that i got sent for that test for some reason other than want of the data. an mri seems like it would have been the obvious next step. the doc who did it swore they wont do this kind of surgery without it, tho. still :grr:

take care friend, and thanks for the pity.

[Deja Q]

6. Are they removing the discs?

[mopinko]

9. just shaving them.

a microdiscectomy. trim off the bulges, do a bone graft, and put in a titanium plate.
i am trying to be grateful that i have insurance, and good docs at a fancy hospital. but it is not working very well.

[Chovexani]

8. Here's some pity. And a mai tai.

[mopinko]

11. mmmmmmm. thanks.

my liver hates you, but thanks.
actually it has been pretty nice around here the last few days. i would have been out riding my bike with the dogs. they do NOT understand.

[mopinko]

13. thanks for the pity. i feel like a regular lizard.

going to bed now.
see you in the morning.

[Whisp]

14. all you need and then some.

sounds awful. so sorry.
hope the 29th comes soon for you and all will be better.
but that's a long way off for someone in constant pain.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

15. I hope you have some good drugs...

Mr GoG had a fusion done a few years ago. He went through hell...

I'm so sorry you're hurting! :hug::hug::hug:

[ThomCat]

16. Hi, Mopinko.

I won't give you any pity. But I'll give you some empathy and simpathy. :hug:

Please hang in there. And be well.

[mopinko]

20. i'll take it, although

i haven't engaged in too much self pity. (i don't think.) i have just gone around it, done what i could do, kept busy, and learned to do things with my left hand. something about the light at the end of the tunnel that lets you engage in some sort of analysis that you avoid when everything is unknown, tho.
dunno.
thanks, tho. i do appreciate your empathy, and your responses in the "sicky" forum.

[VenusRising]

21. I'm so sorry.

I hope that you recover quickly and are back to your old self in no time.

:hug:

[Bake]

22. NO pity. Sympathy, yes.

I had the same thing a few years back. Surgery fixed it up perfectly (cervical fusion at C6/7). In the meantime, I recommend Vicodin.

Bake

[mopinko]

23. thank you for the sympathy.

i was taking vicodin early on, and would take them now, but they did seem to be getting into a rebound pain loop after a couple weeks. and i was being pretty tight with them, only taking them at bedtime. ended up getting cut off cold turkey, tho, and that was no fun. took a few too many, and got the doc worried, i guess. tried to get them refilled over thanksgiving weekend. still a little po'ed about that one.
kind of assuming that i will be getting some today. should be interesting.