If you were over 85, would you appreciate a gift certificate for a cane?

[Bossy Monkey]

My dad and his girlfriend are both 86, pushing 87. Each has had at least one fall, although thankfully nothing has been broken. I'd just get them the canes, but that seems a little presumptuous. So what I want to do is go to the best men's fittings store in town and get a gift certificate that's enough for two stylin' canes. That way it's up to him and if he'd prefer he can get a stylin' jacket or something instead. (I'll certainly see if I can find canes or sticks in the best women's fittings store in town, but I don't think I've ever seen canes in women's stores before.) So whatayathink? Thoughtful, presumptuous or crass?

[crispini]

1. My mother would beat me with it if I got her a cane.

She probably does need one, but she's going to have to make that decision herself, because she would be absolutely furious if she got one for a present.

That said, if you get the gift cert. to a men's store, he can buy it or not, as he likes, so that might work, but I don't know if I'd SAY it was for a cane. :)

[Omphaloskepsis]

2. I think that sounds good..

And canes should be fitted. Someone 6'5" needs a different cane than someone 5'4". It is a good idea for a professional to help find a cane that works best for the person needing one.

[Frosty1]

3. My Grandmother at 90 refused

to use a cane. She said it would make her "look old.":crazy:

[Roon]

6. My Grandfater at 86 said the same thing.

It took a nasty fall, stitches on his face, a cracked rib and a broken neck, and two months in rehab and 3 months using a walker that convinced him to start using a cane.

[some guy]

4. Sure.

I hope when I'm 85 (or over) I am able to appreciate any and every kindness.

[Gormy Cuss]

5. Yes, because it's thoughtful and from a son.

He can choose to use it on cravats or something else, but canes are dignified and he make be tickled at the prospect of getting one.

[Pacifist Patriot]

7. If I need a cane, I'll get a cane.

Heck, I'll probably need one before I'm 50, forget 85.

Nah, I don't see that as a good gift idea. That's like giving mom a vacuum cleaner and dad a lawn mower. They might need one, but the message is terrible.

[Redstone]

8. Hey, Mrs R got me a cane a few months ago, and I didn't get upset, even though

I don't need it yet.

But some day I will, and it'll be nice to have it handy.

Redstone

[rug]

9. At what age do we stop calling them girlfriend?

(The canes are a good idea. They may not like the fact they need them but they'll appreciate a well-fitted cane.)

[pitohui]

13. girlfriend is a relationship not an age

at such time as they chose to marry you may call her your father's wife

otherwise, girlfriend is a hell of a lot more courteous than "that old bat who hangs with my dad hoping to get all his cash if by some odd and incredible chance he croaks before she does"

[rug]

15. I can't bring myself to say girlfriend and cane in the same sentence.

[ThomCat]

10. Back when I could still walk with a cane, I LOVED gifts like that.

I loved being able to get nice canes. :)

There are some really nice sites online that make really wonderful hardwood canes. My favorite canes were African Rosewood and Ebony.

[Breeze54]

11. How are they supposed to go get the canes?

:shrug:

If they're having that much trouble getting around, perhaps you should just go get it for them?

I hate getting "gifts" that I have to go get myself. Not much fun in that.

And if I was 85, I definitely wouldn't want to have to go get a cane!

Why not get them something nice? Like dinner for two or maid service for a day?

Maybe a subscription to National Geographic? :shrug: A warm afghan blanket?

Their favorite coffee and new mugs?

[pitohui]

12. a gift certificate for your dad is yeah it's cold and crass

there's no good way to do this, telling dad you think he's old and needs a cane and oh yeah for extra bonus points his girlfriend is an old lady too -- that's cold

but giving a gift certificate without explanation is what you do for service people, as a christmas tip, it is not appropriate for family members to pretend you don't know them well enough to choose a gift for them, i mean your DAD?

sorry but you are actually going to have to break down and buy a real gift if you want to be courteous, a gift certificate is just not appropriate for your dad

and if you have a loving bone in your body you don't buy your dad or your girlfriend's dad a cane, if they are crippled, guess what, they'll figure it out on their own, unless you're calling them senile as well as halt

[Ariana Celeste]

23. service people?

lol. that's news to my family

[flvegan]

14. Get him a sword cane.

A cane where the handle, when literally unsheathed from the cane, is a sword. It's pretty frikkin macho, yet useful.

I have one. It's damn cool.

[Richardo]

22. Now THAT is the best idea yet.

:thumbsup:

[reyd reid reed]

16. They sell things besides canes

so you should be fine. I think that's a good way to do it. Besides, a cane is something that a person should buy for themselves...if it doesn't 'fit' them, both physically and stylishly, they won't use it.

Great idea!

[Bossy Monkey]

17. Thanks all. On balance, I don't think I'll do it (pun unintentional)

but I appreciated all the constructive comments.

[kwassa]

18. Viagra.

[zanne]

19. Caution: A cane can also be used as a weapon. nt

[_testify_]

20. We bought my grandfather a cane when he was about that age.

We wrapped it like a candy cane, and that made him laugh, which seemed to make it easier for him to accept. :)

[Wapsie B]

21. I'd get a store gift certificate for anything they want.

I've seen people much older than they are spry as anything. Many people fall. And if they ever do get to the point of needing something like that a medical device co. would have more things to offer, such as a cane with 3 or 4 legs, walkers.......