5 Drinking Stories That Put Yours to Shame

[Chovexani]

Turns out, the best drinking stories in history are actually, well, historical. So raise a glass to your forefathers and marvel at these tales.


1. Admiral Edward Russell’s 17th-Century Throwdown
Think you can drink like a sailor? Maybe you should take a moment to reflect on what that truly means.

The record for history’s largest cocktail belongs to British Lord Admiral Edward Russell. In 1694, he threw an officer’s party that employed a garden’s fountain as the punch bowl.

The concoction? A mixture that included 250 gallons of brandy, 125 gallons of Malaga wine, 1,400 pounds of sugar, 2,500 lemons, 20 gallons of lime juice, and 5 pounds of nutmeg.

A series of bartenders actually paddled around in a small wooden canoe, filling up guests’ cups. Not only that, but they had to work in 15-minute shifts to avoid being overcome by the fumes and falling overboard.

The party continued nonstop for a full week, pausing only briefly during rainstorms to erect a silk canopy over the punch to keep it from getting watered down. In fact, the festivities didn’t end until the fountain had been drunk completely dry.

http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/10558

The rest are even better. :rofl:

:beer: :toast:

[DarkTirade]

1. Holy carp...

I can handle my liquor pretty well, but yeah, these put me to shame. :P

[Chovexani]

2. I like the rum swilling elephants

I'm sure Cap'n Jack Sparrow would be proud. :rofl:

[supernova]

3. great stories, Chovexani!

:rofl:

I didn't realize it was actually Paul Revere's 4am Drunken Caterwauling Dash!

:rofl:

[Chovexani]

4. And what a fine patriot he was

:rofl:

[DarkTirade]

5. But why is the rum gone?

Elephants.

[Chovexani]

6. Better than sea turtles.

[DarkTirade]

7. And *shudder*... back hair. :\

[MilesColtrane]

8. Mine goes to Peyton Park.

You might know him only as the voice of the original Chili's "Baby Back Ribs" jingle.

He was actually a fine musician.

I'll just say that the story I heard involved him waking up in a hotel room wearing nothing but a trench coat with no idea how he got there.

[Inchworm]

9. I dunno

:D