Thanks for helping me think about the little things and the big things.

[rbnyc]

The first reason I'm at DU is because I'm a political junky and a hardcore liberal, like most folks here. But even though it's politics that attracted me to this community, I spend most of my time in the non-political forum.

You folks in the Lounge have listened to me, been patient with me, shared wisdom with me, occasionally kicked my ass--but almost always in a nice way--through some serious stuff. From the planning of my wedding to the loss of my baby, from learning how to live with a disability after the car accident to working to overcome that disability, from discovering my high risk for esophageal cancer to receiving my negative biopsies, you've been so generous and have given me so much inspiration and so much material to help me think and learn from every one of these things.

You folks in the Lounge have shown the same generosity when it comes to not so serious things, stupid things, 95.7% of the time to do with poor service in neighborhood restaurants.

Someone made a comment in my thread yesterday about a bad food delivery experience that at least I wasn't in the hospital. I thought, funny, I was so recently in the hospital, you'd think that would have given me a little perspective.

When something huge happens, you know I have feelings of pain and anger, because I've shared them. But there's always an underlying sense of direction, that I have to be strong, get through it, do my best, see the gifts in it. When something little happens, I just feel 100% pure rage, the only thing underlying is destructiveness. When little things go wrong, it's like a license to feel all the negativity that I can't afford to feel when something is actually at stake.

I'm sure eventually I'll learn a better way to deal with those feelings. Especially since I was actually made to think about why I let myself get so mad over sandwiches.

So thanks for listening, thanks for being supportive, thanks for giving me ideas, thanks for liking me, thanks for not liking me, thanks for attacking me, thanks for defending me. You ALL make me think.

And thanks Txlib for:

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."
-- Siddhartha Buddha

EDIT: typo

[rbnyc]

1. One kick before I go.

:kick:

[nini]

2. You're such an inspiration ..

seriously, your strong spirit is a blessing around here.

If I'm ever out your way I want to meet you and we can try and race down the street! Now, that would be a sight!

:hug:

Gina