BREAKING NEWS: Britney is NOT pregnant. I repeat, Britney is NOT pregnant. That is all.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

Britney Spears is not pregnant, there is a God



http://thesuperficial.com/2007/11/britney_spears_is_not_pregnant_there_is_a_god.php

A cover story for In Touch magazine claims that Britney Spears is pregnant. The magazine claims producer J.R. Rotem is the father and texted In Touch to confirm the news. Britney's pal Sam Lufti, who is attached to her at the hip, is saying these rumors are false, and today he sent the following text to Ryan Seacrest who read it on the air:

"It's BS. Don't know who made it up. J.R. doesn't even know what's up. It's fake. Completely fake. We just wrapped her video. Going home to sleep."

Consider this post a public service announcement. I wanted to make sure everyone knew the pregnancy rumors are totally false. God forbid, one of you thought it was true and decided to drink a cartridge of ink toner at work. That would be terrible. Unless you were drinking it because it’s delicious and you see right through the poison control center and all its lies. I know one time I had a glass of toner at work. I think it was when Jayden was born. Not only did I get to go home early, I spent all afternoon talking to my cat. That dude knows stuff.

[billyskank]

1. Oh thank god.

I can carry on with my life now.

[edbermac]

2. She playing around with the turkey baster again?

I truly can't see any guy getting it up for her.

[underpants]

3. Are you kidding?

Do you have any idea what kind of a ***** trophy that would be for some guys??

I _____ed Britney!!!

[Bucky]

4. You don't many Americans, do you?

Or is it just that you can't actually see such a thing because you'd be clawing your eyes out?