Freaky panic attack in class today....yikes.

[bicentennial_baby]

I was in Philosophy class this afternoon...The topic today was Physician Assisted Suicide. Ok, no problem. Until I found out that the video we were going to watch was of a woman dying of ALS who wanted to die. My teacher then went into a graphic description of how people with ALS die, etc, etc, and I started to shake and sweat and panic.

As many of you may know, my Mom was diagnosed with ALS in July. I'm seeing her tomorrow. There is no way in hell I could have sat through that video. I was freaking out. So, I waited patiently until the Prof was done lecturing, and when he went to start the video, I left.

I emailed him and explained and apologized.

Sigh. :shrug:

[SPKrazy]

1. aww that sucks

:hug:

so sorry

don't feel bad about taking care of yourself. That sounds like a very good move on your part

I thought you were going to say you thought you had e. coli.

seriously though, :hug: :hug:

:hi:

[bicentennial_baby]

3. Thank you, friend...

That was my rationale...I had to do what I had to do...And better to leave than to meltdown in front of my 30+ classmates and teacher.

and, :spank:

Thanks :hug:

[lligrd]

2. Gawd, How Awful

I Think The Professor Owes You An Apology. At the very least, he/she should have checked to make sure nobody knew anybody afflicted.

[bicentennial_baby]

4. I thought about that...

I wish the syllabus had been more specific. But, ALS is pretty rare, compared to other diseases like cancer, and maybe it never occurred to him.

Thanks :pals:

[lligrd]

5. I Bet You Will Get One

and he will be more careful in the future. At least I hope so. Best wishes for you and your mom.

[bicentennial_baby]

7. I probably will, he seems like a very nice man

I really like him, and don't hold it against him. I'm sure he'll feel badly about it.

Thank you so much...we can use all the good wishes we can get. :hug:

[datasuspect]

6. i'm taking a neurophysiology class

and they showed all these pics of the central nervous system and pics of brain slices.

i started thinking about the graphic description of the brain the prof was giving, "it's the consistency of an avocado" and i got all dizzy.

i usually don't get grossed out, but that made me all queasy and shit.

[Gormy Cuss]

8. Not so freaky, bi_baby.

I'd say it was perfectly understandable. :hug:

edited for typo.

[bicentennial_baby]

9. I just wasn't expecting it...

And, I was surprised by the sudden and intense nature of my reaction. I'm glad he told us before it started, it would have been worse...

But yes, you're correct :hug:

[Gormy Cuss]

11. The only times I've had panic attacks in the last 25 years have been when I'm caught off guard.

Had you known ahead of time you could have talked to sniffa about how you felt or just decided not to go to class.

Hope you have a good visit with your mother tomorrow.

[bicentennial_baby]

14. Exactly....

I wish I had known....I may have been able to get through it had I been forewarned. C'est la vie...

Thank you! I won't see her much, she's off to Montreal with little Bro to see Rush! One of her favorite bands! My Brother is very sweet...Awesome concert, dinner, hotel...And he's driving! :D

So we'll hang with Pops, take care of him, and chill in the blissful silence of rural Western MA for a bit. I can't wait to see my dogs! Eeeeek!

:hug:

:loveya:

[Shakespeare]

10. Oh, no.

Oh, sweetie, that's awful. And perfectly understandable. :-(

:hug:

Feeling a little better now?

[bicentennial_baby]

12. It was awful!

I took me awhile to get the nerve to leave...I think it's normally so rude to do to a Prof, but in this case... :shrug:

I'm glad that I left. :)

yes, I'm better now. Looking forward to a weekend home in Western MA...Me and Sniffa are going home to take care of Pops while Bro and Mom go to Montreal to see Rush. :D

Silence, no streetlights, no sirens....Ahhhhh.... :)

:hug:

[Shakespeare]

15. I think you definitely made the right decision.

And great timing that you're getting away for the weekend. :hug:

[eyesroll]

13. Yikes. I'm sure the prof will understand.

That happens occasionally in law school, too...one of the old-school torts professors pulled a gun on a friend of mine last year (to demonstrate assault -- placing someone in reasonable apprehension of imminent, harmful or offensive contact -- it worked). Problem is, my friend's sister was held up at gunpoint the previous summer, so she completely broke down.

She talked to the prof a few days later; he apologized profusely and didn't try that again this year.

:hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

16. Wow, that sounds much worse!

How traumatizing! :o

I really like my Prof, he's a nice and funny Bush-hating philosopher. I'm sure he'll feel terrible, which isn't my intention, but I want him to understand. I don't blow off classes for no reason. And I'm glad that other people got to see it, maybe it'll make them more aware of what my Mom's going through, and my family as well... :)

Thanks :hug:

[DS1]

17. *thud*

:hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

20. Indeed...

Thanks. :hug:

[redqueen]

18. That doesn't sound so freaky to me...

that sounds perfectly understandable.

You did the right thing by leaving. :hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

21. Thank you love, I think so too

:hug:

[Critters2]

19. Completely appropriate!

I don't even think you owed the prof an apology. It was good of you to send one, but I don't think it was necessary. It was hugely insensitive of him to not consider that this might have hit home for someone. I mean, imagine if someone in the class had ALS, firsthand. Yep, hugely insensitive.

You did the right thing. I'm just sorry you had to go through it. I've had panic attacks, and I feel for you.

:hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

22. Well, the apology

was more for the act of getting up in the middle of class and walking out...Not the reason behind it. I don't know if that makes sense.

If I had known beforehand, I would have taken him aside and talked to him. He left me no other reasonable option. Like I said above, ALS is pretty rare, compared to say, cancer, and I just assumed that the cases we would be studying would be something like that. I doubt it ever occurred to him. Maybe this is a teaching opportunity for me. The more people aware of ALS and its horrors, the better, imho.

Thank you so much :hug:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

23. i would have started sobbing. perfectly understandable

[bicentennial_baby]

24. I held that back until I got outside....sigh

I was very shaky for a while after...Still made it to Economics of Social Welfare class, and then went and chilled in the Art Studio and worked on my printmaking project. That was nice. :)

[SarahB]

25. I'm sorry.

:hug: You had a big reason, sweetie.

Unlike me. I went into a PMS cry at work Monday and I didn't really have an excuse other than being somewhat overwhelmed at that moment coinciding with my progesterone levels crashing. I (semi-)pulled my shit together and bawled like a baby to my poor husband when I got home. Felt perfectly fine the next day. The joys of womenhood. :eyes:

[bicentennial_baby]

26. Thank you sweetie...

:hug:

Yeah, and I'm PMS-ing too! I've been there...damn hormones. x(

:hug:

:loveya:

[swimboy]

27. I'm awfully sorry you went through that.

How he responds to your email will be the measure of the man.

:hug: