Danger Will Robinson! Please cover your keyboard! Hazardous verbal image ahead!

[Tyler Durden]

You have been warned. This is a verbal image, guaranteed to make you spew coffee or beverage de jur on your trusted web box at the very least.

Yesterday, "Nutsy Fagin" the ex-spouse dropped by from New York to play "aging Teenager" with our 16 year old daughter of whom I have sole custody. She never did "MOM" well, and has made it clear she's doing "girls just want to have fun" to, as she puts it, make up for her fun-deficient childhood.

She doesn't do this any better than anything else she's ever done: this is a person who in the past has told any one of the 3 kids (they lived with me full time, one still left in house) that they will be spending their summer visit with her in Italy, Rural Columbia, Honduras, none of which has ever materialized. In court, she has also run screaming from the room and has on one occasion dropped the "F-Bomb."

(Aside: although this person is diagnosed as both Manic/Depressive and a Borderline Personality, she WAS able to to convince that enemy of all Single Parent Fathers: The "Friend" of the Court to torpedo our move to Canada, costing me a house on the ground and over $50,000 in cash plus sweat equity. I digress.)

Anyway, "Mummy" shows up to play teenager for a day with Gwen, the 16 year old. I get a call on the cell at work from Gwen; "Mom" is going to pay for a NEW PIERCING, a navel job. Joy unconfined. It's not worth the argument, and it will happen eventually. What the Hell.

WARNING, HAVE SOMETHING READY: HERE COMES THE IMAGE.

Gwen comes home to tell me, BOTH SHE AND MOMMY GOT NAVEL PIERCINGS.

YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!


The ex had 4 kids with 5 (count 'em) FIVE ABORTIONS. I was married to her for 7 years in person, 10 on paper, so I've seen the body; and she's changed little since then, but NOW she has a navel piercing in a belly that has enough loose skin to make an extra girdle for and Elvis Impersonator and it's got so many stretch marks it could pass for the back of a "wide wale" corduroy sport coat. OMFG.

This Gwen told me...when? In the middle of dinner. Well I have to lose some weight anyway. At least I didn't puke.

Sorry. I had to share.

[KG]

1. um, thank you for sharing....

[Tyler Durden]

3. Just another joyous result of the mistakes I've made in my life.

[KG]

5. i feel ya pain. hooked up with a couple of whack-jobs myself.

heh. despair.com rocks!

[Tyler Durden]

6. PAIN.

[zanne]

2. Er......yeah

She does sound like a doozy. Did she ever get help for her psychological problems?

[Tyler Durden]

4. Every so often. But not very often.

And she HATES taking the meds. Also has substance abuse issues that crop up from time to time.

If I were her, I would hate MORE waking up in the morning discovering I'd done some other boneheaded thing.

[redqueen]

7. *waits for Rabrrrrrr to show up and lecture you*

[Javaman]

8. Okay, I just have to ask, what did you see in her when you first met? nt