New creationist museum says dinosaurs were on Noah's Ark

[pokerfan]

http://tinyurl.com/2dlmeq

I guess that settles that.

[alarimer]

1. It must have been a pretty big boat

I mean, imagine two T. Rex on a small ship. Or velociraptors.

[Danger Mouse]

2. or brontosaurs, for that matter.

my head hurts just thinking about how ridiculous an idea this is...sigh...

[alarimer]

4. what did they do with the blue whales?

I guess they could swim though so no problem there.

[pokerfan]

5. Interesting question, but I'm more interested

in how they controlled the Pit Bulls for forty days.

[Danger Mouse]

17. noah lost both arms.

his wife laughed at him and said 'look at the pit bull play!'
:hide:

[pokerfan]

29. Noah used dino teenagers!

Smaller than full-sized.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/docs2001/dinos_on_ark.asp

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[genie_weenie]

13. T-REX ate coconuts.

As did all other dinosaurs before man leaarned SIN!

So, no problems!

[philosophie_en_rose]

19. Maybe they were baby dinosaurs.

:P

[Danger Mouse]

21. or maybe they were magical fairy gumdrop dinosaurs

with magical fairy wings that allowed them to fly and their wings sprinkled pixie dust on noah's family and made them happy and forget all their troubles and not at all bothered by all of the people horribly drowning to death...

[philosophie_en_rose]

22. exactly!

:rofl:

[Danger Mouse]

24. or maybe they're just all fucking stupid

and are pulling stuff out of their ass to sound scientific.

[philosophie_en_rose]

23. or a big floating litter box.

That boat must have smelled like a young republican convention.

[realisticphish]

31. "I think we need a bigger boat"

:rofl:

[jmowreader]

37. Genesis 7:2 says either two or fourteen velociraptors

Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that are not clean by two, the male and his female.

The question is, are dinosaurs clean or unclean? According to Leviticus 11:3, animals that are clovenfooted and that chew the cud can be eaten. Velociraptors don't do either, but are you going to argue with one? Like the 800-pound gorilla's feeding habits, velociraptors can do pretty much anything they want.

So let me see here: We have a ship that has either one or seven pair of velociraptors on her when it comes off her moorings. She's afloat for about a year. If you were a velociraptor and the only things you had to do were dine at God's Buffet and screw, what's going to come out of the ship at the end of the journey? A vast number of velociraptors.

[rurallib]

3. Did you not know the Flintstones was a documentary?

[pokerfan]

6. LOL

Man and Dinosaurs - Did they know each other?
http://www.kolbecenter.org/HMiller/index.html

[SPKrazy]

7. Dragons were really dinosaurs

didn't ya know?

:shrug:

:sarcasm:

[Lethe]

8. didn't Noah get drunk and have sex with his daughter?

:shrug:

[SPKrazy]

10. yeah, so?

:rofl:

isn't that the fundie way?

:rofl:

[pokerfan]

12. Someone got drunk and thought up all this shit

"Well, of course, they believe in Dinosaurs, my dear! They are mentioned right there in the Bible – only they are not called "dinosaurs" cause the Lord don't like to make things easy for scientists. Genesis 6:4 tells us that when the sons of God had sex with the daughters of men, they ended up with an enormous litter of giants. Those giants were, of course, the dinosaurs that early humans used to ride to Bible study!"
Rev. Dr. Jerry Falwell

[Danger Mouse]

20. that was lot.

:P
not that it matters.

[caty]

9. Can they get more ignorant?

[Danger Mouse]

18. Probably...but I don't know if I want to know

how much more ignorant they can get.

[WCGreen]

11. Boy they keep moving their facts around faster than a drunken

sailor on shore leave...

[Deja Q]

14. But who smelled Noah's fart?

Maybe that killed the dinosaurs?

:yoiks:

[dropkickpa]

15. That is some funny shit!

I almost have to go there just for the humor factor. Almost.

[Downtown Hound]

16. Jurassic Ark! Cool!

That Noah was one tough sumbitch. Wrasslin' dem T Rexes is hard work you know?

[pepperbear]

25. yes just imagine the poo problem n/t

[Deja Q]

36. The ark must've stunk on the third day... Only 37 more to go, y'all!

:rofl:

[undeterred]

39. Just imagine the sex goings on...

:bounce:

[Whoa_Nelly]

26. Please! Give it a chance! Take the artistically rendered WALK-THROUGH!

O my fucking Dog! :rofl:

http://www.answersingenesis.org/museum/walkthrough/



#19 T. rex

T. rex—the real king of the beasts. That’s the terror that Adam’s sin unleashed! You’ll run into this monster lurking near Adam and Eve. How’s this possible? Find out soon!

[deucemagnet]

28. In a related story,

Fundamentalist historians now believe that Nazis rode dinosaurs.

[Orangepeel]

27. It doesn't even make stupid sense.

If you are going to believe something ridiculous, why not just say that the dinosaurs weren't on the ark and that's why they don't exist today? :shrug:

[laheina]

34. I thought that was their argument.

Now I'm just confused!

[u4ic]

30. What did they feed them?

loaves and fishes? :silly:


There's a lot of shit in that story, but it ain't coming from dinosaurs on arks.

[dEMOK]

32. What can I say...

Now Bible-thumpers are creating revisionist history (which is OK if fact is included).

From the article, "What we've done here is to give people an opportunity to hear information that is not readily available..." I'll say! One of Fox Noise's slogans is, "News you can't find anywhere else."

How gullible do these myopic ideologues think we are?! More importantly -- how gullible are they?!

[chknltl]

33. Did any "gay" dinosaurs survive the flood?

Hah! Indisputable proof that Noah was a damn homophobe!

[Mendocino]

35. "On the third day..

God created the Remington bolt action rifle, so man could fight the dinosaurs and homosexuals"

From Mean Girls

[Maestro]

38. Really stupid

That is about all I have to say to that.

[BarenakedLady]

40. Oh dear

I would laugh if it wasn't so sad...and delusional.

[Mendocino]

41. The bible says that all animals alive at the time of the flood

were taken on the ark (by pairs) The creationists state that all fossil bearing strata was laid down by the flood. So all species present today plus all animals in the fossil record were on the ark. A bigger boat indeed.

[woo me with science]

42. ROFL!!!!

http://www.answersingenesis.org/docs/2.asp


My favorite paragraph from the museum site:

"Creationists, of course, would not be surprised if someone found a living dinosaur. However, evolutionists would then have to explain why they made dogmatic statements that man and dinosaur never lived at the same time. I suspect they would say something to the effect that this dinosaur somehow survived because it was trapped in a remote area that has not changed for millions of years. You see, no matter what is found, or how embarrassing it is to evolutionists’ ideas, they will always be able to concoct an ‘answer’ because evolution is a belief. It is not science—it is not fact!"